"Too Beautiful for Earth" For Sylvie-Rose and all our Angel Children

[chipmonkey]

For my darling Sylvie-Rose, taken from us just seven weeks after you were born. Too beautiful for this earth but I so wish you could have stayed nonetheless.
And for all the Mums walking this tough path. Let us link arms along the way and not be defeated by the cruel blow life has dealt us.

Well, he has now been enrolled on a five-day revision course over Easter. Thing is, I think the guys in dh's family are just like this, dh took the most roundabout way of getting a degree, but when he did get it, he graduated 3rd in his class. Both of his brothers were rubbish in school but got degrees years later. But it is so very frustrating.

I am watching Sport Relief , it is so heartbreaking , all of those children .....

All those mothers walking this shitty path .

Me too. You can see the pain too visibly in the parents' eyes. But feeling mad (selfishly) too. Our children had access to top-notch healthcare, and did not have any of the challenges these children do, yet they still died...

tw :(

DS has gone to Cornwall with his GF. I know he's an adult, and he has his own place, so why do I worry every time he goes off somewhere?

I know ....

That sound of that mother , I recognise it and wish I didn't .

I can't stop watching it , but maybe I should .

tw if it's going to bring you down, then maybe you should, I have to admit I couldn't face watching it xx

miasmummy (((hugs))) xx

Watching it too. Heart did a lurch when he said 'can you imagine watching your child die....' all I could think is 'I have!' Heartbreaking

On a lighter note what the f*@k is Davina wearing?!

me too whatever , I wanted to shout at him

And yes , all those bloody feathers must be a bit warm under the lights .

I know tw

and this makes me an awful person, but all this focus on other countries, and I know the mortality rate is so much higher and so preventable, I know charity drives like this are necessary. But I can't helping thinking that nobody notices that so many babies and children die every day in this country too. :(

When he said you can't imagine taking your child home from hospital to bury them.. I actually said out loud, oh yes I can John Bishop.

I agree Caz , I am going to be bed for a wallow and a wee sob .

It is just shit , I agree that this money needs to be raised and it is bloody unfair , 1 in 5 don't make it to 5 there but for now all I can think about is my boy that didn't make it .

Bollocks !

Caz and Tw yep, I said I could imagine it too when John said that. As for the 24 hours part - it was less than 6 hours for my beautiful Mia... How is that possible?!? Think I might need to turn over.

I agree Caz it probably makes me a terrible person but I always wonder where all the money goes every year, comic relief, sports relief, children in need but it never seems to make any difference.

I'm going to a Sands fundraiser tomorrow so that's where my money is going.

OK so effing DH turned it over for a few seconds. It was sad when the little boy died (from malaria & pneumonia), but - and this proves that for the first time in my life I'm an evil bitch - I didn't actually get too upset, though 'D'H did (which feels like a betrayal) Then seeing Davina crying... aww poor thing . DH turned it over when JLS came on.

whatever I don't know of any SANDS fundraisers around here (to be honest I don't go on SANDS as much as I probably should). I have bought a load of the yellow bracelets, the teardrop/baby badges, and pens for my family & friends, but I got those from their online shop. I'd love to do some fundraising for them. 17 babies are stillborn, in the UK each day, how shocking & disgraceful is that? 17 ruined families, 17 babies who never fulfil their potential.

I've meant to ask (but it seemed so insensitive), when Tamsin died we only got a certificate of stillbirth, yet others (who've had stillbirths) have said that they registered the birth & death of their babies (babies born sleeping), which has upset me a bit, as we never did that - just a certificate of stillbirth (looks just like birth certificate, with our names on, but it had 'stillbirth' instead of 'birth'.

Tami they tend to be arranged by the local groups rather than on a national scale. The one tomorrow has been organised by one of the couples from our local group in memory of their dd Jessica who was born sleeping at 41 weeks a year ago on Sunday.

The whole group has helped put it together we wrote to lots of businesses and have had a really great response for raffle prizes and an auction. We're doing a balloon release and there food/drink and a DJ etc. I think lots of people are willing to donate to SANDS once they know what they do but they just haven't heard of them. The memory boxes in the hospital cost sands £10 to put together so I always say by donating £10 you are giving a bereaved parent the gift of previous memories. Caz had a fantastic event for Belle's first birthday - she raised an incredible amount. Erin's first birthday falls on the Saturday of August bank holiday weekend so I'd like to do something then to raise for Sands and CLIC Sargeant (children's cancer charity).

I'm not sure on the certificates honey as Erin was a live birth we had no choice but to register her birth and death. To be honest it was harrowing as we had to go to the local registry office which was full of excited couples with their newborns

Whatever, that is inhumane that you had to register Erin's birth with all the excited new parents around. I had to register Sylvie-Rose's birth when she was still tiny and in hospital and even at that I was envious of the couples who had their baby with them. When ds1 was born, the hospital registered the birth for you and I think now, it's better that they did.

We've stopped watching sport relief. Not before I've written a little piece on my blog though and tweeted it to John Bishop and the BBC! Not that they'll take any notice though. DH didn't want it on anymore. It is so difficult seeing those parents hearts break just like ours.

tami where have you got the impression that some parents have been able to obtain a birth and death certificate for their child? I've not heard anyone say this about certificates before, here or on Sands. I'm sure, or at least was under the impression, that the law only allows for a certificate of stillbirth if there are no signs of life at birth. That's what we've got for Belle anyway. Identical to Xander's apart from that one word at the top. Born sleeping is just a gentler way of saying stillbirth.

whatever aww thanks :) it was a fantastic event, I'm so glad we did something so amazing for her first birthday. The final figure was over £9600 - we are currently edging closer and closer to 10k! Determined to get there by her 2nd birthday! Amazing what my little girl is doing!

Hope your event tomorrow is brilliant too xx

Morning xx

you dont get a birth certificate unless baby draws breath after birth..if they do then no matter how long your darling child lives you get birth and death certificate .
if your child is born asleep you only get a certificate of still birth.. which you still have to bloody register... why cant they do the paperwork for you ...

cax thats "interesting" that your stillbirth certificate and birth certificates are almost the same. We have 2 completely different documents, our stillbirth certificate is liked an old fashioned doc and is all filled in by hand . Ross's birth certificate is computer generated. They must have updated the stillbirth register since we lost Fraser

Tami.. 17 babies a day in the uk are stillborn or die shortly after birth.. they are not all stillborn.

I dont understand why this figure doesnt get more press. I have said several times if 17 kids a day were dying of anything else there would be lurid headlines and mass panic

Stupid question ..if your baby lives for a little while do you have to go to the registry office with both certificates..that must be a nightmare

Both of my certificates are computer generated fm - almost feels a shame, I think the old fashioned hand written certificates have a certain something about them.

Caz, I think that too! Ds1 and ds2's birth certs are handwritten and look so much more special. The other three are nice enough and I suppose there are less likely to be errors to do with bad handwriting. Just think, our grandchildren may never see a handwritten birth cert.

Feeling a bit better about ds1 and annoyed with myself for getting upset. After all, the child is alive and well, he has his whole life to live and loads of time to "find himself" I have to remember that he's not me.

Yes fm you do. It was incredibly hard, you have to sit through the 'normal' register of birth interview then as soon as it's printed and signed you have to then answer all the same questions for the death certificate. It was horribly horribly hard I sobbed throughout the whole thing we went in about 5 days after she was born and did it Just awful.

Really, whatever, that should be changed.

All mine are handwritten except for Toms birth certificate and Matts death certificate. Just noticed on the twins birth certificates there is the time of their birth - my Mum said that always goes on in the case of a multiple birth.