So angry what is wrong with some parents

[fumingrightnow1]

My dd14 was supposed to be sleeping at a friend's tonight. They have had an argument and she said let's just leave it and go to sleep her friend told her she had to leave so she's walked home and just come in the door at gone 10pm. I can't believe the mum didn't step in and do anything or let me know and I would've got her. I've said to dd why didn't you call me but she just shrugged and said she was fine walking and didn't want to stand outside waiting for me. Its about a 10 minute walk. I don't let her out on her own at this time of night. As a parent i would have stepped in and can't believe this other mum did nothing.

Are your sure the mam is aware she left yet?

Did the other mum know your daughter was leaving ? Your daughter could have called you to let you know so maybe you should be annoyed with her too.

I mean l would assume the mum didn't know she had left..but a 10min walk is fine surley for a 14 year old.

Its not that late

The mother likely didn’t know
why didn’t your daughter message you?

Does your daughter not have a phone?
She could have called you, she didn’t

If she was even aware that her DD was chucking yours out, then yes, she should have stepped in. On the other hand, your DD knows full well she isn’t allowed out that late. Are you as angry with her as you are with her friend’s mum?

She’s a 14 year old child walking home at 10pm in the dark?

Yeah this would upset and annoy me too

I bet the other Mum didn’t know though

I would text the mum and ask why she didn't let you know. What if she was kidnapped? You would of never known she was missing.

So the op needs to explain to her daughter that she shouldn’t be doing that
Her daughter chose not to ring her

And the mum will say…

”I had no idea she had stormed out. Why didn’t she call you? Her mother?”

The mum apparently walked in bedroom when friend was shouting at dd to get out and dd was crying and just shouted whats going on and when friend said she wanted dd to leave mum just tutted huffed and walked out. So I assume she heard it all neither girl is calm or quiet.

For 10 mins?

Oh dear. That does change things a bit then.

Do you know the mum to speak to?

This is all your daughter’s version

That's terrible she should of at least made sure she got home okay.

I'm not happy with dd for not calling me and I will be having a proper conversation with her tomorrow about that but right now im more annoyed with the adult in the situation.

Tutted, huffed and walked out does not necessarily mean she was aware you’re daughter actually left the house though.

Your daughter was kicked out (supposedly)
the mother apparently knew and didn’t care (supposedly)
your daughter was distraught

she didn’t call you Op. I would be focussed on that

Phone the mother and tell her you thought that she should know your DD arrived home safely. Her response will be very telling.

I don't know her well. I've seen her a couple of times. I'm going to see if i can find her on Facebook and message her

She’s home safe and sound is the main thing now. Next time make sure she knows to call you. Can’t say much about other mum because maybe she wouldn’t mind her daughter out at that time.

Sure your DD did a silly thing but was probably upset. Like you I am shocked that the Mum let her leave on her own.

In her position I would have first tried to calm things down between the girls. If they really weren't going to make up though my next suggestion would be to make up a spare bed in another room for your DD. If your DD was still adamant she wanted to go I would have either called you (preferable) or run her home myself.

When DD was a teenager if she had a party or friends over, either DH or I drove them home afterwards and waited to see they had got safely in the house.

Good idea but I would stick to something simple like “thought you would be worrying so just wanted to let you know that dd arrived home safe”

Let her have a think about it