Due in Jan 2007 part 4: Sex?! Don't make me laugh! (When I laugh my back hurts MORE, and I wet myself)

[2Happy]

Whaddya think?!

GOOD LUCK URBAN

Hope the wedding goes fantastically and you have a fab time

No news from magazine either!!!

ooo URbn good luck or congrates depending on when you read.

Typed a whole long post the other day and lost it so trying again!

Right - firstly - best of luck Urban, you will have a fab day so enjoy every last minute of it.

JaneNZ I called post office re their insurance and you are covered so long as by your return home you are no more than 32 weeks so I just manage to scrape in there as will be 1 day short of 32 weeks the day I land at heathrow!

Laughalot - my folks live 8 months a year in Clovelly which is a tiny village just of Fish Hoek outside Cape Town - I love it there and we go for at least 2 weeks every year. I've already been once this year and me and DD1 go in November by ourselves then after this baby is born I go for 5 and a half week - yippee escape from the MIL with the newborn!!!!

Re vulva (eek hate that word!) I too feel very swollen down there but I think its all par for the course - i have even found that after riding my scooter it goes all numb and tingly!

Baby is wriggling quite alot now but feels weird so am hoping its still not breach like it was at the 20 weeks scan as I'm desperate for a home brith! Keep meaning to start yoga and swimming but never seem to find the time!

Hope everyone has great weekends and welcome to any newbies.

Just want to say best of luck UD - hope that you get to enjoy yourself heaps!

becks- thanks for ringing the post office, looks like I might just have to cross fingers - and legs - and hope for the best.

And I know what you mean about yoga and swimming, I used to do these a lot before I got pg, but although the mw and doc say to keep it going, I am really just too tired. Feel a bit guilty as I don't really do much exercise at all, a big roundy tummy kind of gets in the way

laughalot - thanks for the description . I did actually wonder if as well as my front bits hurting my bum did too - especially as my tailbone is killing me at the moment!

OH MY GOD!!!!!! I'M MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Congratulations!!! Now go enjoy yourself, or pour a drink over mil, or something, missus!

many congrats urban now enjoy!!!

WOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO

CONGRATULATIONS HUN

hi guys - thanks for your wishes! today's the day where i get to wear my pretty frock....and our parents are cooped up on a boat for 3 hours. eek!!! still, hopefully it should all go ok, but it didn't stop me being awake for five hours last night fretting!

still, i'm a married woman now (for better or worse!)....looking forward to saying DH for the first time!!

Urban fab news hunny enjoy every minute of today
xxxxx

Hattie sorry about the fattie thing I couldnt resist

Becks forgot to say iv been to fish hoek when we went to cape town on holiday I lived near johannesburg.

Have a great day Urban xxxxx

Well ladies I am bloody uncomfy in every sitting position now especially at the computer!!!!! Can't turn over at night coz of back pain and feel like a whale even though mu bump is very neat and I know I don't look 7 months pg I bloody feel it!!!!!!!

Ok so happy thoughts now

Congratulations Urban!!! Hope you had an excellent weekend. And that the mil behaved!?!

Dragon-Everything ok? The last post I could find was your worries about no baby movement!?! Hope all is well.x.

Anyone know when the photoshoot goes to print, if at all?!?!

Well, I have had a really shit week. Not only am I suffering from BAD piles which are making me cry when I need the loo (sorry to those who are squimish) But dh and I are not talking at all. Advice needed- Dh goes out every friday night. Not sure if it's cause of hormonal reasons, but I started checking his phone messages (when I can actually get acess to his phone)I had feelings that he was seeing someone else and they do say that a women 'knows', also on loose women this week they said that the most common time for a bloke to have an affair is when thier partner is pregnant!!!

