September 2014 - we're over half way there!

[HippyJess]

Shiny noo thread with only 4 full months to go! Where did the time go??

Cumbrian I feel exactly the same. I no longer exist... especially at work. Every conversation is about baby or childbirth! I also can't lift anything at school without some1 tearing it from my hands, and I know they mean well but seem to have forgotten I am an adult and know my limits...and I would never do anything to harm my baby! I also got lots of compliments on how nice a dress I wore this week was. Wouldn't mind but have worn it loads in the past and no1 batted an eyelid :#

Am sharing a lot of your feelings cumbrian and marie. Again, work is the worst. Of course I'm excited and it's nice to have some baby talk, but I swear it's almost become impossible for anyone at work to talk to me without relating it back to some thing pregnancy or baby related. I am still capable of talking about other things! It doesn't help that I work with different staff every day (it's shift work in a big team). So every day I end up answering the same questions:

1. When are you due?
2. When are you going on maternity leave?
3. What names have you been thinking of?
4. Do you have any cravings?
5. And, until finding out yesterday, the question I got asked almost continuously; 'do you want a girl or a boy'? I'm truly bored of having the same conversation again and again and again.

I don't even get my coat off in the mornings before my team are asking how big my bump is & asking me to turn sideways so they can have a look! You'd they'd never seen a pregnant woman before! Might get a tshirt printed soon with all the answers to the regular questions on so I don't have to keep repeating myself!

hi ladies, I have a 10 month old son and I am pregnant with my second child due on the 28th September. 20 weeks scan coming up next week, very excited, I'm wanting to keep the sex of the baby a surprise. It would be great to have a chat and just have some support :) xx

EDD=28th september

Welcome pelpixie congratulations to you!
Sadly I feel like my regular friends are ignoring me now I'm pregnant, no one wants to talk to me about baby, nor ask any q's so I feel the opposite really, even DH doesn't talk about it anymore, he's more interested in his gym. I don't get asked anywhere. I must be really boring now I can't drink alcohol or stay up late!
My spots are back with avengence, I thought I was past the worst but no, absolutely covered again, sore, huge, red impossible to cover :( not feeling it today

Dinah arw you having a boy? I had horrible acne with 1st, a little with second and nothing this time even though this is a boy too (flashed at us lol)

is waffles around? or anyone else? I feel like since starting these injections baby isnt as active? Im sure its just going to be that hes moved position so csnt feel as much. Is it even possible for this to effect him?
Thank you

Glad I'm not the only one! I'm getting good at being 'busy' when I get too annoyed at work. Facebook is what is annoying me more. Currently torn between deleting my account, having a big long rant about how I know my life is going to change, or having a competition with myself to see what the oddest status is that ends up baby related

Welcome pelpixie

Dinah I know I am complaining that everything is about baby in my conversations, but feeling like people are not even wanting to talk to you at all must be awful. I wish I could offer advise. Have you spoken to DH about how you feel?

Thanks cumbrian I'm possibly just overreacting, perhaps when you don't have children you just don't know what to say, I suppose I didn't before I was pg, it would just be nice for my best friend to perhaps ask how it's going every now & again, DH says he interested, but not so much as wanting to get the house ready or buy anything, that's just up to me, again I'm possibly overreacting, I just thought he might be as excited as I am!
ilove I'm really not sure what I'm having, the sonographer said it looks like a girl but she wasn't sure, I just hope they go when I've given birth!
Sorry you are worried about decreased movement, mine doesn't feel like it moves that much some days.

I get a bit fed up if baby talk too. Have any of you had a birthday whilst pregnant? I found that all the presents were actually for the baby! lol. I didn't mind too much as it'll save me money but still.... I exist too! Lol.

