Disney loving men

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What are you thoughts on Disney loving men? It’s one of the things that contributed to my divorce I would say. Am I wrong here?

his obsession really got out of control in the end and it Really put me off. He was spending money on this hobby. A middle aged man tweeting about princess movies and obsessing over Mickey Mouse. He’s into other stuff that is similar but would be too outing to discuss. When he likes something he REALLY likes it.

we do have kids that show a moderate interest in Disney, I would say a normal level for kids. they are actually older and kinda moving away from it now anyway.

would this put you off? Or was I unreasonable?

The problem is when you spend so much of your time dissociating into a hobbie or a fandom that it affects your real life, relationships and ability to function as an adult. If you're buying merchandise before you pay your bills or feed your kids or if your parasocial relationship with Mickey Mouse is more of a priority than your relationship with your spouse then you've got serious problems.

There's a difference between disliking something morally (because it causes harm to animals) and being nasty about people who just happen to have a different interest to you, though.

I think adults being obsessed with Disney in the first place is odd, but plain weird for a man

I don't know - I've said I'd never be nasty if I met them. We certainly wouldn't have much of a basis for a friendship, though!

In life we need to be respectful, yes. But here, we are allowed to say what we really think and I think an adult who adores (notice, I don't say 'likes' - that, I get) but absolutely adores, Disney, is frankly bizarre. I would give them a massive swerve but very politely.

Tbh - if a child was showing that level of obsession with Disney I'd take steps as a parent to distract them with other interests.

Fair enough, it just seems very narrow-minded to me.

Considering we as a nation have a king riding in a golden carriage and are obsessed with a real princess and what she wears or says on a daily basis… I’m not sure being into Disney princesses is much weirder.

Not a huge fan of Disney obsessed women either.

I didn’t say they do give a shit. I said I can’t take them seriously. Obviously some people love them. Everyone is different. I think they are particularly naff, tacky, chavy and just awful.

Er…who’s obsessed with a real princess? You are making things up. No-one’s been obsessed with a real princess since Saint Diana of Althorp.

If you mean the P o W - well yes - she is real, isn’t she?🙄🙄

I’d rather have “naff and tacky” interests than be so narrow minded and unkind about what someone else enjoys.

No different to any other hobbies? What's the big deal? I didn't know there was a rule that only kids can like Disney 😂 they make most of their money off adults

My husband and I love Disney, as do our kids. We have a figures round the house that we have bought from our trips and the odd hoodie with a character on I might wear at the gym.

We also love going on a Disney holiday, it’s fun and enjoyable for the kids and yes maybe a bit of an escapism from the depressing world we are living in at the moment. Would much rather that then cook on a sun bed drinking all day at an all inclusive resort… that would give me the ick!

Personally I couldn’t care what anyone says and actually think it’s slightly depressing how much people care about what other think of them nowadays.

Also, we both adult perfectly fine, both have high earning jobs and parent our children perfectly well.

Is it an obsession? No, probably not, it doesn’t run our lives and we don’t talk about it every single day. Do we love it and sometimes happily watch a vlog or talk about when we can afford our next trip? Absolutely.

I do echo what others have said that don’t knock a Disney holiday until you have tried it. I have seen plenty of people say their husbands have just gone to keep their wives and kids happy and they have loved it so much they book another trip soon after.

obviously to the OP, the obsession here is quite intense and you are within your right to end the marriage. However, the important thing you have mentioned is he’s a great dad. Surely that’s the only thing you need to give a shit about now you are not together! Much rather a Disney loving great dad, than an absolute asshole dad that likes golf or something like that. Move on with your life and let him move on with his without slandering him on a public forum!

Another one popping on to suggest he is ND. It's a strong possibility given your DS is. His family also sound the same.

Hyper fixation is very common for ND people. It could be a short obsession for a few days or span a life time. IMO, for me anyway, I think it's a distraction from the pain and pressure of real life, it's something which you take 'control' of e.g. choose the direction, pick specifics etc, in a world which is often confusing and unpredictable.

