Immense baby name regret

[SLNM]

Baby is 3 months old, and I have started to regret her name. We named her Desiree (which is a name that DH had suggested). It is mainly the comments of others that are causing my regret. When we go to the shops, we get reactions that seem negative when someone asks what her name is. My parents do not like her name. I want to change her name but am not certain that I will be able to convince DH. It doesn't help that she is likely to be our only child (which only makes the regret stronger).

We had considered Isabel, Jacqueline, Lucy, and Scarlett as well, but DH wasn't as keen on those as I was. What would you do?

These comments are disgusting. Enjoy reading your daily mail and stop being so judgemental, you come across as someone horribly entitled and unpleasant

I like Desiree but it is not at all common. I have heard the name before but not met one. It means desirable one if that helps. Does she have a middle name abd would you feel comfortable calling her that. I knew a girls whose grandparents refused to use her first name so they called her by her middle name and it stuck, all through school she went by her middle name, it wasn't until she went to uni she started using her first name. If you really don't like it talk to your husband, choose a name you both like.

Thank you, I made the point about class and race upthread.

A member of our family didn't like our DD's name, but she admitted it at a later stage and said 'now I've got used to it, I like it'. Although, it's a name I've always liked and DH readily agreed, it then became clear it was the most popular name that year and I had the feeling from the way some people reacted, that it was a case of 'oh no, not another one'.

I'd say ignore others, it's a nice name and I can well imagine a little girl being called it. Fast forward, 25 years, I'm still happy with the name we gave DD. DD hasn't changed or shortened it, despite really liking her middle name.

Is you continue to have doubts, is there a shortened version you could go for, looking at the options they're Dessie, Des, Rae, Ree, Dessa, Dessie, Rire, Ezzie, Zizi. If not, would her middle name work for you.

She says that her and her husband both like the name. The child's middle name is Joy.

I love it

Desiree is way nicer than Jaqueline

I know a girl, Raye, not sure if it was short for anything else but I always thought her name was really cool.

I think your daughter has some beautiful nicknames with her name here.

Desiree is lovely but feels very grown up/ glamourous woman to me, which might be why people are finding it hard to use for a small baby. I'd start trying a nickname day to day before changing her whole name.

Jacqueline is beautiful but has similar issues that it is a lot to use day to day- she'd probably still need to be Jack or Jackie even then.

it does feel like a name that would be less common in a white British family. I think Desi is a terrible idea for a nickname as it means things from the Indian subcontinent so also doesn’t fit.

I think the fact you aren’t comfy with it at this point says a lot, so swap it.

It's whether you and your husband like it that's important. Names go in and out of fashion, you can't predict how your DDs name will be viewed by others in 10, 20, 50 years' time.

No one of my age had my name when I was born in the early 1970s, it was deeply unfashionable. Now I'm always hearing it shouted by parents to their young DC when I am out and about!

A white British family?
I'm in Yorkshire, but one of the most popular under 5s name is Aoife. Niamh and Saoirse are also common. It's not the 50s. People choose different names.

I would change the name asap. I don’t understand why you let your DH have the final say in the first place.

See, as long as you raise your daughter with better manners than Aussie, people will come to love the name cos it's associated with your daughter.

People are rude! If you love the name then have the courage to own it. I actually like it - and the way you pronounce it gives lots of options for shortening the name. As it's three syllables it will get shortened. I think I'd be calling her Ray or as a baby, Ray-Ray which is cute (I think!) Also very cool name at the moment with the huge success of the singer Rae.

Have faith in your choice and enjoy your little baby. Try not to give a about what other people think, their noise is not important.

I think you should change it. Tbh it's pretty dire. But that's only my opinion. A lot of people on this thread like it. So it's up to you.

DH heard Desiree for the first time whilst on holiday and never forgot it. Joy is my mum's name.

It’s not rude it’s helpful. Like when Richard Madeley did Ali G. If I’d been there I’d have said Rich you plonker don’t be so bloody silly.

That's lovely. It'll work out with her name. Seriously. I've been a secondary school teacher for many years, I've come across hundreds of different names! It's fine and if other people are rude, racist or clasist - just tell them!

If I asked your baby's name and you said Desiree, I would probably say something like "Oh that's unusual" or something like that, because it is, not because it's not a nice name. It's perfectly fine. It's funny that it's the only name in the whole world your husband likes!

I always think, could you imagine the Speaker of the House with the name? And actually I could! Because babies grow into adults with often serious careers. They are not cute pets. When names like Blossom, Flower and Apple get discussed on MN as serious choices for a human child, rather than a rabbit, I just cringe.

Rae or Desi are good shortened forms. I'm Rachel, but my whole family call me Rae. It would be so odd for them to call me Rachel.

If you like it stick with it.

Absolutely stick to your guns then. I'd be upset about your parents reaction to the name as you said they disliked it. Was your mum pleased you'd used her name as a middle name?

It's not a bad name. I've only met one Desiree who was French. It actually took me ages to realise that's what her name was as the way she said it sounded like Daisy-Ray with a French accent. I like it said like that but I think in the UK you'll get a lot of people pronouncing it Duh-Zeer-Ay which doesn't sound as nice and will annoy you as that's not your chosen pronunciation.

Would your husband consider changing it to Daisy? I like your other choices too.

I believe in the original French it translates to much longed for/desired. This is supposition @SLNM so please forgive the intrusion but if this is to be your only baby and you've waited a long time for her, the name seems very appropriate.

There was a singer called Desiree (who performed as Des'ree) back in the day. If you haven't heard of her (you were perhaps being born when her biggest hit You Gotta Be came out in 1994 😀) maybe have a listen. It's a lovely soulful, positive, uplifting song.

Yes, but they’re widely mispronounced by the people using them!

Stick to the chosen name which Imo is a lovely name.
I'm amazed that you are thinking of changing based on other's reactions.

It will definitely be mispronounced as De-zeer-ay by most British people, be prepared to correct them forever. If you can cope with that, carry on.