Can I register our baby without my husbands agreement?

[Floam6]

My husband and I have a new baby. However we aren’t in a great place and are likely to separate for various reasons. We cannot agree on the baby’s name and I would like to go ahead and register her but wondered if I am able to do this legally and what the repercussions are? Thank you

Can you share your names and his suggestions as well? We might be able to come up with something else that neither of you have thought of but will both love. This is the baby naming topic after all.

If he doesn't like any of the names on your short list, and you don't like any of the names on his short list, you need to find another name you both think is OK.

Neither of you will get your favourite name, but you should choose a name both of you are OK with.

Are your names are bit off the wall or weird spellings? I do think some of this is dependent on what the names are you actually like. Or is it just that you

Thanks Belle. Happy to, although I have looked a lot and know my favourites but I know I will need to compromise.

my favourites:

Phoebe - (Bee/Bea) I have always loved it and think she looks like one
Clara
Sophie
Lucy

His favourites:

Clarissa
Fleur
Danielle
Beatrice (I don’t hate it and it could be Bea, but I see Beetroot/Beat-rice)
Madeleine
Grace
Robyn
Juliette
Delphine

Your top 3 names are just 3 names out of hundreds and thousands. He doesn't like them, so they're off the table (as are his choices you don't like). Stop dwelling on those 3 names, and work together to find a name you both like.

I’d probably tell him you are separating and that you are naming your child Phoebe with Bea as a nickname as a compromise to his name choice of Beatrice. However, as before, he can go to court and raise a case for a judge to make a decision if necessary.

How old is baby? If you still have a few weeks left to decide I'd let things settle a few days then have a calm sit down proper discussion about it.

I don't think your styles are far apart tbh. His are perhaps a bit frillier than yours, but they're mainly quite classic names. Clara/Clarissa is an obvious point of agreement, as Bea (Pheobe/Beatrice).

How about
Sophia
Lucinda
Juliet
as variations of the chosen names that might suit each others style?

Or how about
Felicity
Helena
Eleanor
Susanna
Flora

You have two names in both lists that are similar.

Phoebe but nicknamed Bea, Beatrice nicknamed Bea - is Beatrix an alternative?

Clara or Clarissa, they are very similar names anyway. Clarissa is a timeless classic, Clara is a more modern version of it.

Regardless of marital issues, your DD is also his DD and he does have a right to name his child too. I do totally understand the fact you grew and birthed her though!

My youngest DC has a name I didn't love, but we really struggled on names for weeks after DC was born and I had to compromise.

My late father in law registered my husband on his own. He was as pissed as a fart and saddled him with a really awful name. My mother in law and husband resented him for doing it for as long as he lived.

It won't, unless he is a complete Twat

Why don't you just call her Bea if that is going to be her 'nickname' anyway

That way he 'wins' with a short version of one of his names and you get to call her the name you were always going to call her anyway.

In other matters how the fuck did chat GTP come up with Delphine and Danielle!?

What about using Clarissa but known as Clara. Its a shortening of Clarissa anyway.

Thanks all. I really don’t like Clarissa sadly. It feels much harsher and less pretty than Clara so that is out. I asked him if we could name her Phoebe but call her Bea/Bee as a compromise for Beatrice/Beatrix but he didn’t want to do that either. I do prefer Sophie to Sophia (and I think she looks much more like a Sophie), but I will suggest Sophia to him.

Just a thought if you are gonna be separating give baby your maiden name surely? Unless you are gonna keep the married name then you'll have different names

So your choices are quite soft and classic whereas his choices seem more elegant and continental. If it helps, all of the names on both your lists are nice.

How about some of the following new choices:

Juliana (bridge between Sophie/Clara and Juliette)
Cora (similar to Clara)
Eleanor (soft but elegant)
Eloise
Camilla or Camille (Millie for short)
Rosalie (Rosie)
Tabitha (a name that produces “Bea” as a nickname that is not Phoebe or Beatrice)

Sophia is beautiful.

I did wonder if we go with one of his names as first name, with Phoebe as her middle name and I just call her Phoebe/Bee still but I think that would be confusing for her and others and annoy my husband.

Norah?

What about some other names that aren't versions of your 4 favourite names that you posted?

Take those names (and his names) completely off the table and start again?

Or are you only prepared to accept your 4 favourites or version of them? Because if so, it's you that isn't compromising.

What about Alice or Alicia?

If you think there is a chance of seperation definitely double barrell the surname with yours first, so you can drop it.

Any decent man knows that a woman should have great sway with names.

He sounds awful.
Protect yourself.
Register her.

I might be in the minority and am preparing to get flamed but I say stick to your guns and say her name is Pheobe Beatrice, which is a fair compromise, and you're happy to even call her Bea as a nickname, but that's it and the matter is closed. I do think the mum's view - having literally grown and birthed the child - counts for more than an unsupportive husband who is on the brink of leaving you when you have a tiny new baby. Call her Pheobe OP. And congrats on your new baby.

My father registered my name without my mother, but he was a horrible, abusive man. He gave me two middle names that were relatives of his. My mother left him a few years later and I have came to hate both middle names so much I never bothered to learn how to pronounce them properly (they are unusual names).

What a horrible man he is. He is deliberately upsetting you after you have just given birth and is insisting on choosing your baby's first name and surname. That simply isn't fair. If the babyhas his surname, you should be able to choose the first name. Go and register the baby yourself and do just that.

First name Beatrice, second name Clara? Looks like you are compromising, but you still get to call her Bee. Congratulations on your baby.

The obvious compromise (from your list and his) is Beatrice on the birth certificate, to be known as Bea.