October 2011 Baby Bus ... part 3

[elgoldenflower]

A place for all the mums due in October 2011

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We have our 20 wk scan on Tuesday - we both want to find out what we're having.

Dugs - sorry to hear you're having a crap time at work. I can't wait to finish and stop stressing about the commute etc. Luckily my work are being v understanding (probably because last time I went into labour on the premises 9 weeks early!!) but this is making me very emotional - I managed to sob three times at work this week on three different people, none of them I'm particularly friendly with, but were all trying to be nice and ask how I was coping! Evidently not so well!

Hey everyone

I'm quite to read that you're all (most of you anyway) feeling movements as I'm not yet and I want to I had felt little 'plips' by this stage last time but no matter how hard I try I can't feel anything yet.

Also I've just checked my diary and my 21 week scan is still a whole month away At least time has started to move at a normal speed again; first trimester slowtime is very trying. We're not going to find out the sex. I loved having a surprise last time (particularly as she was a girl, I so so so so wanted a girl, now I really don't mind).

Sympathies to all with MS, pelvic pain and problems at work. Other than feeling bloody knackered (and that's DD's fault I'm sure) I feel fine just huge already. I checked out some of your bump photos; I'd be embarrassed to post mine; double the size, seriously. It's all cake

Hello bus people! I haven't been on for a while again, but have been following everyone's posts and progress. We have our 20 week scan this Thursday, excited but worried too as this seems to be a 'big one'! I've been feeling baby move a lot, it's properly kicking now, but I am very skinny, so not sure if I can feel it more as I have 'no meat' on me :)!! I also got a doppler which I use occasionally to find a heartbeat and it's a brilliant thing for reassurance. We are definitely going to find out if we are having boy or a girl we both want to know, so can't wait for Thursday (got this feeling it's a boy not sure why as it's my first so nothing to compare to!)..

I'm sorry to hear that some of you are having problems at work, hang in there and try not to stress too much..

My MS is almost gone, although still here in the morning when I first wake up, but I am soooooo tired. Is anyone else tired, I'm constantly knackered?

Yep constantly exhausted too!
I had 3weeks off work followed by 4weeks reduced hours and a 2week holiday and I need to go back to 10 hour shifts from tomorrow.

Roll on october so that we don't need to work for a while.

I have a criminal law exam this morning wish me luck!

Good luck Leo - are you training to be a lawyer? That's what I do (public/commercial though, not criminal).

All is good here - had horrendous first trimester but am now 18 weeks and feeling, if not blooming, then at least comparatively good - no more sickness after weeks on drugs, just a bit tired really. Such a relief! Scan on 7th June and before that we've got two weeks in Spain so a lot to look fwd to.

Best of luck to everyone having scans this week.

Hello all - welcome duginthesnow

Bubalie - how exciting! With DS he went straight to the kicking at about 18 weeks no bubbles or blips and didn't stop all the way to 41 weeks but don't worry he was only 6.5lb when he was born just bloody active and strong! (Although they did say to me to prepare for a 9lber because he appeared to be so big and strong inside) Even now he can kick like a donkey (which is lovely in the tantrum stages!!! )

Scones/bubalie, snap - knackered too. I spent the weekend shopping for house bits (we've just built a big extension) and finishing off rooms and my body feels like I've gone ten rounds with Mike Tyson.

We are not going to find out the sexes next week unless it's obvious and despite DH, all DH''s family and my sister demanding I do! I think I know what they both are from the heartbeats and personally it was the only thing that got me through the last few weeks with DS wondering what he was and the anticipation. I was convinced DS was a girl, I had dreams about DH and a baby girl playing on the beach - although I think I was perhaps over-compensating because I'd always said because I was one of all girls I would have loved a boy first to be the older brother and DH being from a very traditional country where boys are seen as the protectors of the family desperately wanted a boy first so when DS came out I was so shocked I think my words were 'it's a boy - look at the size of his feet!!' (He had very big feet for a tiny baby!)

All being well with the scan next week we are going away w/c 6th June and I can't wait to not be at work. Then after that it's only 6 weeks until I finish commuting up to London at the beginning of August, a month working from home and I'm going to finish early September - even if the babies stay inside for the full 40 weeks I am already uncomfortably big and I just know I wont be able to keep going that long.

Good luck with your exam leo x

Morning all,

Good Luck with your exam Leo. So glad to hear it's not just me feeling exhausted and having occasional MS still (nausea mainly when I've overdone it).
I'm 19+1 today and can feel the baby (it's my first) either that or there's something very odd going on in my tummy at certain points in the day!

