To think a man with five kids he barely sees won’t be considered a catch on the dating scene?

[Bezerk]

It’s my ex. I am feeling quite bitter tonight and could do with some reassurance that he won’t continue getting everything he wants…

I wouldn't give this man any head space, why are you asking if someone will get with him just because he has 5 kids, yes someone will likely get with him, no differently than in the future you might meet someone willing to get with you and your two kids.
You need to forget he exists and moved on with your life, maybe some counselling will help

Edit: think I misread that compeltely.

So you went into a relationship with him knowing he already had 3 children. Not really any worse than the 5 is it?

Well you dated a man with 3 kids he barely sees so you're better placed to answer than we are.

A couple of posts in and we have the winner.

Yes to a lot of women this will be the only consideration.

Not always true, I don’t think. My dd, who is 17 has a deadbeat dad who has never so much as asked after her. As a result, he’s the only one in his family not to be married, now. Everyone knows he has a child he ignores and women gave him a wide berth. Different culture to ours though.

No sensible woman would take on a package deal like that unless the splits and child arrangements are fully amicable and he pulls his own weight with the child care.. Or maybe if he is really wealthy and can afford to support every dependent sufficiently without impacting on a new partner.

However even if he isn't, there are some women out there who are gullible enough to believe his version of the break up tales, and even feel sorry for him .

Sadly some guys are like this, my friends DD dated someone who had 5 kids with 5 different women, within less than a year she was pregnant … no idea how many kids he has now but he pays sod all fir child 6

You'd think that given how awful he is @Bezerk would be glad to be shot of him.

I never get these posts where it is stated that the ex is a complete bastard.
Which he appears to be here.

Not just unpleasant but truly awful, yet the OP is concerned with how easy it will be for him to date.

Makes me a bit 🤔

yes women will date him, there is desperate ones out there. My friend met a man who had 5 kids then got herself pregnant to him without his agreement! I felt sorry for him to be honest, although he should have had the snip after child number 3 IMO.

if he has assaulted you, then yes that will make women think twice. Make sure you press charges and that everyone knows what he did to you.

Sadly there are plenty of other fools out there. Everyone always blindly thinks they are the one who will tame a bloke like this.

Sorry op but there probably will be someone but what you have to realise is that they won’t genuinely be happy . My ex is a raging alcoholic and still managed to remarry but he’s put her through far worse than he did me , he tied to kill her and the kids by trying to crash the car a few weeks ago but she still stays. Can’t imagine she’s happy though. There’s always someone naive / desperate enough.

And he’s on bail for assaulting me and our toddler so isn’t allowed to see ours

This is the reason all but the most desperate won’t be interested, not the fact he has had multiple children from previous relationships that don’t impact on how he lives his life…. Obviously they need to know that and he’ll doubtless won’t tell them on the first date!

Exactly.

He will be talking about his 'crazy ex' who turned his kids against him and paint himself as the victim.

There is always a woman gullible enough to fall for that type of guys.

OP I would just focus on the fact that you are well rid of that violent loser and focus on building your own, happy life with your kids.

OP, stop concentrating on him, and look forward to your own life.

But assaulting the OP, and even worse their toddler, most definitely is!

Also, I’m astonished by the misogyny on this thread. Some men are really good at spinning a lie. It’s not always because women are ‘gullible’ and ‘stupid’ 🤦‍♀️

He’ll end up with 10 kids and 4 crazy exes. You’ll end up with 2 kids who love and respect you and have healed from the trauma of this relationship with your love and support. I know what I’d choose.

Actually my ex and I were in exactly the same scenario, 5 kids, and he met his now partner within a month of us ending. He did change a lot for the better and they are now married but she really did put up with a lot! Im still alone!!! I think when someone is handsome, women give them a whole lot of breaks!

He probably will find someone.
You still found him a catch when he had 3 children he barely seen, I’m sure another woman will come along next and thing it’s going to be different with her too.

How many times does a person have to show you who they are before they are beleived

Can we please retire the phrases 'baby mama' and 'baby daddy'? It makes women sound utterly thick.

I don’t doubt how vile and detestable he is. However, can we focus on you and your healing rather than continuing to give this piece of shit head space?

Every time you feel a thought of him entering your head you say “stop right there! You aren’t coming in.” and you dismiss it.

Instead think about what is happening with you and your DC. Small changes, big changes. Making a safe and secure environment for everyone.

Good luck.

Even the brightest of women can get taken in
My bff (rich family, three past husbands, big business) has been mooning after a swaggering arse.
Four children by three different women. Two he's not allowed to see.
Quite pretty i'll grant you but she didn't even know the two youngest existed until they moved in together.
They spilt up last year and he married another sucker. However she's now a 'close friend'. He's definitely after her cash because she paid for everything.
Any man that can hurt a child needs stringing up in my opinion. You're well shot.

I’ve already said he saw his older children regularly whilst we were together.

I am trying to focus on myself and the kids but it’s like a kind of grief. I’m grieving the family I thought I’d have. We’re still seeing ex-SC thankfully.