To not want my kids grandparents to sleep naked with him.

[susssiq]

My kids paternal grandparents sleep naked ok fair enough thats up to them. My kids stay at theres when they babysit and sleep over. When my son wakes up early he usually gets in their bed and dozes for a while. I don't feel comfortable that they are naked then. AIBU if I ask them to at least wear underwear? and how do I ask them without offending them?

and, certainly one set of my dc's gp's don't have a close relationship with them

so maybe that is colouring my view...whole different thread there, however

Well that's interesting.

As I would be extremely and no way if my brother wanted to share a bed naked with my children. That really would be wildly inappropriate. I think I would feel the same way if I had a sister or about DHs siblings.

But GPs are our parents, they have had children ie us, fed and clothed us, changed our nappies, bathed us and raised us. We know what they are like with little children because we were those little children.

I think that makes sense! It does to me anyway.

Not to mention if it were DHs sisters - in bed with the husbands ie not even related?

I think that is definitely different.

Funny isn't it.

I don't think abuse has anything to do with it. It's just gross as hell.

I don't think "gross as hell"

but I am not thinking along abuse lines either

just wrong, somehow

I know my own father isn't a peadophile

I trust my DH's opinion that his father (or mother, come to that) isn't either

but we both agree to feeling uncomfortable with our kids sleeping with their naked gp's

I wouldn't judge someone who didn't have a problem with it, however

it's down to personal feelings, innit

all grandparents have grey pubes tis standard old pube default colour.. they also wear plaid PJs or frilly night dresses to bed ...wtf is wrong with these GPs dont they know their old wrinkly parts must be covered?

Kill Them! ...that would solve the problem

Tbh...I would not bring up this particular conversation myself...but depending how old your child is you could tell them not to climb into their grandparents bed in the morning...hows that for a non murderous solution?

It has never entered my mind to wonder what my parents or PILs wear in bed in their own homes!

OP, I would suggest either;
1)Don't let your children stay over.
2)Tell your children not to go into GPs bed. (If your child was uncomfortable though,they'd probably not be getting into bed with them anyway.)
3)Buy them some lovely PJs for christmas from DC. Make it clear DC will be desperately sad if they don't wear them, as they picked them themselves.

What you shouldn't do is tell adults who are doing you a favour how to dress, IMHO.

Nah, wouldn't bother me at all. Except that my parents are separated, so it would be very strange if it happened. But I remember being in bed with my parents and seeing them naked (and laughing at dad's dingaling willy) so it wouldn't bother me if they were in bed naked with dd as it's pretty much the same thing. Although it won't happen. And cloth is cuddlier than skin.

WOW for one of my first threads I am loving the amount of replies!!! Thanks again for all the opnions. The idea of it is not as scary as it was after hearing so many who sleep naked with kids and who wouldn't have a problem with it.

social services opinion is actually of no interest to me.

I wouldnt have a problem with it.
Truthfully before reading this thread it never even occured to me that it would be a problem. In the past ive heard DS pouncing on my sister and BIL early in the morning, I have no idea if they sleep naked or not.

Often if I go round to my parents house and my mum is in the bath I will suggest to DS that she wants company Gives me 20 minutes to put my feet up an enjoy a cup of tea! Infact I sometimes go in there myself to talk to her whilst she's soaking away!

as i work for the nhs and have to reguarly battle with work alongside social services i would not bother calling them to ask their opinion on what my children should or should not do...

i feel that as a responsible adult, i can make my own decisions about what is and is not appropriate for my children to do

i am sorry for what you have had to go through. I suspect that social services (in sweden)would laugh as over here they are more relaxed about nudity and at the end of the day it is how we as parents the children involved and the grandparents feel that is important. I however was not to sure how I felt about it initial reaction was uncomfortable.
Now I feel ok with it.

but we are not talking about any random adult, we are talking about much loved grandPARENTS..

and yes, i know there are cases where grandparents abuse children, but there are also cases where PARENTS do so..

i am confident dh is not abusing our children, and i have the same trust in my parents.. otherwise i would not let the dc within a mile of them!

KerryMumbles - ds often gets into our bed in the morning and we may or may not be naked ourselves. Should I shove him out because dh might have a morning erection? Or because he might accidently touch my breast?

I think it's a lovely thing to have the family snuggled up in bed on a Saturday morning, it's one of our traditions.

However that being said I can understand the reservations here.

Grandparents are different. They don't have the same kind of bond I suppose that a parent and child do. Whereas we can have that special closeness with our children that transcends boundaries, because we made our children, they are part of us. They are also part of their grandparents but not in the same way.

So whilst I think it's beautiful and special to sleep naked with your own children, I wouldn't like that extended to grandparents.

I remember as a child snuggling in my grandmother's bed when I stayed over. She always had her long nightie on though!

It's a difficult one because these grandparents obv sleep in the nude all the time. Would it not be disrespectful to them to ask them to cover themselves up just because your ds likes to get in bed with them in the mornings?

I suppose, as long as your ds is willingly getting into their bed, and it doesn't bother him, then you should probably just let it go. He'll get to that age soon when he will stop doing this as he becomes more self-aware anyway.

I can really understand your wariness and uncomfortableness. But I do think that if it doesn't bother your ds it shouldn't be made into a problem. Keep an eye on the situation and make it clear to your ds that he doesn't have to go into their bed in the mornings if he doesn't want to.