Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To Wonder what this woman is thinking??

225 replies

TheLadyEvenstar · 22/07/2009 08:32

right before i go any further please read this bit first.
I do NOT have a problem with mix race relationships but i do think this WOMAN takes it to the limit.

she has

dd1 white english
ds1 white irish
dd2 white irish
dd3 white irish
dd4 half turkish
dd5 half indian
ds2 half indian
dd6 white english
ds3 half somalian

is now pg again has 5 grand children all of which are living in her home. she has never worked and always seems to find non working husbands/partners. They have 2 houses knocked into one, and its all paid for by council!

sorry just having a moan

OP posts:
junglist1 · 22/07/2009 09:12

How does she cope????????????? My mate has children Irish English Jamiacan and Moroccan mixed (she's Greek) and people look, but all it was is that in each new relationship she had that hope that this was her Knight. They were all twats in the end though.

ChopsTheDuck · 22/07/2009 09:17

The only thing I would wonder with so many racial backgrounds is how on earth she does teach them all about their cultural heritage!
I have two children that are mixed race and I put a lot of effort into making sure they are aware of where they come from on both sides.

Other than that, she sounds like she has had a lot of bad luck in choosing men and is to be sympathised with really, especially if she is copign adequately with 10 kids and still being stigmatised by the neighbours. I wouldn't eb very hands on if I had ten neither!

junglist1 · 22/07/2009 09:24

I agree they need to be taught about their heritage. Hopefully they'd still be in contact with family members or have friends who can take care of that

ReneRusso · 22/07/2009 09:26

I don't agree with willingly churning out kids when you can't financially support them, but that is inevitable in a society which offers this option. However I'm afraid you blew it with the mixed race info which is not relevant, unless you are racist. YABU.

SlartyBartFast · 22/07/2009 09:30

well i think it is pretty shocking.
she has had by my estimation 6 different partners and had children with all of them,

or it could be more partners.

who wouldnt judge?

Sheenamac1970 · 22/07/2009 09:34

Eh, two generations back it was very normal indeed for women to have 10+ children - all my grandparents came from massive families. Thank goodness the state has helped her out and she doesn't have to live in a small place where the kids all sleep in the one room. Honestly.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 22/07/2009 09:39

YABreally fuckingU to make your OP about the ethnicities of the fathers. Are you pissed off about her having lots of babies? None of your business. Are you pissed off about them having different fathers? Also none of your business. Are you pissed off about the fathers having different ethnicities? Racist, unpleasant and still none of your business.

SlartyBartFast · 22/07/2009 09:49

i think even before we knew what actually happened with shannon matthews, her mother was pretty well judged on here for having children with so many different fathers.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 22/07/2009 09:52

Kat, if you read all my postings on this thread you will see my concerns.

Slarty there are 6 different fathers but there have been many other men

OP posts:
MadameCastafiore · 22/07/2009 09:55

Poor woman has names shouted at her in the street and spray painted outside her house and someone who is supposed to be her friends posting racist threads on the tinternet about her!

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 22/07/2009 09:59

Madame, i fail to see where I have been racist? they are the races of her children and yes it is relevant to the names she has shouted at her and the things sprayed. i stated facts, i did not slag her off and I have also said I am concerned for her and her children.

OP posts:
ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 22/07/2009 10:08

you said she was 'taking it too far' by having so many different ethnicities in her children, not because of the number of dads. You are slipping in the concerns about how she has been treated to justify your, basically, racist judgement about how many different races her kids' dads have.

You are implying that women shouldn't have kids of different races to them in case they get racially abused. Pathetic.

MadameCastafiore · 22/07/2009 10:13

YOU ARE BEING RACIST - you are making judgements based on the fact that her children have fathers of different ethnicities - YOU ARE BEING RACIST.

Now apologise, say you have learnt from what others have posted and get on with your life, supporting your so called friend.

Big mistake posting this - BOW OUT GRACIOUSLY.

Nancy66 · 22/07/2009 10:14

I don't think the race of the children or the men she shags is relevant.

but it's awful that she keeps spewing out kids that she has no means or desire to support. Why doesn't she just get sertilised?

Now she's a grandmother. What's the betting her kids will all copy her pattern - multiple children by multiple partners?

We SHOULD be judging people like this - can you imagine how much they are going to cost the tax payer in their life time and it's likely that not one of them will make a single contribution.

