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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not give the child a biscuit

292 replies

Lifeinagoldfishbowl · 10/12/2009 14:07

Went to Tesco's this morning to do the grocery shop before hopping on the bus home.

Got a bit peckish so opened a new packet of chocolate bourbons and started reading my book before I noticed a 3-4 year old kicking off shouting he wanted a biscuit.

Cue the mum of said child turning to the child and saying "Would you like a biscuit?", child obviously says yes and the mum turned to me.

I carried on reading my book and the mum attracted my attention and asked for a bisucit for the still tantruming child.

I refused to give the child a biscuit - cue the child tantruming until he got off the bus 10 minutes later and lots of looks from the mum.

So should I have given the child a biscuit - I wouldn't have expected anyone to give dc (2.2) a biscuit and would have soon told him to stop tantruming and causing a nuisance on the bus.

OP posts:
itsmeolord · 10/12/2009 14:09

Very cheeky but it wouldn't have hurt you to give him a biscuit.

alicet · 10/12/2009 14:09

To be honest I would probably have felt sorry for the mum and given him a biscuit. She was cheeky to ask though and I would have done the same as you if it had been my child - told them they couldn't have a biscuit and that having a tantrum is not the way to get what they want. And clearly if she always gives her ds whatever he wants (even if it is not hers to give!!!) then no wonder he was having a strop.

YANBU though

coppertop · 10/12/2009 14:10

at the cheeky woman!

YANBU.

Morloth · 10/12/2009 14:11

Hell no. I wouldn't give my kid a biscuit if he was being a snot let alone someone else's kid.

MrsBadger · 10/12/2009 14:11

yanbu

Original poster
Lifeinagoldfishbowl · 10/12/2009 14:12

I know it wouldn't have hurt to give him a biscuit - but it was the way she offered him a biscuit before I had half a chance to think about it.

OP posts:
WeThreeNinks · 10/12/2009 14:13

YANBU, I can't believe she asked the child before even asking you.

Did you explain why not?

pagwatch · 10/12/2009 14:14

When my children tantrummed they NEVER got what they were after

[old fogey]

Funnily people used to tell me that my children never tantrumed - arn't you lucky they would say.
Noooo it is because IT NEVER WORKED !
And they are many things but they are not stupid....

[HUGE old fogey]

SCargot · 10/12/2009 14:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

waitingforbedtime · 10/12/2009 14:15

I wouldnt have had teh balls to refuse tbh but I cant believe her cheek so YANBU I think!

ChickensHaveNoTinsel · 10/12/2009 14:17

YANBU. I would probably have continued my way through the packet, making many 'mmmmm' noises.

thedollshouse · 10/12/2009 14:17

I can't believe she asked you.

I would have given him one though, she will have to suffer the consequences of giving in to tantrums not you.

SCargot · 10/12/2009 14:17

god i am always KINDLY to forrin kids when mine arent there

you were a cow
its not your battle to fight fgs

ThumbleBells · 10/12/2009 14:18

Unbelievable cheek to assume that you would just hand over a biscuit to some brat child you had never met. Appalling that she asked the child before asking you if you would mind!

YAsoNBU.

Blondeshavemorefun · 10/12/2009 14:19

cheeky cow (mum not you)

yanbu - and glad you didnt give him one - i wouldnt have either

now maybe if child was sitting nicely and a stranger asked me, i may have considered it

tantrums/stropping get nowhere

did all the other passenegers look at you in horror/admiration for not giving in?

LibrasBiscuitsOfFortune · 10/12/2009 14:20

Eating on the bus is common.

LetThereBeRock · 10/12/2009 14:20

YANBU.

Why should you give your snacks to a stranger's child?

I can't believe she had the cheek to ask.

SCargot · 10/12/2009 14:21

that oyu woudl hand over ONE MEASLY BISCUIT?

howverydarethey

pagwatch · 10/12/2009 14:22

ROFL at chicken and mmmmmnn noises

ChickensHaveNoTinsel · 10/12/2009 14:22

That they would ask, full stop. Very rude, IMO. If the child had been behaving, he/she may have been offered one.

ShellingPeas · 10/12/2009 14:22

YANBU

Woman is clearly mad - if her offspring is likely to kick off because some stranger is eating a biscuit, she should bring her own bloody biscuits with her and not except strangers to share.

You keep your biscuits to yourself.

SCargot · 10/12/2009 14:23

MAYBE

she had learning needs

arfarf
and TOP TRUMPED

ChickensHaveNoTinsel · 10/12/2009 14:24
Grin
Original poster
Lifeinagoldfishbowl · 10/12/2009 14:25

Scargot I don't think I was a cow I just ignored what was a spoilt 3-4 year old demanding a biscuit - like I wouldn't have given him a £50 note, dc's favourite toy, a lit cigarette if he had tantrummed about that.

I just carried on reading my book and ignoring the child.

However I am a meanie and dc (2.2) know's I don't give into tantrums and is often told to stop all the noise as no-one wants to listen. I would have been mortified if it had been dc doing this and I would have told him to stop misbehaving.

It might not be my battle but why should I give the child something which is mine?

OP posts:
SCargot · 10/12/2009 14:25

oh i am KIND
i give kids things and smile at them
but that is just me all around