Immense baby name regret

[SLNM]

Baby is 3 months old, and I have started to regret her name. We named her Desiree (which is a name that DH had suggested). It is mainly the comments of others that are causing my regret. When we go to the shops, we get reactions that seem negative when someone asks what her name is. My parents do not like her name. I want to change her name but am not certain that I will be able to convince DH. It doesn't help that she is likely to be our only child (which only makes the regret stronger).

We had considered Isabel, Jacqueline, Lucy, and Scarlett as well, but DH wasn't as keen on those as I was. What would you do?

call her Ray for short?

This is true, but 'desi' in this context just means Asian person, South-Asian, people refer to themselves as this, like 'my parents are so desi' type thing, it's within communities.

I don't think that Desi, or Desiree as a name, would carry the same connotation at all. You could tie yourself in knots with this stuff- I mean people didn't call babies 'Maddie' for years because of Madeline McCann and so on.

Good that the OP knows everything though because it sounds like she needs to have a full and frank conversation with her husband.

Personally I think Desi Joy is adorable, but it's her who has to has to live with it. Joy is also a lovely name although again I knew a Joy who was so unjoyous it was untrue. Whatever you choose, there's always a chance the name will either not fit or change in meaning. Choose what you like and have a great middle name for this reason.

Desiree is a beautiful name. It is the name you and your husband love and it’s the name you chose for your beautiful baby daughter. You shouldn’t let anyone impact the way you feel about that.

I know a Desiree. I have known her since childhood and she is now a young woman with children of her own. She is as gorgeous inside and out as her name and owns it fully. She usually goes by Des or Desi for short, and I’ve never heard anyone say a negative word about it. As someone grows up, they embody their name. Your daughter will do the same.

Would you use Joy?

I think it's fine. There's loads of Scarletts and Isobels and Lucy's at the moment, so she'll benefit from having a less common name. If you really want to change it, Jacqueline is very pretty, but it sounds like you've just been unlucky with some weird responses. It's not a weird name, people will get used to it very quickly and will only think of it as her name. If you both like it, stick with it and in a few years you and everyone you know will have so many happy moments of things Desiree did or Desiree said that you'll probably forget anything but the lovely little girl the name represents.

This. Change if you are that uncomfortable with it. I quite like Desiree though.

I really like Desiree, but only if it's pronounced properly. Emphasis on the Des with a soft i, like 'it' but without the 't' and ree pronounced as 'ray'

Des -i- ray.

Not Des ear ree, said to rhyme with beery.

yes although I wouldn’t let it put me off Desiree as a name, I have a long uncommon name with lots of nickname potential but everyone calls me by my proper name. You don’t have to have a nickname

Not gonna lie @SLNM that is a terrible name for a child. It kind of sounds like a stripper name. I'm so sorry to be rude, but I just thought stripper as soon as I read the name. I would definitely change it.

Out of all the names you mentioned I would pick Lucy. Not Jacqueline, that will get shortened to Jackie - by everyone! You are getting negative reactions because people are thinking 'stripper.' It means 'desirable' and 'longed for' romantically, (in French) and does have negative connotations. No-one is going to think of a female comedian that 99.99 % of people have never heard of!

Change it! Your daughter will thank you.

I love it!!! Think it’s really cool!!!

I haven't read the whole post, but there was a kids movie about Raya and the dragon, so she can always go by Reya for a bit for some Disney warrior princess vibes.

Désirée is a beautiful respectable old French name, people calling it American are just showing their lack of culture. 'Desirer' the verb doesn't exactly mean to desire as it does in English, it's more like to wish for, children called Désiré(e) are wanted children, traditionally. Désirée Clary was Napoleon's first love interest and then went on to marry one of his marshalls (Bernadotte) and became queen of Sweden. She lived a long and remarkable life.

'Lack of culture' PMSL. Behave. 😂 Literally NO-ONE is going to have heard of that woman connected to Napolean (that you have just found on Google.)

Scarlett is lovely. Big fan of the character in Four Weddings and a Funeral. Not sure how common it is though. NDN’s babies are called Tabitha and Zola on both sides. Tabs for short for Tabitha. My SIL’s cousin’s almost 2 year old is Lola.

I love Desiree. There’s something so present about it. Much prefer it to Jacqueline. Joy is great as well. My DC have got very traditional ‘British’ names, but I can really appreciate Desiree.

I have a good friend named Desirée. She and her siblings all have French names due to their French heritage so it has never occurred to me to consider it American! She is anything but 'chavvy', a very classy lady who is just delightful and very glamorous.
I think it's a lovely name, I much prefer it to Jacqueline, and would stick with it. Diminutive forms will probably evolve as she gets older so Desi/Dezi/Daisy or any other variant might be her preference, or might not.
I think having a wobble on the final baby name of choice is natural but take heart from the people on here who love it!

I'm sorry but I think it's awful.
That said people are very rude if they actually tell you so!
I would think chavvy / black american / british kids trying to be "gangsta" too.
Joy is absolutely lovely, can you just call her by her middle name?

In a Swedish book called Benny and Shrimp by Katherina Mazzeti, the lead character is called Desiree and even she has issues with it. I’d worry it was shortened to Des which is a male nickname for Dennis.

I love Joy too. Family friend is called that.

Bit shocked by the number of people who seem to think white people shouldn’t use names that are apparently more popular amongst Black people. It’s a name ffs!

Why did DH like Desiree? Is he French or part?

I wouldn’t say the OP ‘shouldn’t’ but she should be aware of it.

I’m sat here trying to picture your average British kid trying to be gangster being called Desiree and I just can’t lol all the ones I know are jack, Daniel, Ellie, William etc just normal names.

In fact the only Desiree I know is a stay at home mum who likes gardening and reading.

It can come off as a bit strange though. It’s like Aaliyah the deceased singer, I personally would be surprised at a white girl having this name. But that’s just me. Not for any reason though. Maybe there are white girls with it as a name, I don’t know.

I don't love the name, but I certainly don't hate it - and if you love it, that really is all that matters.

Rae/Ray, Des and Daisy are all great diminutives, too. I know two women that call themselves Ray and they are both ace.