Was very worried yesterday had really sharp pain in my lower left abdomen that got worse when I walked/ changed position. It seemed to calm down after I was banished to the sofa for the afternoon (DP getting terribly overprotective and a little bit cave man about the whole thing!)

I'm hoping it was just from walking through the whole of Exeter town centre Saturday looking for something to wear to a friends wedding in June but am keeping an eye on it in case it reappears. has anyone else felt similar?

LittlePebble snap on dates! Over the weekend I decided that I am pretty sure it is baby I can feel wriggling and occasionally kicking, and mostly after I have eaten. DH is v excited that it must be a boy and will be a footballer with advanced kicking skills...
Also with you, those of you who are really tired: I think it must be because the LOs are growing so quickly at the moment, because I was feeling pretty bright and awake a couple of weeks ago, but tiredness has definately hit again - am needing afternoon naps all the time (which is very inconvenient at work!)
So seems about 50-50 on finding out about sex at scan then so far? I still really want to find out (ours is in 2 weeks) but DH undecided...more views on this please...!
Good luck with exam Leo

rebel I think DH will want to know when you are there if he is undecided as the excitement will get the better of it. I really didn't want to know with DS and even I had to think twice in the scan as there was this huge part of me excited to know and being so close...

the excitement will get the better of him, not it!

Afternoon, all :) and hello to more newbies on the bus! I've been reading along, but haven't been wanting to post, because I feel like I'm getting a bad attitude about some aspects of up-duffedness and I'm worried about bringing the mood down. We signed up to a HypnoBirthing course, but when I received the book and CD from the tutor, I got really stressed by how much it all irritated the hell out of me, so much so that I'm going to cancel the course. Then I went to my first pg yoga class last night, where the tutor invited us all to bond with our babies and send messages in our heads to them. I had no idea how to do any bonding (being on the end of the umbilical cord seems bonded enough for me for now), and had no message at all for it.

And it's just occurred to me that I'm actually pretty freaked out and panicked by the idea of starting to feel movements (16+6 at the moment). The thought of feeling something wriggling around in my innards still just puts me in mind of a tapeworm or some other intestinal parasite, and makes my skin feel all crawly!

Sorry to be such a downer :( Has anyone else been feeling like this a wee bit, or am I just being a weirdo/bad parent already?

Leo good luck in your exam!! Hope it all goes well!

BabC I'm with you - it is really weird to have something moving inside you. I've only had the slightest of flutters (and usually after eating something REALLY sugary :S) but it is a bizarre thing to experience!! I agree with the bonding thing - I don't feel the need to send a message to the baby, I think about it all the time anyway!! Don't feel stressed out by what others are doing!

tiredness oh my life - I'm with the rest of you. I kept reading all these books that said things like 'second trimester you'll be glowing and have loads of energy'....I constantly feel like I need to sleep and just ache so, so much! It's been worse this week and I've been on annual leave so I dread going in tomorrow! YIKES!!

babyC - pregnancy is different for everyone and each pregnancy different in itself and you are not a bad parent or weird! I hated being pregnant with DS it made me sick and irritable and I just didn't enjoy it or bloom in the way my friends and sister seem to have done. I went to one antenatal class and got so annoyed by it all and the ridiculous woman telling me that labour was like a climbing a mountain with your breath and hopping over clouds at the top and trying out quite frankly ridiculous labour positions that I never went back for the others! And I didn't feel connected or protective of DS until he was out (and I didn't have the rush of love people told me about when he first emerged either). Don't get me wrong we definitely have that bond now and I would lay down my life for him but I didn't get that maternal thing until a while after he was born.

This pregnancy is the complete opposite and I already and too protective of them and worrying too much about every movement and appointment compared to how I was with DS (I am also enjoying it a bit more although I still couldn't say I loved being pregnant ever!!) so please don't feel bad and don't not post because you are worried about how you are feeling. In the words of my sons favourite character shrek 'better out than in' although he is mostly talking about flatulence not baby fears! I remember my mw saying to me when I was brave enough to admit I hated being pregnant that it was perfectly normal to feel that way and pregnancy wasn't a mould that women had to fit into but the other way around women are a mould that their pregnancy has to fit into and it may take a while for that to happen.

BabC, I know just where you're coming from! Ours is a desperately wanted baby (IVF) and loved so much already by both of us, but my only actual messages so far have been "please stop making me feel sick" and "please stop kicking me"! I think of mine as a golden hamster wriggling around, which is fine as we had hamsters when I was little and they were really cute. Even after the birth apparently it's normal for a few weeks to pass before you truly bond with the baby.

