My DH has died in a car crash today.

[Iwant2move]

Is anyone up?

I can’t sleep.

My husband was killed in a car crash today.

We’d just moved house and he was so happy.

Iwant2move I am really sorry that you are stuck in this difficult position. In my case the funeral director passed me the interim death certificates, I assume he picked them up with the other paperwork but I did have a contact name and number at the Coroner's Office. I rang the car insurers and informed them when I eventually thought about it, there was no problem there. My husband died at the end of October and I've just finished the probate application today (still with an interim death certificate)

If you are too old for WAY (under 50 and widowed) then you'd fall into Way Up as they are a group for the over 50s.

As soon as you get a death certificate, I would advise you to apply for the Bereavement Support payment as I found that was processed pretty quickly and was the first money that I had come in. It moved faster than any of his pension schemes. You can go into a JobCentre and have your certificates copied so that you don't need to send them off which was good because I had six copies of the death certificate but only one marriage certificate.

I have just reached the stage where there is nothing else that I can do without probate. I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that it's all sunshine and roses a month further down the line from where you are now. It isn't but it is slightly less brutal some of the time.

PM me if there is anything I can help you with.

Icouldbeknitting
Thank you.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
It is hitting really hard today. My sons are the only reason I keep going. Every second feels like an eternity.

I'm so very sorry to hear this.
What a shock!!

Hello Iwant2move,
my husband died on 2nd Dec. We have 4 children including one still at school. He had a brain tumour but it was still a shock as he was very fit and healthy. We had to wait for a coroner's report too but that has come through now. It is very difficult organising a funeral and trying to think about Christmas as well. There is so much to do, it is overwhelming. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

This thread has made me so sad 😭
So so sorry for your loss OP 💐

We have the tree up now but if I hear one more advertising jingle about "best Christmas ever" I will lose it totally. This year Christmas day for me is on the same level as the funeral, it's something I have to get through by ticking off the hours. Hopefully it will also be like the funeral in that it won't be as bad as I fear.

I'm thinking of all of you in the same position, we will get through this terrible time because what other choice do we have?

I’m so sorry for those of you going through this too.
Please take care of yourselves. The stress took it’s toll late Wednesday afternoon and I was taken to hospital with a suspected heart attack. Fortunately, I am okay. It was the stress manifesting itself physically. My GP practice is wonderful and I am being well taken care off.
My poor sons thought they were going to lose both parents in less than a fortnight.
The coroner released the interim death certificates and they had spelled my husband’s name incorrectly. They’ve also set an inquest date for April 2017???
Everything that can go wrong, seems to be going wrong at the moment.

Iwant2move that must have been terrifying for all of you. I know that it feels that everything goes wrong and the universe is against us but it's a thing called confirmation bias, it's where we look for things that back up how we feel. You may not notice the nine things that went right but will see the one that went wrong. I'm having to be very firm with myself at the moment because I also feel that everything is going wrong here. Yes, the usually reliable car let me down BUT it was on the drive not in the dark at the back of beyond. Yes, we had an incident with the loft ladder but no-one was hurt.

One day we will have things to look forward to and joy in our lives again, we just have to hang on until that day comes.

So sorry that you have this incompetence on top of your tragic loss OP.
You’d think they would be extra careful not to add more stress to the
load wouldn’t you.

Flowers for all the bereaved here

iwant2move
I'm so sorry to hear you are struggling. It's ironic that the most stressful things need sorting when we are at our lowest eb
At my dad's inquest his address was incorrect. They said they couldn't change it as that was the address given to them
It wasn't even similar to his address. I wasn't letting it go and eventually they changed the report to the correct address.
And as for Vodafone, I won't even go there!!!
I hope you and your sons can comfort each other⚘⚘

I'm so sorry - it sounds so impotent in the face of such deep loss. I've been thinking about you and your family a lot today.

I don't think widowed and young (Way) will turn you away if you're just over 50. Think it's the commonality of experience.
My understanding it was formed as younger widowed have quite a different experience of loved ones' deaths eg mourning someone who may have quite young kids and have parents still alive. Someone I know who was widowed followkng an rta said it kept him sane when the world no longer made sense.

If you have younger kids winston's Wish are excellent in supporting kids/families.

Sending you love from me in Wiltshire

X

Hi. I was widowed in 2013 and have two dc who are still under 10. I am sorry for your loss and really feel for you are at the start of the journey we have been on for the last 4.5 years.

WAY is for people widowed before their 51st birthday but there are other groups, like Merry Widows and Young, Widowed and Facing the Future Together on Facebook that would provide you with online support. I found WAY by googling 'support for young widows' and haven't looked back. Being in contact with other people who totally understand what you are going through is priceless. I hope your friends and family will be as supportive as mine have been, but there are still likely to be times when they simply can't understand what you are going through in the way that other widows and widowers can.