Disney is associated with fantasy, cosiness, warmth etc. I can see the appeal, but man, it's so expensive. Getting into debt and ignoring real life responsibilities is not acceptable.

I'm in the adult women obsessed with Disney are pretty weird too category, but a man obsessed with them - I'd wonder what else is going on.

I try to avoid Disney Adults in general if I'm honest.
I had friends who had a membership to Disneyland when I was living in Paris, but they weren't really Disney Adults, it was all about the rides and the burgers & milk-shakes in Annette's. I've been many times, loved it, and I absolutely don't care about Disney, but the rides were cool and it was a good day out on a budget (provided you have an annual membership of course)

For me a Disney Adult is someone who knows and sings the songs, collects pins and other expensive collectibles like that, and, even worse, would reenact the dialogues.

Now, if I have to choose between Disney Adults or Peaky Blinders' Thomas Shelby fanboys, I would pick the Disney Adults anytime.

Adults and Children themes are I thought weird. Disney, Harry P etc.
But I did get drawn into the 2nd half of 'Beauty and The Beast' with actors.
In my defence that is part of an older legend and the Beast Actor was very good.

Any hobby or job that takes precidence over the marriage relationship is difficult for the spouse.

Dog
Trainwatching
Old car
Dungeons and Dragons
Alcohol
Exercising
Porn
Gambling
Harry Potter
Reading
Smoking
A religion

Hobbies are delightful and add purpose and enjoyment if not all consuming.

You were right to leave a person who thought you were superfluous to his existance due to Disney Addiction.

And let's be honest if someone who you were dating openly told you that you'd maybe get 5 good years of a reciprocal relationship before they lost interest in you and went back to their obsession you'd run a mile.

@Tuba437

You make fair points but you’re talking about liking Disney as an adult. OP’s husband has an all-consuming obsession, which is different.

Call me sexist but I’d find the particular focus on Disney Princesses very creepy for a man. For something aimed at pre-pubescent girls, that would be weird.

My FIL (intelligent man - professional scientist) had grown up in the early years of Disney and had a lifelong interest but it was an adult interest in, say the technology of the animation and the history of the studio. I didn’t find that creepy.

Have you read all the comments on this thread? I think the general consensus is Disney obsessed adults regardless of sex are a bit odd. Like someone else said MN is where you can be brutally honest and say what you really think without holding back. Obviously in real life we would all keep these opinions to ourselves when coming across a Disney obsessed adult. Everyone judges, come on, there must be things in life you can’t abide too.

Yep, I’ve read the thread and mostly it’s just depressing and full of people who thinks it’s acceptable to shit on what makes other people happy.

There’s a difference between not liking something and openly verbalising it to the point that you’re calling someone weird, odd and (as other posters have said) in need of some kind of intervention simply because they like something you don’t.

I don’t think calling Disney loving adults weird and/or odd on a thread is a problem. It’s not something people would necessarily say in rl, but come on! It’s what the vast majority of people privately think.

Well, I’m glad I’m not part of that majority. What a horrible thing to admit to.

For me it's not that it's Disney it's that for many people it's an all consuming hobby that takes over and doesn't leave enough room for anything else. That's a problem if the person also wants do things like seek out a romantic partner and start a family or maintain meaningful relationships with a range of friends and relatives. It can limit their ability to manage financially if they are addicted to buying merchandise.

Obviously people are free to live how they want but this is really dysfunctional. There needs to be compassion for those with disabilities or mental health struggles but let's not pretend that this is normal adult behaviour.

I think people are reacting slightly differently because it's Disney than they would be if he had an obsession about something traditionally 'male' like cars or motorbikes. But I do also think it's an ND trait when it's a fixation to this level and if it wasn't Disney it would be something else equally difficult to live with.

So I think you were right to separate, but not to tell everyone it's because of his Disney obsession - it's his behaviour in general that was the problem.