BabC I agree with confused and BB3 I didn't really bond with DS until about 6weeks and that was despite EBF
I don't feel "bonded" with this baby either I take the view that you wouldn't be in love with an adult instantly, I still need to get to know my babies before I grow to love them.

Everyone who wished me luck ...it worked..went really well as it goes...

Bumpadaisy I am at university at the moment..so won't decide on what I am doing until I finish...But hopefully some kind of solicitor!

BabC I do have a bond with my baby at the moment (kindof)..but because I have had a rough time so far I do not enjoy pregnancy AT ALL! I just want it to be over and done with..All my friends that are pregnant love it and say its the best thing...and I will miss my bump! I doubt it very much! I'm sure you will feel a connection with your baby eventually ...its not as easy as it seems..the way I see it is its not my babys fault he/she is stuck inside of me ..so therefore I don't blame him/her for how I am feeling! I hope you feel better soon...

and o the hypno-therapy ...one of my friends tried to get me to do that...and I just laughed alll the way through the CD.

I'm so glad that other people are also saying that they're not enjoying being pregnant! It made me feel quite disappointed about how negative my feelings are but you guys have made me feel a lot better!! Thanks all!!

BabC The idea of a wierd alien movement really freaked me out at first (as did the idea of breastfeeding) but when I started feeling the obvious movements I really like it... well, maybe not the kicks in the ribs!
I even missed the movements when DD was born.
What I liked was I felt like I knew her routines before she was born. From about 7 month she always got hiccups and was very fidgety between 11 and 12 every night. On the night she was born I was painfully pacing the corridor of the labour ward trying not to wake anyone while she was wide awake and hiccuping. A nurse said "if you put her down she'll settle" but I knew she wouldn't for an hour.

I haven't bonded with this baby yet, hopefully I will now I've started feeling movements but at the moment I'm too tired, stressed and busy.

But... I've taken the plunge today and emailed the manager at my second job (the one which is causing me the back pain) that I want to start my Mat leave as early as I can. I've also got 7.5 weeks annual leave, to take first, which means my last shift there will be in 4 weeks time!!! :o

I then had a huge panic whilst trying to calculate my Mat pay and though I wouldn't get anything from them because I haven't paid National Insurance with them.... however I think I've worked out I earn enough to qualify for NI benefits, but don't quite earn enough to actually pay NI.
I really hope I'm right. The only reason I've stuck with the job for 3 years is the get the decent Maternity benefits.
If I'm not entitled to anything then we're going to struggle to pay the bills and I'll have to go back to work within a couple of months.

I'm hopeful though that I can now look forward to a lovely summer working 3 days a week on the job I love, and spending some quality time with DD before she starts school full time and LO arrives.

I agree about bonding - with DD I was singing her songs and pondering my bump on the bath. This one, poor baby, is neglected already - I barely even think about it, am so busy working and chasing round after DD - especially now the sickness and awful tiredness has gone I often am surprised to remember that I am actually pregnant.

However s/he is starting to give me little prods (I am pretty sure its the baby at least) and make his/her presence felt which is nice! I think once I start getting full on kicks I will feel like I have two children not one.

Morning all

How is everyone today? I am feeling in a much better mood this morning had some nice movements last night, finished my book and got a lift all the way to London by DH this morning rather than having to get the train (he was also working in town too so not really a big effort for him!) it took three hours but I got to finish my book . I also have a fairly relaxing day at work (I am sure I have forgotten something but hey I'll stress about it later).

Well done on the email Bilblio, can't believe you finish so soon! I am willing September to come! DS starts nursery in September and I'm a bit worried about him thinking he is being thrown out when the twins come so I called them yesterday and we are going to do some trial sessions together and then if we don't think he will cope well with leaving when the twins come we will defer it until January so he is ok - I can't believe he is old enough to go to nursery!

Thanks, all, for your responses - I feel much better knowing that I'm not destined to be a heartless monster of a mother just because I'm not feeling the pink cloud at the moment

Bilblio, congrats on your early escape! :)

well i worked out today that my last shift at work will be 23rd sept which is 18 weeks on monday and won't be going back till 16th july 2012 at the earliest

I think I am going to finish on the 2nd September maybe a bit later depending on how the scans all go later on and how working from home works. I think I am going to think about heading back after easter next year.

I just had the funniest sensation like one of the babies was running across the front of my tummy it was like when your tummy rumbles but from right to left rather than centrally. Was very odd like I was being tickled from the inside.