support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities

[katiecubs]

Hi girls - i hope this becomes a useful area

Hi all,

Numpty _ hope all is going well just now. I'm hoping you get the pregnancy you want and it all gois as smooth as possible (and as pain free) xxx

Waffy, so sorry to hear what you re going through just now - my advice would echo what the others are saying, contact EPU. I will be thinking of you. xxx

Hi Kittens, I understand very well (as everyone on here will) the range of emotions you are going through. I felt more content when I was angry as when I cried I thought I would never stop! I'm sorry to hear that your mum is caught up in her own things at the moment and I hope you have got people around you that you can talk (cry) to. You know that we are all here and thinking of you all the time. It is unbelievable that this thread can become such an important part of day to day life but it has and it's a great place to off load and share experiences. xxx

Hello to everyone else, hope your all okay x

Kittens, the bad days are so normal. You are coping remarkably well, and it's good to let the tears flow every now and then, and also find a way to release the anger. I find that I no longer feel angry very often, but when I do it's all consuming. And my mum is exactly the same, she never acknowledged what I went through. And she never will, I know this.

Crazycat, yes, it was uncomfortable yesterday and I had to lie down most of the afternoon. Nothing serious, just some dizzy spells. No wonder your dd couldn't sleep, poor thing.

I am quite pessimistic today and just think that I "must" have a miscarriage soon. Are there women who never have one? Also, dh tells me I should get in touch with the mw, but I don't think I'll do it this week. I'm only 5 weeks on Wed and would rather wait for a bit longer. Also, I hesitated with regards to an early scan, thought I'd want one but since finding out I was pregnant I changed my mind. However, now I wonder if I should have one, because I ovulated quite early in this cycle and I think I am a bit further along than my dates indicate. And I just don't want to go for my 12 week scan and find out I'm actually further along, just in case there is something wrong. If I make it this far, that is. Not sure this makes any sense.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Numpty, still keeping my fingers crossed for you (knuckles a bit white actually ).

Morning lovelies - I hope everyone enjoyed their weekends? I have to say I am melting somewhat here in London, it?s rather exhausting but I am very lucky to have finished work early so at least I don?t have to commute in on the tube anymore ? now that would be hell!

Other than suffering in the heat I am doing pretty well, started packing yesterday for our move down to Hove next week ? am very excited and can?t wait to be there, the fresh sea breeze will be very welcome.

Numpty how exciting ? keeping everything crossed it all kicks off properly for you soon and you have a nice ?easy? (is there such a thing?!) labour, can?t wait to hear about the new arrival

Waffy hello and welcome to our thread. I can only echo what the others have said and get down to the EPU at your local hospital ? much quicker than going through the doctors. I really hope everything is ok, bleeding in early pregnancy is pretty common so don?t give up hope x

Kittens, lovely to hear from you ? am so glad you were able to update as we have all been thinking of you a lot. I?m sorry you have not had the support you needed from your mum but know you will always find it here. Do you have much work on this week? If so I hope it is less stressful

To our newly pregnant members ? Coffee, Crazycat, Gina and LP ? how are you all feeling? Coffee sorry you had a bit of a hard time at the weekend ? how are you doing today? It?s not nice at all the limbo stage.

Allstars not long for you either now is it? I can?t remember your due date but I think you are a few weeks ahead of me. Seems to all be going quite quickly now

Lyn ? how are you doing? I hope the tranexamic acid is helping the bleeding somewhat. I did not have that particular problem but I remember waiting for ever for my first period to return ? I so just wanted my body to just get back to normal so I feel your frustration.

Lots of love to Can?t, Mishtabel and Shangrila ? it?s lovely to hear update of your LO?s and how they are growing. I imagine you are all pretty busy so your support is always so very much appreciated here.

Katie xxx

Wow busy morning on the thread - cross posted with Coffee, Lyn and Crazy, love how we are all doing our typical british moaning about the weather thing

Coffee there are women who never suffer miscarriages yes i know a couple! Believe it or not they are probably more common that ones that do. it's so hard to be optimistic i know but the odds really are on your side. If you are not sure of your dates then maybe an early scan would be a good idea after all? As you say you wouldn't want to be too far out for your 12 week scan and although nerve wracking at least it provides some answers x

oh what I would do for a fresh seabreeze katie! Very exciting that the move is so close. Hope you're not too uncomfortable in this heat, it gets so oppressive in London doesn't it?

Coffee what you say about the scans does make sense, to me at least! I'm also wavering over requesting an early scan or just waiting for 12 weeks.