So, I found texts to a number that is the same number I questioned him about last summer when I found explicit mess about having sex in his office!?! He denyed anything to do with it, saying he didn't know who it was. I rang the number and it went through to 'Julie's voice mail. Yet this same number has again been appearing regulary on his phone with messages like- are u in town? wanna meet up?- and this is like at 10.30pm on a friday night!?! I havee asked him about it obviously, but he says that I am blowing it all out of context and proportion and that there is nothing going on at all with anyone. Problem is, I do not believe him. He has yet to explain 'who' she actually is and 'why' he is meeting her etc. He is just blanking me saying I am the mental one! I packed his suitcase yesterday to kick him out, but I found dd lying on her bed crying not wanting daddy to go and it broke my heart. so dh refused to leave. It is all such a nightmare. My blood pressure is already up and I am to frightened to go for my 2 week check this week cause they may end up putting me in hospital!

I just want to curl up and go to sleep...x.

Sorry all for the EXTRA LONG post and moan, but needed to release it somewhere. My family and friends will only say I told you so. He is a renowned playboy and nobody I care for seems to like the fact I am with him. So really have nobody else to talk to about all this stress...
Thanks all for listening.x.x

Jess
25+2

Jeez, Jess, I don't really know what to say. Except...shit. Sounds so awful , poor you, poor dd. Why won't he explain who Julie is, if it's innocuous? Is there a mutual friend, someone who's also out on a friday who you can ask? (((hugs)))

So sorry you are having a bad time of it Jess ((((((((hugs))))))).

Sounds like a nightmare to deal with while you are preg. Must say that it all sounds a bit suspicous to me, eps if you are pretty sure but he is still being vague. I know there is preg paranoia but I htink men tend to think that any argument when you are preg is due to your hormones and could pos be because they have done anything wrong!

Could you ring this woman and just her. I am sure that if she is a decent woman she would tell you esp if she knows you are preg. Not sure if tha tis good advise as I am not great at giving it but I hope everything works out ok for you. xxxxxxxxx

Congrats Urban. xxxx

Movements now. Just due to the old placenta on the front thing apparently. Keeps kicking my bladder now! Thanks for asking Jess. xxx

I keep seeing this thread on active conversations and I just wanted to say...this is the funniest thread title I've ever seen, love it!

Thanks for the advice girls. It is a nightmare. I won't ring the other women a. cause I am frightened of the truth etc. and b. I havn't got the bottle to do it. The other problem is that we have quite different sets of friends. so don't know who best to ask about wat he does on a friday, and think that men stick together anyway..I just want the truth from him and then we can try to sort it all out. I don't want to be strung along if he doesn't want to be here and made a fool of..

Gotta go get ready now. Off to a friends christening, just dd and me and bump, dh not invited as like i said my friends don't like him...just wish i could have a few vino's and a smoke to chill out! Although probably just as well i can't otherwise i would end up in tears and probably spoil the party!

Catch up soon.x. hopefully with better news..

hey jess.....hope everything is ok mate. try posting a thread on the relationships thread, then you might get some decent advice!! i'm probably not the best person to ask at the moment (totally loved-up newly wed bliss an all...!) but i would definitely confront rather than stew. but that's probably just the type of person i am!!

well, yesterday went well, MIL behaved herself (more or less) and we've got some awesome pictures which i will try and post on here. but if i can't they'll be on myspace next week sometime. we're off to scotland tomorrrow, staying in a town called Oban, which is an 8 hour drive (fun!)...we're breaking the drive in gretna green, thinking about getting married again just for the hell of it (and the gifts!)

so you won't hear from me for a little while, but i hope all goes well, especially for you jess. sometimes it's better not to know though...just a thought...

Congrats Urban and have a lovely break hope your bladder is better than mine on that drive

Jess I dont know what to say except to ask him again and if no luck try the woman (I know you dont want to but it'll be better than stewing) from personal experience I had to do this like you had a feeling something wasnt rght (DH used to wprk shift work 3.30-11.30am) so used to be free all afternoon whilst I was at work anyway he was hiding phone, same numebrs appearing same sought text messages etc this was all while we were planning our wedding! Asked him several times he denied anything saidjust a woman at work having a laugh in the end after 6 months (and several afternoons where his phoned switched off and he dissapeared) I took the afternoon off without him knowing and came home early found him on the pone to this woman (whose husbamd had left her as this was common behaviour from her) grabbed the phone asked her what the hell was going on and got the truth that although they had been 'intimate' they hadnt actually had sex. Kicked DH (fiancee) out told his mum and dad why they were really nice to me and eventaull afetr 2 weeks of begging etc he did move back home and we got married. I always thought I'd leave and not take him back but I trully beleive he was sorry and there were other issuet the time.

