To expect a 50 yr old man to be able to change a duvet cover.

[DaisyDukes2]

As it says on the time really. Any time he changes it (always prompted by me) he manages to put it in the wrong way (super king size duvet so wider than long). He did it again yesterday only this time the duvet cover was inside out too. Asked him to fix it and he faffed around with it but made it worse. I refused to fix it or sleep under it so grabbed a spare duvet and used that myself last night. Today he asked me to fix it because he just can't do it. Too small a hill to die on???

of course, equally pathetic but on this thread, it's the 50yo husband who is being an idiot 😂

And it's generally more often the husbands who complain about lack of sex, slightly less often the wives. Being pathetic is such a turn off for most people!

Gosh, what a bitter assumption to make.
Why would I list all the amazing things about him which are completely irrelevant to the question asked by the OP?!

@dontforgetofeedthecat “Being pathetic is such a turn off for most people!”

I totally agree!

5ft 6 is tallish for a woman. In any case, if you're 5ft 2 or under certain tasks are made more difficult because of lack of height.
I cannot reach the top shelf in the supermarket if things are towards the back of it.

I find changing the duvet cover a real chore and I don't mind housework. 'Like' would be going too far.

I do hate doing mine tbh but I do it by myself! I refuse to ask the teens to help me as it feels so pathetic!

Why? I grew up before duvets were common, DM would always get one of us ( from well before teenage) to help fold the sheets and make the beds. They’re tasks which are simply much easier with one person each side, assuming the bed isn’t against a wall.

He just doesn’t want to do it. Simply.

Not when you live alone its not!

YANBU
DW always gets me to do ours. She’s shorter than me and not unreasonably notes that it is easier for me to shake the duvet down in the cover.
Always use the duvet cover starting inside out technique and grab the top corners / shake.
We did once have a cleaner who managed to put the clean duvet cover on over the top of the dirty one - that was particularly clever.

Give him a lesson.

To be fair, I'm almost 60 and am still crap at getting a king-size duvet cover on a duvet. DH is much taller than me, with long arms, and just has the knack.

If anything ever happens to him I might just use a single duvet for the rest of my life!

Yes I'm deffo incompetent (weaponised) when it comes to car maintenance.....so I don't mind doing more traditional female tasks while he does stuff I don't want to ("male" tasks)....it's whatever works for you as a couple....as long as you're both happy and not feeling unsupported or aggrieved

I remember when they had it on the Generation Game! The women did it easily! Was probably a double, back then.

If you are lucky enough to have two floors in your house then do the inside out thing and shake it out over your banister. It works a treat.

True. This made me laugh because when I wrote my original comment about me not being hugely tall at 5ft 6 I think I was comparing myself to my own family - Ds aged 14 is 6ft 3 and dd aged 23 is 6ft 1. So I am very much the shortest… and still do the beds. 😳😂

Plenty of women seem to use “weaponised incompetence” as well by pretending they are unable to handle car maintenance,

Car maintenance nowadays requires specialty tools, equipment, and training. Very basic things like adding oil or wiper fluid and changing the filter aren't but those are getting fewer and fewer.

this definitely and these days getting stuff wrong can be expensive! I don't think many men (if any) do their own car maintenance beyond the basics in the same way that my Dad did (I am in my 70's)

We change the duvet together, practice makes perfect, easier to handle and quicker. We have preferred jobs, but I come from a household where we all knew what to do, even if not great at it, so I made sure DH was up to spec in household activities, as there are times we all need to get on and do in the absence of others. Incompetence is simply unwillingness to learn imo, especially where bedding is concerned. Same goes for children, get them involved and undertaking tasks ASAP.

We do ours together as it needs 2 to lift the heavy mattress when changing the sheet.

I guess it would never be fixed then because either he learned or he would sleep that way

I think l am pretty competent at most things but l bloody hate putting on duvet covers. Always call dh to help. Especially if all our adult kids have been home and there is lots to do. We just do it together. I also call him if l get a puncture and he comes running. It doesn't always have to be a big deal.

Im female and have always struggled with putting duvet covers on and ask for help. I also struggle with left and right and other tasks that require hand/eye coordination. Not so much that theyd meet any sort of diagnostic threshold for dyspraxia, but enough that simple things other people find easy are harder for me! My exH (and my mother come to think of it), used to huff at me all the time for being "cack handed" and ridicule me for it, and scold me for making a "pig's ear of things", when I really was trying my best!

I dont think its fair to assume he's doing it badly on purpose, unless this is the first time he's ever struggled to do it and hes being a dick all of a sudden.

Given that he's had a go, got it wrong, and asked for help... I'd help! Flouncing off annoyed seems unnecessary and unkind.

Also, super king duvets are a massive PITA, it's always easier having a second person I find!

I struggle with the damn things, especially king-size ones. It's my least favourite chore. I still do it. But it might not be as simple as weaponised incompetence.

Super king here, we do it together, as we both dislike it. I hate washing up, so DH does it, I clean bathrooms instead, because I like it, and him not so much.

Yeah, I’m a corner grabber and shaker too. So easy.