December 2014 Thread #4

[miraculous2]

Stats anyone?!

been busy today. finally getting over the gall of the ex. hubby has calmed down thankfully and im over the worst of the worry about baby.

nipples calmed down today but still sensitive. hips continue to grumble so keeping an eye on it. hoping they calm down. how is everyone today?

drew'swife what a cheek of your ex. Sounds like he is stirring do don't let him achieve his aim. I'm not saying for one minute that miscarriage is anyone's "fault" but my understanding is that for many of the early ones, the issue is just as likely to be due to the sperm. So he is factually incorrect as well as being an arsehole.

catface it's amazing how it seems to be personality and not experience that makes a better midwife. Glad you are getting some support.

AFM I'm bone tired today. We are on holiday (at home) and I have zero energy. Not sure if its a bug or a baby growth spurt but could do without feeling so useless tomorrow!
On the plus side, no more leaking boobs!

emily if you are reading, I'm still thinking of you x

Hi, everyone ok? I've been for my first consultant's appointment today and it went really well. They were really pleased with how things are going and all my blood results were really good too. It's so good to know that even with having terrible ms and trouble controlling my diabetes right through the first tri I've actually managed to keep myself within the optimum range.

They don't need to see me back in clinic for 4 wks which is great as I had to be seen every 1-2 wks in my last/1st pg. I was really pleased that it was the same consultant as last time too and she remembered me which made me relax instantly.

Sadly I received a letter today cancelling my 20wk scan, telling me I will only get the Fetal ECG a week later. I was originally told I would get both so I'm feeling a bit disappointed.

15+1

Catface when I was in hospital having DS there were 2 student MWs and they were the nicest of the whole bunch. I think they were the only ones who really cared and took the time to talk to you. Pure loveliness.

DaddyPig what is AFM? Sorry I'm being think!

polythene sorry - acronym queen here it means "as for me"

Why would you not get a 20 week scan??

Haha I thought it was some sort of medical acronym! I was thinking "hmm I wonder if that's what's wrong with me? I'm bloody knackered too!" It's the end of a long day!

The ECG is a more detailed scan which looks closely at the brain, spine and hearth, so I'm guessing they don't actually need to do both. I was just looking forward to seeing my little sprout in 4 wks and now I have to wait longer

Football & children took over, but I'm here again!

Drews, I'm suprised you & DH aren't currently locked up, what an arseholey thing for ex to say!

My boobs have suddenly decided rock hard & leaking is the way forward. Feeling pregnant now.

CatFace, sounds good! I had just gotten over horrible depression when pg with DS1 & was under the mental health MW team, really good service with extra appointments etc so hope it's the same for you.

15 & a bit weeks here, officially out of normal trousers & full time maternity clothes.

Absolutely Fatigued Mum? Annihilated From Morningsickness?!

Take your pic

Ah, I understand re the scan. It's frustrating to have to wait. I'm 15 plus 1 too :)

My boobs seem to have trebled in size over the course if the day, went to PiLs for dinner as DH is staying away with work tonight and DS was trying to get them out all evening, he clearly likes them like this, guess my DH will too, but he liked them before too . DS on the other hand hasn't been bothered with them since I finished BFing him about 6 months ago.

I had a letter the other day about my consultants appointment, I was very confused until I realised that my MW had explained that due to having had a EMCS 9 months ago I need to be under consultant care aswell - duh.

I love my MW, I had her with DS too and at my booking appointment we just sat chatting for ages while DS happily chewed on her circle thingie that tells you due dates, he also fell in love with her when she let him keep it .

Really hoping to hear from Emily too.

Still cramping this morning but I think its because I have been running about like an idiot all week. Iys really annoying when people say "careful dont overdo it!" then give you stuff to do or dont help you with the stuff you are doing.

On a train to London at mo. Overnighter for a training course which wont be much good in the grand scheme of things. At least I have a night in a hotel where I can have a bath and read my book in bed all evening in peace I swear thats the thought thats making it ok that I have a rubbish journey ahead as my boss books arse about face trains for me! Doubly annoying as I would have heard hb tomorrow but for this course! Now have to wait two weeks!

For all those struggling with their MH. Hope today is a better day. Peace, it sounds like your medical care is atrocious. I hope you find someone with a better professional attitude to listen!

I woke up panicing after a horrible dream about being in labour. I dont even want to think about that bit yet

Is it bad Im actually looking forward to labour? Suppose most FTMs are scared/unsure what to anticipate but I'm genuinely excited about it!

Keep getting bad nights sleep. 1hr on one side, roll over, have a drink, 1hr on the otherside. Rinse.and repeat, adding in toilet breaks every 3 rotations and crazy dreams about ex-school mates... Argh!

Sadly Im npw fearing the worst for Emily being incommunicado, but my thoughts are with her and really still hoping for a positive outcome. Hoping shes lurking

Sorry about the split post, phone strops if I type too much!

As for boobs, usually my nipples are only erect at the tiny bit, but now when I wake up the whole of my nipple area is raised and solid - really uncomfy and makes it look like I have a.miniboob ontop of my regular boob. It goes down again within an hour or 2 of getting up. Weird.

15+4

BigHairyLeggedSpider, that sounds crap, at least when you get back it'll be the weekend.

