Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Original poster

To Wonder what this woman is thinking??

225 replies

TheLadyEvenstar · 22/07/2009 08:32

right before i go any further please read this bit first.
I do NOT have a problem with mix race relationships but i do think this WOMAN takes it to the limit.

she has

dd1 white english
ds1 white irish
dd2 white irish
dd3 white irish
dd4 half turkish
dd5 half indian
ds2 half indian
dd6 white english
ds3 half somalian

is now pg again has 5 grand children all of which are living in her home. she has never worked and always seems to find non working husbands/partners. They have 2 houses knocked into one, and its all paid for by council!

sorry just having a moan

OP posts:

imaynotbeperfectbutimokmummy · 23/07/2009 00:01

Actually, i would have thought it was shit to come on here and talk about your "friend" having different fathers for her children. With friends like you.............

at the comment re your other friend putting one of her children in the sun so he looks the same colouring as his sister.

I actually knew twins who were two different colours, the lad was blonde and just looked a bit tanned, his sister was black. The unusual thing was their mum was white and their dad was indian.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:04

Imay, she was not a friend, although she is now, she was an adult whilst i was still a child. But it is her favourite tale of what she did with her 2 sons. it makes her giggle because she says she cannot believe she was so stupid when she was young.

OP posts:

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:04

and the fact that one of the childrens' fathers tried to take her to his home country has nothing to do with his race. he could have done that whether he was indian, russian, british, american or any other nationality.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:07

and where did i mention his race???? i said one of the fathers i never mentioned which one now did i?

OP posts:

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:10

do i have to quote you again?

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:11

"and yes the race of the father who was trying to snatch his dd was the reason he was taking her to his home country"

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:16

have gone through all the messages and the only thing i can find is this.......

By TheLadyEvenstar on Wed 22-Jul-09 23:40:53
I have been witness to one of the fathers trying to snatch one of the dd;s to return to their home country with her

still can't see where i mentioned his race or which father it was so please enlighten me?

OP posts:

NotPlayingAnyMore · 23/07/2009 00:16

"I do feel very sorry for the children involved there are 5 different cultures in one household," - 5 different cultures in one household is not a reason for pity.

"She cannot teach each child about their culture it is impossible, she was not in the relationships long enough to learn enough." - it's not "impossible" for anyone other than their father to teach them about their cultures, but - for all you know - they may wish to consider themselves as British as the next person.

"It makes no odds what I say i have been branded as racist because I voiced my opnion." - no, you are being branded a racist because you are one.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:17

ahhh i mentioned the word race i never mention HIS race, i never said where he was from did i???

OP posts:

NotPlayingAnyMore · 23/07/2009 00:18

If they were being taught about their own cultures, I'd bet my ass you'd be banging on about them not adopting the "British way of life" (whatever that is).

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:20

Notplaying, I am far from racist not the way i was brought up. We are all entitled to our opinions and I personally think she is opening her children to racism, we live in a real world and sadly people are still small minded and racist. I am not one of these thankfully. But i am entitled to my opinion, and yes she is aware of it.

I would agree with your opinion of the children considering themselves as british as the next person if 2 of them were not in muslim headscarves and had been since they turned 10.

As for teaching them herself she has stated in the past she found it difficult.

OP posts:

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:22

you said his race was the reason he tried to snatch his dd.

how the hell can his race be the reason he tried to snatch her?

his personality, yes
his race, no.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:23

Notplaying, no i wouldn't actually but maybe you know me better than i know myself. So please bet your ass as much as you like if it makes you happy. I have stated many times I am not what is classed as "fully british" and am proud of my heritage, although my Polish Grandad refused to teach us polish as we were born here.....but then he was stubborn.

OP posts:

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:23

you can be british and a muslim you know!!

oh you really are making it worse every time you respond.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:24

Booyhoo he was taking her back to his home country for his mother to raise, that was his plan, he said it was tradition for the mother to raise the first born daughter so yes looking at it that way it was due to his race.

OP posts:

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:25

Booyhoo yes I know that I was married to a muslim thanks, but i never converted and he was not british.

OP posts:

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:30

no it was due to his upbringing not his race.

but these children are british and muslim.

being muslim does not disqualify them from also being british.

you said you would agree with the children considering themselves british IF two of them were not in muslim headscarves.

implying that they arent british because they wear muslim headscarves.

you are ignorant and you are racist.
you are ignorant to the extent that you dont know you are racist.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:33

Booyhoo and you are on a high horse, I am not racist....i have no room to be. But please if it keeps you happy to accuse me of being go ahead and do so. SIlly insults on here kinda go in one ear and out the other. On the other hand people who can see both sides of it are actually worthy of listening/reading.

I am aware that you can be british and muslim. these girls do not see themselves as british...so I am told. But hey you may know more about them than I do.

Oh and you will also notice, that I have not insulted anybody yet have sat here being insulted etc and not risen to it.....personally i think that speaks volumes about who is ignorant and who is not.

OP posts:

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:37

well if race truly is of no consequence to you then it never would have entered your head to mention it.

and you keep adding in bits of information that wasnt given at the start which makes me doubt the truthfulness of it.

booyhoo · 23/07/2009 00:39

and now im going.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 00:40

Booyhoo, if thats what keeps you happy insulting and doubting then please carry on. If i had tried to get it all into the OP than I probably would still be typing what with having 2 dc to look after, packing to do for the move, and various other things to do.

Unfortunatly i stop typing to deal with dc then come back to carry on and the thread has moved on so i have to add the extra details then. oh if only i had time to do it all in one go.....my life would be much easier!

OP posts:

NotQuiteNorbert · 23/07/2009 01:04

I've only read the original post and a couple others after that, but I really don't believe the lady actually intended to be racist. However, that is how her OP has come across, due to her listing of the childrens' ethnicities. If on the other hand she had said "This woman has 9 children by X number of fathers... etc" it would have come across much better and avoided much of the argument on this thread.

Ok, I'm going back to the corner to hide now.

NotPlayingAnyMore · 23/07/2009 01:09

"I personally think she is opening her children to racism, we live in a real world and sadly people are still small minded and racist. I am not one of these thankfully." - as you still can't seem to fathom why the blame lays on the racists rather than the mother, you are one of those small minded people.

...on top of being a racist yourself, of course.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 23/07/2009 01:14

oh fgs i am not racist......i have not said the blame does not lie with the racists.

Look it is no different to opening your child to a road accident if you let them play near the road, or an ice skating accident if they are ice skating.....sadly these things happen. But we do our best as parents to avoid them.

OP posts:

NotPlayingAnyMore · 23/07/2009 01:27

By being careful not to have too many children of the mixed races you 'do NOT have a problem with", yeah?

"oh fgs i am not racist......" - you fail to convince me that you know the meaning of the word.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9