i cannot fucking cope

[justcannotcope]

my toddler ds is constantly whining, not crying, kind of 'het het het' noise. It is driving me mad. I just cannot cope with him today. I am ashamed to say I scream at him to shut up sometimes.
I hate my life, sometimes I hate him, but I know I really love him if that makes sense. In my more rational moments I worry about how the shouting is affecting him.

I feel so fed up, all I seem do is stay at home in my tatty dressing gown and try to block out the noise. I cry, I shout, I eat too much.

I can't face toddler group, have not been this year. I have no decent clothes and I feel fat and totally gross. I have suffered from depression but thought I was better. Some days I feel ok but today is shit.

This is not a troll. I am just ashamed and need to let it all out. I don't know what to do to pick myself up.

You might find that one of your local churches has a coffee shop - I used to frequent one that charged 50p for a coffee and had toys out. Even better was that there was always someone to chat to (and it wasn't in an evangelical way, just that they were that sort of ladies) and it made a damp nasty day a lot better.

How about not doing a big shop every week and planning on going out every day to buy veggies etc ? That way you have a reason to go out every day too

That's great news. Let us know if you need any more virtual support. And when you feel ready, do try to talk to your GP or other professional who might be able to help in the real world - I know they can be truly appalling, and it's always when you need help the most that you're least able to deal with it. But nobody should be going through what you are by themselves.

Skinny hot chocolate is such a good choice - I love it too. It also tastes good out of a flask if you make it at home and take it with you, like one of the others suggested.

Take care, Hx

Oh JCC, glad you had a nice time.
Hope you have a lovely weekend

Hi JCC so glad you had a good time

here are some other £10 suggestions:

museum & cafe

cinema (our local one does a 'baby' cinema in which toddlers can go to and run around)

Aromatherapy burner (lavender and oil) to have burning whilst you have a bath (DS either alseep or looked after by DH)

Park with picnic (buy yourself some really nice food )

Go round the charity shops - get a couple of nice things for a tenner.

may cost more but maybe for birthday get massage/reflexology.

go to the gym - for a tenner a week you could join a pretty plush gym possible with a creche.

round our way £15 is a half day childminder rate - give yourself half a day a week off - heaven and in that time NO housework/shopping; either long bath/gym/cinema/hairdresser...or a bit of all of them!

Or if you have a friend with a kid maybe arrange a half day weekly swap (kids happier, you half day on your own) - I do it with a friend and it works brilliantly.

keep on going x

Pleased to hear you got out and enjoyed it? Did it help ds too? Hope you have a good weekend - let us know how you are.

Hi JCC - so pleased to read your posts and know you are feeling better.

Is the baby still making that noise which you found so annoying? Or was it just that you were feeling low so it bugged you more than usual?

Enjoy your weekend. Take care.

Glad you're feeling better JCC!

Hi, have been lurking on this thread since yesterday, and just want to agree with everyone who said getting out of the house is essential for your sanity when you've a toddler.

I wanted to suggest the local library too. Our's has toys as well as books for young children, and I used spend an hour there just sitting flicking through a newspaper whilst the dc pottered around. Free too!
It was just handy to have somewhere to aim for when we went for a walk, and useful for days when it was too wet for the park.

I hope you are feeling ok. I have felt like you too. Exactly the same, even the fat feeling, dirty clothes etc., But like everyone else has said, you do need to get out, even in dirty clothes, i just used to throw a coat over at one stage, no one ever knew!! The light and fresh air does make you feel better. I

Haven't read whole thread...

Everyone has had bad times...

BUT there are choices.
A trick I do when I am feeling impatient/like an evil mum, I imagine what I behave like when I am feeling calm/chilled out/whatever.
Then I just pretend that I am feeling that way, and act that way. Soon you start feeling that way.
Then I put up a bubble to stop all the annoying bahaviour from getting to me. Imagine it all bouncing off.

Does that make sense?
Everyone has crap times- everyone.
Take Care

Like a few others have also said, I too have felt like this quite a few times, and it's just frustrating because you know it's wrong and you know you should pull yourself out of it, but some days (or alot) you don't.

But the best thing you can do (even if you do look like total shit, god haven't we all!) just get washed, scrape your hair back chuck your child in a buggy and go for a nice long walk. Doesn't have to be anywhere inparticular, just do it. It stops the little one whinging for a bit and gets you the fresh air and a little time to gather your thoughts back.

I know you don't feel like it, but honestly once you got out it does help you feel better. Plus exercise is very good for depression. It helps boost your bodies energy levels back up.

Hope it helps. xx