My DH does that, "don't do too much today, but can you do this, this and this, while chasing round DS and doing all the normal housework" that really gets my goat

Hello all, newbie here.. just come out of my 16week consultant appointment because my bmi is 40 :@ anyway all seemed ok but just seem to now have a zillion appointments, meeting the anaesthiologist or however you spell it, a gtt test etc etc.. after she told me about each new appointment she would add (just in case) I just feel really annoyed and I know it is probably hormones but still :( Anyway the reason for the post was to ask has anyone else been advised to take aspirin as its meant to have more positive effects than negative? Ive been prescribed it but Im not sure? 15+6 x

hannie im on asprin. im in the league of fatties who have to go to a class about my.weight and healthy eating. im 33 bmi.

asprin is for migraines and potential blood pressure problems. mine us low not high....... now idea how unfair it feels.

I am being referred to a psychiatrist. not happy about it but will go. I had borderline psychosis first time around. but given I was in domestic violence situation its not surprising. my mental health is much improved and only had anxiety after bullying at work and deaths in the family.

I spent 3 months in psychiatric hospital after dd was born. again ex made allegations that I did things I knew I hadnt but no one believed me.

but its another appointment hey ho.

boobs still sore today.

15+1

Sasseh- the giving birth bit is what I'm really looking forward to. This is my 4th and a surprise but I'm excited at having the chance to do it again. It's the most incredible experience and I can't wait!

DrewsWife- I really admire you for your honesty. I think one of the great things about forums like this is that you hear real-life experiences rather than the 'hearts and flowers' we're usually fed. If someone had told me before my first that it was quite usual, and not terrible of me, not to fall utterly in love with my baby at first sight it would have saved a lot of heartache. I fell in love slowly over time but that huge rush of love (which I had with number 2) just didn't happen.

In short, it's good we can be honest without being- I hope - too scarey for first timers.

Me too coddled I had exact same experience re no immediate rush of love and it grew slowly (after a few weeks I was bursting with love!). I felt like such a failure/unnatural mum but have since found from talking to mum friends/mumsnet that this is entirely normal! I had a horrendous birth last time (which I think is directly linked to lack of first rush of love-I was too traumatised/shell shocked I think to feel much at all) so I'm not particularly looking forward to it but I am very much hoping it will be a more positive experience this time.

I think the problem is that motherhood is portrayed as this fluffy wonderful time of roses... perfect makeup and domestic bliss.

these adorable.little creatures are strangers and we need to learn how to deal with them. we need to adapt how we have lived for decades and built our own routine.

I didnt love mine when I first got her. she terrified me. I was 19 I had to have a section which was traumatic. I had a crap partner who told me how useless I was and how great he was at parenting. my mil would come in tell me how badly I had dressed my child and redressed her.

docs believed when he said I attacked my baby and trashed my house. as did police. despite the fact no one checked it out.

seems like being a mother means you constantly have to prove yourself.

dont be hard on yourselves girls. we do the best we can one day at a time.

if we have mental health issues its not the end of the world.

Does anyone have a gender preference? I know that the baby being healthy is the most important thing by far, but I can't help hoping it's a boy. And feeling like I might be disappointed if it's a girl I feel like a terrible mother already and it's making me feel really rubbish even thinking it!

At the very beginning my DH said he hoped it was a girl and that he might be disappointed if it was a boy which frankly made me very but since the scan he has taken to calling it a "he" and he really doesn't seem fussed either way, as long as it's healthy I honestly have zero preference, but I think sometimes it's natural to have one and you shouldn't feel bad if you do.

drew I'm glad you managed your way out of an abusive relationship, and found someone else. It is not easy.

I've always wanted a girl, then realised it would be awful and unfair to be upset if it turns out a boy, so convinced myself it was a boy, and liked the idea too. Sonographer at 12w scan guessed a girl, and honestly I no longer care, boy or girl, I'm happy either way

hannie welcome and congrats.

I'm also on 75mg aspirin a day, at first it was only til 12 w (FET) but then book in midwife said carry on til the end, no sure why, I have no known problem at this stage. I will ask next midwife on Tuesday. From what Google says, it helps placenta growth and it's also used against sticky blood (when baby doesn't get enough oxygen) but don't take my word for it.

I would prefer a girl this time just because I already have a boy and really like the idea of a grown up DD. But after the highly stressful pg I had last time I'm just hoping for healthy and I know if it's another DS I will love him just as much, plus we've got everything we need for a boy already and it would be nice for DS to have a brother too.

I got put on baby aspirin yesterday. They didn't really explain why but I presumed it is because of my diabetes and I know it is generally thought to be a good thing in pg. I shall be a good girl and down it once a day anyway. Glad to be finishing the folic acid in a few days!

I really don't mind whether it's a boy or girl to be honest.

DH would prefer a boy but that's only because he wants 4 DC and the youngest to be a girl (don't ask).

I really don't mind, but we have everything if it's a boy

I've always wanted a girl to be honest, I've been trying to convince myself it's a boy so that I dont end up disappointed. Disappointed may not be the right word as a healthy boy or girl would be great really. I can't help feel guilty for feeling that though. And then I feel really shallow too as when looking at baby clothes I'm all "squee, cute little dresses" at girls clothes and "meh, boring" at boys clothes.

The specialist MH midwife is meeting me next week to discuss things. She's coming to my house though which has instantly put me in a bit of a tizz. I'll have to tidy and wotnot

Told one of the very streetwise (but very likeable) year 6 girls that I was pregnant today as she was clearly on to me! So I expect news will begin to spread. I don't have my own class and I'm not going round all 8 classes announcing it. To be honest I'm surprised more haven't picked up on it due to the size of my belly!

Sleeping terribly. Like someone else (covent?) Said it's constant...wake up in pain, switch sides, wake up an hour later in pain, switch sides and repeat (with added wee-breaks) felt like I'd been beaten up this morning!

16+4