Haven't been the GP yet either to say I'm PG. Am 6 weeks and in total denial. This can't be healthy. It's as if I need someone else to do it for me so I don't have to acknowledge it's happening. I don't want to jinx the pregnancy by acknowledging it, IYSWIM?

I've plucked up courage to call the maternity assessment team, will need to go in later to get examined. I was a little vague about telling them the time my waters broke though, so hopefully that buys me a bit more time - I hope that doesn't sound like I'm being reckless with health of baby, but just can't see why with a 0.5% increased risk of infection (ie risk now at 1%) you have to go on IV antibiotics when the initial risk is 0.5% and no-one in normal labour would go on IV antibiotics. Because I think that means that even if I go into labour naturally, if it's over 24hrs from when waters break, baby will have to get line in, and from what I remember that's 3 lots of antibiotics intravenously over the next 1.5days.

Also have to decide whether I try and get contractions going again by going for walks, or if that will just tire me out for (sigh) when I get put on the drip. Damn it. Sorry for being so fed up, but I was dreading having to go through this again...

If you can face it Numpty I'd be tempted to get out for as brisk a walk as you can manage then come home for a shower and a nap.

You should only be given antibiotics if either you or your baby actually start showing signs of infection. They do not need to administer them as a precautionary measure - although they may be keen to. If your temperature is normal and you aren't showing any signs of infection in your urine, and baby's heartbeat is normal, you have good grounds for staying clear of that IV.

Hello ladies,

Coffee I think the first trimester is such a worry. katiecubs is right there is more chance of a healthy pregnancy than a miscarriage. I think the stats are 4/5 are healthy. Stay positive & just book in for the scan if it will help. xxx

At 6 weeks ish I had a massive melt down at work having convinced myself that the baby wouldn't have a heartbeat and so I booked a private viability scan, I had to know. I am so glad I did, it was such a relief to see the bean with its little heat beat going like the clappers. I am trying (with difficulty)to stay positive that this time everything will be fine and sending positive vibes to the bean...

katiecubs hope the move goes well! I am just up the coast from there (well an hour or so) near Bournemouth. Its been lovely with the sea breeze at the weekend!!!

Kittens I am sorry that your Mum isn't much support. I hope that you have someone in RL who can be there for you (of course as well as the ladies here). x

Waffy, I really hope that you are ok. I echo what others had said, I would go and get checked out ASAP. x

NumptyMum I really hope that things move on for you today x

I am 8+2 today, I am counting the days off one by one just hoping that all is well. I have not had any sickness as such but feeling vry naauseous and have sat at my desk "concentrating" very hard to hold down breakfast for the last hour. Also finding the heat difficult and spent much of the weekend in the shade in the garden.

Sorry for the long post! Love to all here xxx

Oh Numpty - pom-poms are working overtime for you here. I really hope things get moving again quickly for you. No useful advice (clearly a lot further on than I have ever been...) but I'm sending you calm vibes and contracting thoughts and hoping for you as hard as I can!!! Brisk walk then a nap sounded like good advice to me...

Kittens - glad you're still with us. Hope you're ok. And hope 'things' have been moving for you too so that your scan this week will come up clear. Thinking of you.

Waffy - I second all the advice on here to get yourself to the hospital today rather than wait for phone calls or booking or anything. And I really hope things are better than they seem.

As for me, I'm feeling pretty crappy. I'm trying to take that as a good sign, but I can't help thinking that I'm feeling this rubbish yet again for nothing. No good on supportive words for my fellow 1st trimester-ers I'm afraid. Short of a scan a day, nothing's going to convince me that this pregnancy is going to work. Gearing myself up for a meeting with my boss later where I really have to make it clear to him that I won't be taking on any extra work in July or August, and he'll be lucky if I even do my own. He's been very supportive and all, but he seems to have no idea at all that at best, I'll be having most of a week off in July for a CVS and results, and if anything goes wrong then he won't be seeing me again for quite some time.

Anyway, that's not nearly as important as willing on the impending thread baby! Come on little one - get pushing your way out!! The sun is shining and its time for you to join the big wide world out here. We're all routing for you. xxxxx

Sorry you're feeling crappy Poot. It's hard to cope with the nausea and tiredness when we don't have the confidence that it will be worth it in the end.

I keep trying to distract myself with work, the gym, anything, but all I really want to do is hide on the sofa and read old threads on here. Feeling quite depressed actually.

