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Original poster

My husband died today

237 replies

bloodywhitecat · 27/02/2022 21:31

Five years to the day after moving here to be with me, on my son's 30th birthday my wonderful DH died.

He had had cancer, a stroke then the daft bugger broke his leg, he was so determined the cancer wouldn't get him despite it having a 3% survival rate and he was doing well until a massive stroke hit and all treatment was off. He died early this morning and spent most of the day here, in our home, surrounded by family doing family things. It was just me and him when he died, he looked for me one last time and I held him as he took his last breath, I told him he was loved and that his daughter was coming to see him today. For the first time in weeks he looked free, no pain, no disability from the stroke just calmness.

OP posts:
contactornotthatisthequestion · 27/02/2022 22:49

as soon as i saw the title i knew that it would be you unforunately. ive been lurking on your posts for quite a while now
may i say how sorry i am for yours and your families loss, i cant even begin to understand how you must feel
it was clear to see in your posts just how much love you all had for each other

Begonias · 27/02/2022 22:49

So sorry for your loss Flowers

Dibbydoos · 27/02/2022 22:50

Sending you a big hug.

When my hubby died, I couldn't do anything. I felt like I was at the bottom of a well, and everything was going on at the top of the well. I couldn't hear or see.

And I know you will feel you have no future too, which is a really hard feeling to deal with. I just kept telling myself that I did have a future I just needed to write in. 6 years on, and I still haven't formulated my future, but I'm here and doing well.

No ones have understands just how awful it is until they've been through it.

If people offer you help, please accept it.

Be kind to yourself. If you want a lie in, have one. If you don't need to go to work, don't go.

If you can find counselling access it, even if you cant talk about your DH.

Im not going to say stay strong, you shoulfmt be strong, cry and let it all out.

Your DH will be with you for a few days, mine was I knew exactly when he left.

Bless you and the family xxx

SoupDragon · 27/02/2022 22:51

Flowers so sorry to hear this.

DramaAlpaca · 27/02/2022 22:51

I also guessed it would be you @bloodywhitecat. I'm so very sorry for your loss Flowers

doodleygirl · 27/02/2022 22:52

I’m so sorry, sending you my prayers Flowers

GodspeedJune · 27/02/2022 22:52

So very sorry for your loss.

It sounds like you both had a wonderful relationship.

RaininSummer · 27/02/2022 22:52

I am sorry to read this.

GucciBear · 27/02/2022 22:53

You are in my prayers.

Onlythelaundryfairy · 27/02/2022 22:53

I'm so sorry. Flowers

caringcarer · 27/02/2022 22:55

Sounds like he will finally be at rest now. Just try to focus on the wonderful love you shared. Beautiful memories never fade.

LIZS · 27/02/2022 22:56

I'm so sorry Thanks

user1471439310 · 27/02/2022 22:57

I am so for your loss.🙏🙏

saraclara · 27/02/2022 22:57

Another one who has followed your story. I'm so sad for you. But I'm glad he was at home with you when he died. My condolences to you, and to his children. Extra tough to lose a parent on one's birthday, and I'm sorry his daughter didn't get there in time.

I hope you have people to support you.

Shuttheblinds · 27/02/2022 22:57

I have followed your threads about your DH and the love you had for him shone through in your writing. I am so sorry for your loss, it is heartbreaking and life is so unfair. Sending love to you and your family.

PortalooSunset · 27/02/2022 22:58

I'm so sorry @bloodywhitecat. Sending you and yours loads of love Flowers

PurpleFlower1983 · 27/02/2022 23:00

I am so sorry for your loss xx

FantasticFebruary · 27/02/2022 23:03

I'm so very sorry. I've been on all your threads (under various name changes). Like others have said, from the way you write it was so easy to feel your love for each other & your fosterlings. I'm so very glad you were able to get him home and, as always, you were there when he looked for you.

Try to focus on the good memories 🌹

We're all here for you 😘xx

OystercatchersPaddling · 27/02/2022 23:04

I’m very sorry @bloodywhitecat Flowers You write about him with such love, I’ve followed you for a while. Sending best wishes and love to you and your family xxxx

Andouillette · 27/02/2022 23:06

I haven't been a member here for long but your posts, bloodywhitecat, caught my attention and I wanted to send you my deepest sympathies and love. Your lovely husband is at peace and now you must look after yourself as you so thoroughly deserve after everything you have been through.
I can only hope that if I ever find myself in a similar situation I can muster up even a fraction of the grace, dignity, courage and love that you have shown in your posts.

SRS29 · 27/02/2022 23:07

Beautiful words....Flowers

Floppy234 · 27/02/2022 23:09

So sorry for your loss xxxx

myrtleWilson · 27/02/2022 23:11

Am so sorry @bloodywhitecat - your love for your DH was apparent in every post. Do you still have the little ones with you? Am sending all my love

Purplepeoniesdroppingpetals · 27/02/2022 23:13

Ah @bloodywhitecat I’m so very sorry for your loss. You sounded like such a loving team and I wish you much love and strength.

WannabeSurfer · 27/02/2022 23:13

So sorry for your loss. I hope in time you can find comfort about, as you so beautifully wrote, he is free of pain and suffering and that he was able to be at home.