AIBU to feel upset my parents are selling their holiday home?

[DeeDeeDodo]

So I do know I am being unreasonable... but my parents own a holiday home abroad, which we go to with our kids 3-4 times a year as we absolutely love it and it is a cost effective way to have a holiday as we only pay for the flights and cleaner. I've been going for 30 years so feels like a home from home.

My parents are finding it too much to manage and get there so were going to let me and my brother take over management. However, they have now changed their minds and are going to sell it. They openly say they don't need the money, but they want to dispose of it as they're not using it. It is worth a fair amount (more than my house) and the money is just going to sit in a bank account not doing anything for anybody - my parents won't require it for care even if that time comes as they have other means.

I realise this is completely their choice, but I am crushed. I have so many of my happiest memories there, espeically of my children. It enables so much quality family time for us, which as the children get older I know will become more challenging to get at home.

We also won't really be able to afford holidays now. We both work full time in demanding jobs with long hours and have always had the next trip there booked so always had that to look forward to.

Not really sure what I am saying, but I find it upsetting that something so important to me, my husband and kids will be gone for no benefit to anybody.

69% think you bring upset is not reasonable? I would be very upset, clearly there are a lot of hard nosed robots on here.

The CGT equivalent in foreign countries will have different rules, and there could well be an additional liability in UK.

Not of it's then cut off! My parents would never have dreamed of not sharing their wealth with me, what an idea. You can't take it with you!

They have shared the holiday home with their children for 30 years. OP has been taking her family 3-4 times a year. Why should her parents carry on owning a house if it’s getting stressful for them? Just so Op can have a cheap holiday. OP needs to stop being selfish and think about her parents needs and wants.

£15k accommodation for 2 weeks?!!
Youre having a laugh. Maybe time to choose a different destination.

Sure, so the parents should think about gifting OP and her brother the house.@

This. Take the worry away from them, and continue to enjoy holidays there.

Could you do a business plan of how much it could make as an air b&b and offer to manage it? Just tell them it would make no difference to them, except it would still be available to use for the family and produce a passive income. I know you discussed that before but maybe try again if it means a lot to you.

Her parents have shared it with the family for the last 30 year. Whose to say that they won't give her and her brother a share of the money from the house sale? We had a property in France that we sold a few years ago as the expense of the upkeep and the annual French equivalents of council tax were becoming too much for us as we were reaching retirement on modest pensions. We have given our adult children most of the money from it's sale. They have used this to buy their own properties here. A much better use of the money than a property abroad which stood empty half of the year.

It’s natural you will feel sad but at the end of the day it’s their house to do what they like with. Could you buy it off them or buy jointly with your brother? If not there’s not really much you can do.

Where on earth is it for those prices?! I can’t fathom anywhere in Europe being that much, maybe the south of France?!

Why? It’s their house! OP will probably benefit from the sale once both parents are gone.

That’s just greedy! We also have no idea what the rest of their relationship looks like.

ultimately OP will get a very nice inheritance but I can see why her parents are keen to simplify their holdings as they get older. Gifting it isn’t straight forward as they would need to find the cash for the taxes.

Absolutely but I think once you’ve held a property in Italy for as long as OP’s parents, the local CGT is £nil? I’m definitely not an Italian tax adviser though!

There should be a Double Taxation Agreement between UK and Italy that ensures the same gain doesn’t get taxed twice.

OP there are a number of jealous people on this thread, you would be minded to ignore.

I would be heart broken if our family holiday home was sold without all the options having been explored. Have your parents explored all the options. If they gift it to you and your brother there may be tax on the gift depending on the country and you have to be scrupulous about taking over the running costs and having a clear paperwork trail. However CGT becomes due on disposal and if you intended to keep it in perpetuity that is a moot point.

Your parents wouldn’t be able to holiday there in the same manner as when they owned it once the gift is made but an occasional trip would be reasonable.

I would seek advice from an in country lawyer and accountant to establish the legal and financial position.

can you and your brother cover the capital gains tax?

You should be grateful you had use of it until now. You can get a nice family holiday for much less than £15k. You do not need to go the to same luxury location. And yes it is a luxury location if accommodation is £15k.

That’s a good point on property taxes and other costs - particularly as a non resident owner. It doesn’t sound like OP is truly aware of the costs involved and has been happily having her free holidays without another thought

the reluctance to, indicates what the relationship is like

This price is really hard to believe honestly. Unless she’s only looking at 5* hotels and then it’s easier to fathom.

15K for a holiday 😳

I’m not sure this post is real but if you post your requirements I’m sure someone would be able to find something more in budget.

Are you saying you can’t afford any type of holiday @DeeDeeDodo ?

Yes, you're right. They haven't done anything, have they? Only raised, clothed and provided for them, then made sure they got free holidays for decades. Rotten parents.

Yeah I’d hate to have parents like that 🙄

A friend of mine has recently sold their long term holiday home in France, but that was because none of their adult DCs wanted to take it on.

If I were OP's parents I would be looking at the tax situation to see if it may be more efficient to transfer ownership to OP and her brother, rather than sell it. However, Op and DB should be aware of what running costs they will need to cover in future, plus the responsibility of owning a property abroad, these costs can be considerable and may not be manageable but OP might feel happier if this option was at least explored.