Gina you are near Bournemouth? DH and I are planning to move out of London to the coast in 2012. We've been researching areas online - Lower Parkstone, Southbourne, Littledean etc - we want to be within 20 mins walk of the beach. I remember parts of the area a bit from my childhood as my family lived in Christchurch for a while, but any pointers you have would be gratefully received! xx

Gym??!! Oh my goodness crazy lady, you're good! It's all I can do to drag my sorry ass up the stairs at work. The gym seems like a lifetime ago.... xxx

You know it's funny I completely dropped the gym with I was pregnant with DD because I felt so sick and exhausted, but this time round I'm finding being in the gym doesn't make me feel any worse, and in fact I feel quite energised afterwards! As long as I stick to low-impact - i.e. rowing rather than running or skipping, and dynamic yoga moves using the cable jungle instead of kettlebells etc...

Odd I know, but I'm trying to keep as much normality in life as possible in case it all goes tits up again, and if it doesn't, then hopefully I won't pile on the 4 stone I did with DD .

Crazycatlady we actually live in Barton on Sea so about 6/7 miles from Christchurch down the coast but I always say Bmth as no one has ever heard of BoS!! We lived in Christchurch before moving to BoS!

We love it though as its super quiet where we are and we are only one road back from the sea front and can here the waves crashing in the evenings when we sit in our garden. Its very very chilled! Depending on your budget all of those areas are ok, if you want something more relaxed out of Bmth then I can recommend Milford on Sea, Lymington and the New Forest areas around there all close to the sea and very lovely. I am a bit more of a country girl than town and so highly recommend it!!

Ahh, one of my close friends got married in Lymington. It's beautiful. I've not spent much time down that way but the last two times I have I always seem to gravitate to the Otter sanctuary. I can't resist those cute little critters!

I spent the hot weekend by the seaside too in Whitstable which was gorgeous. I'm quite jealous of all you ladies who live by the sea (or are about to, Katie) but London is where the work is for me so I will have to settle on a seaside retirement one day!

Sorry to hear you're feeling ropey LittlePoot. Have you tried ginger beer? I also found really fresh tasting zingy fruit very helpful, like pink grapefruits and nectarines.

This week is a quite one for me workwise. Typically I have been offered two days work, one on the day of my scan - which I am trying to move but am having no luck getting through to anyone, and one on my granny's 90th which I have declared a work free day in order to take her to lunch. I do have a couple of ladies coming round tomorrow for a wedding make up trial so I'd better go and clean the house!

Sorry about the me posts, I'm afraid I'm avoiding reading the pregnant posts in too much detail at the mo so hence my lack of personal messages. I am rooting for you all though. x

Havingkittens I work in Lymington so get to enjoy it every day! Lovely in the summer! x

PS good luck with the cleaning and make up trial!! x

What a busy thread today, I can?t keep up. Kittens, don?t worry about personals, just take care of yourself at the moment.

Thank you everyone for your words of support. I will write more tonight from home, but I?ve just quickly logged on to see if there is any news from Numpty ? shaking the pom poms here as well and cheering the little one on!

No news from me I'm afraid - DH and I just had a nap because we didn't sleep well last night and might (you never know) need energy for later. But I'm off to the hospital shortly so that they can confirm whether my waters have broken. And then it's a question of what I do: refuse routine drip after 24hrs and ask for monitoring, or accept drip and hope it is better than last time... Or will I go into proper labour? My body is giving no indication of it just now. I think I need MmeTracy's bootcamp (just popped over to the other thread). Perhaps this is what you get when you have a baby when older, a body that has never read the manual and hasn't a clue what to do.

Sorry just realised I'm sounding very negative... please keep waving those pom poms to keep my morale up. It's just that I would have LOVED to have continued with the contractions that started last night and I'm still so pissed off that this type of labour seems to be happening to me again... Still, got to look on the positive side, baby is still moving OK and I'm about to go to hosp so will know then whether hb is OK.

Just popping in to shake some pom poms

Numpty, hoping your silence means you are now having a lovely labour (!!) intervention-free (and painfree?).

Just remember that whatever it's like, your baby is coming very soon. So exciting, another thread baby.

Hi to everyone else. Kittens, thanks for posting and keeping us up to date. Hope you are doing okay.

Pom poms couldn't be shaking any harder. Come on shiny new baby and Numpty- you can do it! xxx

I have achy arms from shaking the pom poms all afternoon! I hope the little one won't keep us waiting too long. Good luck Numpty, keeping everything crossed! xxxx

Thinking of you Numpty. Cannot wait to hear some positive news. Hope all is well and they are not interfering too much.

Got some very funny looks dancing around the office with my pom poms today!! Hope all is going well NumptyMum xxx