People like her are the reason that the under 40s will probably not have a guranteed state old age pension.

ChopsTheDuck · 22/07/2009 10:21

the op is not being bloody racist. I am in a mixed race relationship and I don't find anythign racially offensive in what she is saying.

I think race IS relevant in the situation when you consider the issue of 5 different cultural backgrounds to consider

Morloth · 22/07/2009 10:22

I wonder if anyone shouts "League of all Nations" at Angelina Jolie?

Having kids when you can't afford them is a bit dim, entering into the same sorts of crappy relationships over and over is a bit dim.

Having children of different races is not.

CaresMildly · 22/07/2009 10:37

I'm quite impressed at the local kids shouting "League of Nations" at her. What very well read young people they must be. Last time I spoke to my teenage niece she claimed to know nothing about the Cold War so this is a good sign of improving educational standards.

Would you share what the graffiti is? Interesting comments about Prussia and the annexing of Austria?

BonsoirAnna · 22/07/2009 10:47

I don't think that the ethnicity of the children is of any consequence at all.

What is an issue is having many children that she and her partners are not able, and will never be able (and have no intention of trying) to support without the help of the state.

imaynotbeperfectbutimokmummy · 22/07/2009 10:48

my only is OMFG 10 children - she must be mad!!

That was my first thought - my second thought, is that you are being very unreasonable and you only posted to antagonise and incite a racist discussion. Its not a nice image i have to say - wind your neck in and stop being a curtain twitcher.

BonsoirAnna · 22/07/2009 10:49

FWIW, I know several large blended families where the children are not all the same culture/nationality combination, and it doesn't matter one little bit. And their parents are able to support them very well indeed, so it really is of no-one's business at all.

imaynotbeperfectbutimokmummy · 22/07/2009 10:54

Chopstheduck, i think its fantastic that your children are lucky enough to have a mum and dad who are keen for them to learn about their heritage (is that the right word). But how important is it to everyone? Genuine question - i do get confused about it honestly i do. Surely its just a case of wanting to know about your family, whatever nationality or roots - my mum is half spanish and yes, i think there was definately a sense of pride in this within our family. My cousins more so, athough it didnt seem too much of a big deal to my mum. So saying that, surely its a case of wanting to know about family background and if nationality is a big deal to that particular family then its brilliant, if not, well its OK too. Not sure im being very clear.

I guess the issue with these children is not having their natural fathers around, regardless of race or nationality. But my DD never knew her biological father, but she has never suffered because of it.

imaynotbeperfectbutimokmummy · 22/07/2009 10:59

LAdyevenstar, i suggest you give up reading the daily mail and try and be a REAL friend to this woman. I am heartily sick of everything that is wrong with this country being blamed on immigrants coming over here and taking all the jobs/housing/women - i hear it all the fecking time. I heard some stupid bitch the other day saying that english is going to be a second language in this country soon - i just walked off suppressing laughter at the ignorant bitch. I know you didnt do this exactly, but its much the same isn;t it - oh, shes got a massive house provided by the council etc etc. SO WHAT!!! Smacks of jealousy to me.

ReneRusso · 22/07/2009 11:24

pmsl @ CaresMildly

saintmaybe · 22/07/2009 11:27

It's a bit disingenuous to say 'It's not racist to object to her having kids with dads of diff ethnicities, because the reason I object is because racists will object and, er, be racist to her family'

And btw, I didn't 'spew out' my children, nancy, did you? And the reasons that there are unlikely to be decent pensions for most of us has far more to do with the greed of the bankers, financiers and people running pension plans over the last 30 years than someone with a lot of children and no job.

SouthMum · 22/07/2009 11:27

I'll stick up for TLES a bit here - if I saw someone with such a diverse litter of children I think I'd raise my eyebrows in a "blimey does she enjoy different cultures or what!" way. The same way I'd probably react if I saw a bunch of kids to one women with ginger, blonde, black or brown hair (not on the same head obviously)

Not related either but in repsonse to Imaynotbeperfect - I have had experience of the council housing giving preference to an immigrant family over a member of my family who had to live in a damp flat that caused health problems to his and his partners baby (which she still has). I watched as the council rocked up and renovated the house for them while my relation is still waiting for theirs to be sorted out. It is easy to see sometimes why people get frustrated with the current state of affairs and come out with claptrap but that doesn't make them racist.

Swipe left for the next trending thread