I have the opposite problem at work - I am still struggling to find ways to tell people I am pregnant - ridiculous at 21 weeks I know! As I'm only 6 weeks into a new job, some people I manage I'm meeting for the first time (often at meetings) and it just feels like the right time is never there to tell them. I've told my boss, some very senior people above me, and one of my team - all have reacted well, but even so I'm really struggling to tell people - as I don't want to announce to lots of people at once, and have not had many one-to-one opportunities without multiple other listening. I feel so self conscious and have achy abdo muscles from holding my belly in all day! I've been wearing clothes that are very good at hiding the bump, but terrified about the reactions of my team - as they are unlikely to fill my post whilst I'm on mat leave, which means the team will not really have the leadership/support they need. They are so excited that I'm there - I feel that their opinion of me will plummet the moment they realise. I feel like I've not been able to enjoy this pregnancy as most people don't know and at work, I don't want to be pregnant right now!!
Re changing hospital/antenatal - anyone who is disappointed with their service should definitely write to PALS and their GP. I am going to - purely because really simple changes could make the new mum experience soooo much better at my surgery. I've been really frustrated with the poor organisation and lack of information about the choices - though the individual clinicians have been fantastic - I think they probably just don't realise how it is for the patient (and I am a nurse in the NHS, so I think I'm being quite objective here).
I had the choice of 3 hospitals, all have different ante-natal care associated with them. I didn't know this at the point of choosing but it would have been useful to have this information. You can change your hospital at any time, and if you turn up in labour at any hospital, they will see you there, even if you're not booked there. Please put your problems into writing though, as this can help change the system. If they receive complaints about a service, the management have to review it and look at improving things.
Thanks for the lovely holiday recommendations. It doesn't have to be abroad, but I do love sun and being hot. A bit ok UK luxury might compensate for the risk of no sun.
Sorry about the long post.

Hello All,

Waaaaah I have to wait ages for my scan!!

Yep same questions here to,

btw tho, interested to know when all you guys are going on maternity leave?

I'm going 13th of June (using up 5 weeks annual leave first then maternity) I cannot wait!

Dinah My best friend is similar I.e doesn't ask anything baby related at all, but when she does talk baby it's negative - she was the one who thought it would be 'helpful' to tell me that birth horror story of her work colleague. Still not forgiven her for that tbh. For whatever reason some people seem to have a hard time being happy for others!

My work colleagues have been fine luckily, apart from one uninvited bump touch the other day lol. When I walk in the staffroom in the morning it makes me laugh how they say good morning while simultaneously lowering their eyes to look at my bump!

Welcome pelpixie :)

I'm going to try and work up to the 9th of September dd is the 23rd!

Wow your doing good to do that cookielove i wanted to work till the end to but been having awful pain in my hips! I'm not due till 5th of September so mat leave starting at 34 weeks but I just don't think I could of waited any longer!

I wanna get the most out of my maternity leave :)

I think I won't make it though as I work in a nursery baby room and its meant to be really hot this summer but we will see :)

I'm planning on not starting my maternity leave until my due week so I can have a whole year off once baby is here, but using up 3 weeks annual leave before this so I actually leave at 37 weeks, so late August? Not sure if I'm being ambitious here or not? Does anyone who has done this before have any advice? I work as a nurse so can potentially be on my feet a lot and job can be stressful, if that makes a differnce. Am just really keen to have a whole year off with baby, and will also save money as less weeks spent paying for childcare. xx

I am planning on working up to 29th August, Due 3rd Sep. I may be ambitious, but I work in an office and I can work from home a couple of days a week so I am hoping I will be ok. And if not, I can use up some Annual Leave as my boss is pretty flexible

Blimey Cumbrian that is ambitious! xxx

I think i'll probably leave mid-late July and use the rest of my annual leave before maternity leave starts. It's difficult because you obviously want as much time with baby as possible but I think it's important to also have some time to get ready and prepared - and sleep too if possible! A friend at work is from Slovakia and thinks our maternity leave/pay is awful and says that there they get 3 years leave per baby!