Sorry for the long post but just wondered whether somones experience would help (although probably not what you wanted to read)hope you're okay and it ets sorted soon preganancy makes everything 100 times worse as well.

sorry about spelling should read before I press post! Also meant to say all that happened about a year before wedding

Has anyone heard from LTH dont think shes even appeared on the new thread?

Bloke's POV here.

Really saddened by Jess's post. We aren't all like that. Really sorry to read that. Sh1tty behaviour at the best of times, but especially while you are pregnant.

Ar$ehole.

Excuse my language, but I feel it is justified.

Thankyou for all the advice, and the mpov. Nice to know that you are not all w**kers! Was really worried yesterday about leaving dh alone all day while dd and myself were at a friends christening. But dh was actually a bit creepy, he did a few odd jobs/shopping (which is not him at all) and even picked us up when I normally get a taxi and was trying to talk to me as if nothing has happend, like everything is normal!?!....feels like he is guilty to me..I got up at 4am heart pounding and checked his phone whilst he was snoring and found just one text to the other women saying 'sorry'.. Thats it! To me it now feels that something was going on and now he has finished it!?!? Wat do u all reckon?? I just want answers, thats the main problem as I cannot make him tell me anything. If he does eventually talk to me then I am gonna make him swear on his daughters life that he is telling me the truth. He is soo protective of his dd. But if he doesn't talk then am I gonna hold out with the silent treatment forever?!?!

ellipippamummy-It did help reading your experience, cause it has made me think it's ok to forgive. I am so frightened of forcing the truth because I feel I have no choice but to kick him out, but under the right circumstances I feel I could keep the family together. The issue with charlie and tracy on corrie is interesting me to cause she is struggling witht the fact that she loves him even after what he has done...

Hey ho. Am gonna be positive today. Am thinking of little bubba and don't want the stress hurting her. (have to confess that I have actually had 4 fags over the last week..needed something and it did help calm me down..) Having a big cleaning/sort out frenzy today!

Must also add that in dh's first marrige he had an affair which actually started on his stag night!!! Which eventually destroyed his relationship and his wife took him to the cleaners! Then when I got together with him he failed to tell me that he was already seeing someone (The affair women) And 2 timed me! The other women actually called me to ask me what the score was and she left him...stupidly I stayed with him and had his child (which none of the others did)and we have been together 9 years..his longest relationship before me was 3 years. Always felt i was different. I nursed him through cancer as well before we had dd, so feel we have a unique bond...

I am going on big time now!!!!!!!! Soz! Catch u all later.

Thankyou.x.x

jess - glad it helped in a way. Whatever the truth is and whatever you decide to do you will be fine and I have to say my DH has been a saint since (don't think he'd risk the ear bashing again and he idolises DD and don't think he could bear not to be with her and me I hope!) if you need to talk my e mail is michelle parks 11 @ aol. com (no spaces) Good luck!

Well I was having a emotional day of sorting out my sons clothes to see if I had any white stuff so I could keep it for when dd is born, I couldnt stop crying looking at all his little things they are going to a good home though as my sil has just had a little boy. Then I log on here and end up in tears after reading jess problems and that makes mine look so pathetic, jess I am totally crap giving advice I would confront dh again but that is just me and how I would be if I was in your situation, do you think the sorry thing might mean he has seen sense and broken off whatever may have been going on ? Remember do what is right for you and yes it is ok to forgive someone and sort through your problems.

Sorry about what you are going through jess, pregnancy is hard enough without any extra stress. I am not qualified to give advice, but if it was me I would ring the other woman, maybe even get someone else i.e. a best friend to do it, it may not be what you want to hear but at least you will know the truth. Anyway hope it all gets sorted for you.

Weekend for me was really quiet, I am pretty sure bubs had hiccups - strange but lovely feeling. Am having difficulty sleeping now though, my hips get really sore, anyone else had this?