AIBU to think DS and SIL shouldn’t be commenting on DS’s bottle?

[AmpleFish]

title should say DB rather than DS!

DS (just turned 4) has always taken a bottle of milk to bed and had one in the morning when he wakes. We brush his teeth afterwards and his dentist hasn’t mentioned it so assuming all is fine.
This weekend my brother came down to visit from Scotland. He and SIL made repeated comments to me and DH about how DS was too old to be having a bottle.
AIBU to think he should stay in his lane? Particularly when he and SIL have a 2.5 and 3.5 year old and neither are potty trained! I think they need to take some of their own medicine before commenting on others!

A 4yr old should be in preschool/nursery, most kids start kindergarten knowing the alphabet, how to write their name, and sight words. And should 100% not be having bottles anymore.

The big difference between your parenting 'fail' and theirs is that taking a bottle away is entirely within a parent's gift, potty training relies on factors which are not so much within their control.

Come on OP, you really need to switch the bottle to a cup. You are doing your child no favours, completely unnecessary and actually damaging.

Four year olds don’t need bottles. Prolonged usage of a bottle can, and very often, does affect jaw development and can cause bottle caries. It needs to go @AmpleFish

to protect children

I think everyone should just shut up about other people's parenting unless they are asked for their opinion.

No one wants to be criticised or judged . And what is the gain except to hurt people's feelings .

So people should just do what they want with their children, whether it's through lack of knowledge or deliberately harming them then?

Really, your son needs to be weaned off of a bottle now. Equally, your brother’s child should be potty trained by now. 🤷‍♀️

Notice how all the people being pro-baby bottles for school aged children think it's fine because who cares/my cousin did it and is fine.
The people who know why it's very bad post facts and links to the science behind how it impacts development.

Wow! I remember my just turned 2 year old was too old and feeling guilty about the bottle! We got her off very soon after… and a family member even commented then.

eta, she’s 4 now and the idea that she’d go to bed with a bottle is laughable.

It’s just screaming lazy parenting vs lazy parenting tbh

@Mulledjuice Protect children from milk bottles ? And potty training ? Nope .
Real issues are not different parenting it's deliberate abuse .

Why is your 4 year old son still drinking from a bottle?

I woudl argue that potty training can absolutely be controlled - kids need encouragement to recognise the signs and make attempts to go use the potty otherwise they’ll just carry on going in their nappies like they always have

He’s an only child

No attempts with either kid I don’t think

No they haven’t bothered at all, they just let her keep wearing nappies

You should have said he was still having night time breastfeeds for comfort op 😬

Have you tried to wean off the bottle?

Breastfeeding is different and is natural all the way up until about 7 in some parts of the world

Huh??

I think a lack of potty training affects their child’s daily life a lot more than mine’s for 10 mins morning and evening

I am finding it hilarious that the OP is just replying to comments to attack that her niece and nephew aren’t potty trained even more. Came on to moan about her brother commenting on her son’s bottle and continuous to be vicious and vile. Proper pot calling the kettle 🙄

Did a couple of quick googles for some info to make sure I had updated figures

The average potty training age varies widely around the world, ranging from 6 to 18 months in parts of Asia, Africa, and rural communities, to 2.5 to 4 years in Western nations like the United States, United Kingdom, and Sweden

The average age for potty training in the UK is around 2.5 to 3.5 years old

So the 3.5 year old is getting towards the top end but not unheard of.

Children should start weaning off milk bottles around 12 months of age and be completely off them by 18 months , according to health guidelines from the NHS and pediatric specialists

Looking at average age for the UK it said
Many toddlers continue using a bottle for comfort—particularly at bedtime—well into 15 to 18 months, and sometimes up to 2 years.

This means your 4 year old is very past when the recommendation are and the average.

However whether either of you should comment on the others way of parenting is a completely different question and one IMO where you both should stop (though I acknowledge you didn't comment you had mentioned the potty training)

other people should mind their business when it comes to peoples parenting unless the child is in danger, or the parent asks for advice.

If you were extended breastfeeding him at night you'd have likely had more posts saying they need to butt out.