At work it is a lot of people asking "How's bump?" rather than myself - tends to be women who have not had children yet so obviously have the same knowledge of pregnancy that most people have before they experience it, which even though is probably better than the average man is not that good! (I certainly thought I knew more than I did now it's actually happened to me!) So a lot of being asked about cravings, as that's a stereotypical symptom. One girl asks me about it practically every day like it is not a proper pregnancy without it! I feel like saying "No, no cravings, but I have more spots than I did when I was a teenager, continuous heart burn and I regularly cry in public."

Equally, my closest friends, when I told them about a month ago (quite late really) did the initial congratulations but have not made any effort to see me or ask about how things are since then. They've gone to Bath this weekend to visit another of our friends, and I mentioned when I told the one who lives in Bath that I was pregnant that I probably wouldn't go, but none of them actually spoke to me about it afterwards. I haven't announced it on facebook so luckily don't have to deal with all of those comments yet, though I can't really say much on fb as so much of my life revolves around being pregnant now, without casually slipping it in to a status...

My DP got to feel kicks for the first time this morning, his face was very excited, so that was very nice. Hoping it will spur him on to continue painting the tiny baby room white which he has been doing since we moved in in November - before I was even pregnant!

Thanks Misscaff, I am definitely going to consider complaining but only after talking to my GP...
About telling colleagues, I am not in your position of joining work recently, but was also nervous about telling and how my team felt, etc; what I did in the end was after telling the direct boss and his senior and my closest members of team in person, then I bought some cakes and sweets for all and did a memo for every body else... I felt so much better after, not worrying what to wear and how to deal with it... This solution of course may not work for everybody but I quite understand how you feel right now... I am sure everybody else will be supportive too; people have been much more supportive than I imagined around me... But I haven't had to share it with clients yet which is my bit worry...

I'm starting mat leave on my due date (26th August) but will actually stop work on 18th July for the school summer hols when I'll be just over 34 weeks. Then plan on returning beginning of July 2015, 2 weeks before summer hols start again. Bit jammy but this way I will get to spend a proper whole year with baby before returning full time ( :( ) Gotta take the perks of teaching where you can lol :).

Deardinah- I had my first well before all my friends and basically lost the friendships I guess they didn't know how to behave but it was very hurtful at the time. I did make a lot of new friends though and a couple of my old friends became friendly again when we were all pregnant together 5 years later.
This time I have the opposite problem that most of my friends are past wanting more kids (and a couple have dh's who still push for more) but at least once your friendship group is based around children another is less of an issue.
I'm aiming to start mat leave at 37 weeks (August bank holiday) but have 2 weeks holiday that I will use to work short weeks through the summer. I think that will be better for me than using them to go on leave at 35 weeks but I'll have to see how I go.

With friends I am having mixed experience... My closest friends who i have known for more than 20 years are miles away, but we are in touch most days electronically and they are excited for me... But my friends over here, reacted very nicely when I told them first, but I feel I am now out of the circle of friends without babies, suddenly they are not very interested in meeting up, etc...

I am using 1 to 2 weeks annual leave before due date , so will be working until 38th week earliest or 39th week latest... I start my Mat leave from the due date (2nd Sep) but will only take 3month off as ML ; Afterwards I will work half day in office and half day from home until baby is 6 month. My boss was OK with this too, which I feel good about, I can breast feed until baby is 6 month then.

My only worry is that even-though I am only away for 3 months, my boss feels vulnerable leaving my team without lead so he is talking to recruiters from Tuesday to find somebody, not only to cover my leave, but as permanent (impossible to find mat cover for my sort of role)- this will feel very odd when I am back at work I think... Although my boss told me I will still have my role and will be leading the team... It still doesn't feel fine if you know what I mean...

cookie is it your first? If so, just take it as it comes and hope for the best! I left work at 36 weeks with DS though I wanted to leave at 39 but was too uncomfy. My due date then was 29th of august tho and it was a baking summer which defintely doesn't help!