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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

mum doesnt ever baby sit

214 replies

loujo · 08/12/2009 22:17

Hi,

Is it unreasonable for me to want to go out once in awhile ? I have a 11 month yr old baby girl , but I can never go out as my mum never offers to babysit. I dont want to go out every weekend ! Just maybe once a month to go out with my friends but I carnt as my mum wont have my baby ? She has never had her to stay the night or ever really wants to look after her, She knows how hard she is and how tierd I am ..I just need a break so bad . I dont know what to do. I feel so drained and lonely , just need time out once in awhile . But how ??? !!! Anyone think of what I can do ? x

OP posts:
LadyVolupta · 09/12/2009 00:21

awww...leave her alone...poor little thing...shes may
be hormonal

MrsMerryHenry · 09/12/2009 00:21

display - naaahh, don't worry about it. If you're happy and she's happy, that's all that counts. I'm just jealous that you have a mum . Rofl that we're probably lou mother's age! God - the thought that I could actually be the mother to an 18 yo! And - even worse - that she could turn out like loujo! (am also paranoid about the exclam marks, btw!!!!!!! - gaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!)

MrsMerryHenry · 09/12/2009 00:22

Rofl at SM's letter to self!

This has been a treat, Dandy!

Night, everyone!

BitOfFun · 09/12/2009 00:22

Are you hormonal, scottishmummy?

Aren't we all- like menopausal?

SomeGuy · 09/12/2009 00:23

Did someone mention teabagging?

displayuntiltwelfthnight · 09/12/2009 00:23

rofl
!!!!!!!!!! for good measure

yes, I was going to mention to loujo that I'm the age that she will be when her daughter is the age she is now...but thought better of it

caramelwaffle · 09/12/2009 00:24

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Look. I don't mind typing them. Send them on to me like those old fashioned chain letter thingmebubs

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ShinyAndNew · 09/12/2009 00:24

As I keep having to remind Dh when he starts with "Well can't such and such have them" as if they are doing us a disservice by refusing....You have no god given right to a babysitter.

I had dd1 young (21) and my twat of an ex never bothered with her or me.

I rarely got a night out. She had no other gp'd. My mum had offered to help too, but my dad and ill health prevented it. My sisters had dd1 when I worked, so they wouldn't have her for nights out too.

Admittedly it's hard, but motherhood is. On the brighter side, life is very different for me now, I have a DH who will stay in while I go out and a single mum friend who is gratefull for all the help she gets from us (wrt babysitting) and returns the favour.

Life will get easier. It is not always this hard. It might seem like it now, but it's not.

And lucky you having the net. When I was a single mum I had my phone and terrestrial tv to keep company of a night.

ChazsBarmyArmy · 09/12/2009 00:25

SM you're missing the point - you were writing about yourself

Milk - motherly desire to nurture
Baguette - desire to experience new and foreign things.
Cheese - if you were thinking mild cheddar then subconsciously you knew your life was a bit bland whereas if it was stilton then perhaps you have a rich and mature view of life (for brie see baguette)
Teabag - an urge to diffuse the world with warmth and flavour.

Its so revealing! (or should that be !!!!!!!)

FrankCross · 09/12/2009 00:26

SomeGuy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!

DandyLioness · 09/12/2009 00:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

SomeGuy · 09/12/2009 00:27

I learned a new word.

Irrumatio.

Sesame Street was brough to you by the letters F and O, and the number 69.

FrankCross · 09/12/2009 00:27
SomeGuy · 09/12/2009 00:29

Wikipedia truly is the font of all knowledge.

The sidebar for 'irrumatio' has:

"Look up skull fucking, face fucking, or throat fucking in Wiktionary, the free dictionary."

Britannica eat your heart pussy out.

scottishmummy · 09/12/2009 00:29

Chazs aye you have revealed my inner phantasy just concealed behind groceries. baguette as phallic as it comes.oh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i said comes

BitOfFun · 09/12/2009 00:31

This has taken a very surreal turn...

lowrib · 09/12/2009 00:35

loujo FWIW I don't think you're being unreasonable to be upset that your mum doesn't want to be more involved in your child's life.

Most times when I ask my mum to have my DS (even if only for 15 minutes) she acts as if it's a real impositon. I wish she wanted to help me in that way, it does hurt that she doesn't.

To the rest of you, I'm actually quite shocked, and ashamed to be associated with you tonight, you really do come across as a bitter clique / a bitchy bunch of playground bullies sometimes.

Perhaps loujo is a troll, but perhaps she's a real person. I see no reason to believe she's not actually an 18 year old who's finding it tough and could do with some support. I thought that's what mumsnet was about? Or does speaking in text (i.e. probably young) disqualify a person from receiving any support?

Some of her later posts are pretty offensive, but do you know what, I don't blame her for getting defensive with you lot rounding on her.

Shame on you.

displayuntiltwelfthnight · 09/12/2009 00:36

you are joking lowrib?

lowrib · 09/12/2009 00:37

Why do you think I'm joking?

BitOfFun · 09/12/2009 00:37

I think you are getting the chicken and egg mixed up, lowrib.

scottishmummy · 09/12/2009 00:38

yes shame on all us grans bullying croydon facelift lou

we should stick to teena pads
and bingo
like the ole ginmmers we are

lockets · 09/12/2009 00:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

BitOfFun · 09/12/2009 00:40

Nobody, for example, has used a derogatory word about the OP. I was quite offended by the word she used, as a parent of a child with LD. I didn't insult her back though.

SomeGuy · 09/12/2009 00:40

actually the reason I got pissed was because the programme about dementia care homes was a bit depressing. Alcohol seemed like a good response.

In £39k/year home one they played bingo and such like, but in the cheaper ones they just sat there throwing shoes at each other.

Kaloki · 09/12/2009 00:40

Lowrib > If she'd actually been friendly to those that offered her advice/support then I'd agree with you, but she was rude to everyone regardless. Which suggests to me she is only here for a fight, which usually equates to troll.