To find it weird when whole families turn up to kids parties

[CarmexQueen]

When did it become the norm to turn up to a young child's party with both parents & siblings?

What ever happened to drop and go or if they are too young for that, one parent brings the child.

It seems that lots of people treat kids parties like a family day out these days. The last few I've been to had more adults than children!

Aibu to find this weird? Why would the other parent or carer not stay home with the uninvited siblings instead of forcing them on the bday child and organisers.

Not every time no. My dd is at nursery - I don’t know who half the kids are never mind the parents. But still the invites come home with her and so I take her. Sometimes I’ll go alone and other times Dh will come too. Its very common and happened at my own daughter’s party - I’d say at least half of the kids that turned up had two parents with them. If it’s a spacious venue it doesn’t bother me in the slightest, parents don’t generally eat so other than making a few extra coffees it was no fuss. The only issue was it made the hall feel slightly crowded but not dramatically so.

If it was someone’s home it would be different. I also didn’t mind that a few siblings turned up to my dds party - the parents pre warned me, I did a few extra party bags. I really don’t know why people get so worked up over these things.

Totally unheard of when my son was a child in the 80's. Birthday parties were strictly for children, not adults. If any parent had stayed it would've been viewed as odd. If two parents had stayed it would've been viewed as very, very odd. Most adults would shudder at the thought to be honest. But then kids didn't generally have birthday parties when they were toddlers, except for perhaps a little gathering in their own home with mum, granny and a cake. Otherwise kids birthday parties started when they were school age (4 or 5 years old) with the host parent(s) managing the kids. The invited kids' parents definitely dropped and ran and definitely didn't bring siblings.

Then don’t invite twenty young children to a trampoline park.

Our surgery waiting room was unusually full this morning, until the doctor called for John Smith. Grandparents and young boy stood up plus a younger woman I presumed was the mother of the boy. So GP appointments are now a family day out, like A&E.

Only time we both went to a children’s party was when we were invited. It does rather seem that no one is allowed to miss out nowadays. Posters saying that they don’t see their child enough because they work and so miss out on seeing them enjoying themselves or having family time. So, what you do is invite your child’s friend families to your home. Feed them, entertain them and watch them having fun, all at your expense and in your time. It’s very simple really.

When my kids were younger, I always made it clear in the invitation if it was a drop and run type thing.
Once the kids were old enough to be dropped, if it was a party at our house I'd include the "drop off" and "pick up" times explicitly in the invitation.
Usually, I would also add a line to the invitation like "parents and siblings are welcome to join us for a drink and slice of cake when you come to collect your child".
If it was an outside place, like a soft-play, I'd just state whether or not there was space for parents to hang out while the party was ongoing. If I was inviting siblings and paying for them, I'd say so by clearly naming them in the invitation. I don't remember ever having problems with hangers on or uninvited guests...

Forgot to add, it's entitled and rude to assume an invitation addressed to one person - the child invited to the party - is actually extended to the entire family. If you want to come along and treat it like a family event, you should check first. My house was far too small to be able to cope with 3 additional guests per invited child!

There's an unwritten rule isn't there, one parent stays while they are v young and supervises their child, stands behind them when they get their food etc. As they get to 6/7 ish the invitations start specifying it's okay to drop and run or similar. Also depends on the type of party. I went to a village hall party with a bouncy castle and a load of five year olds, no way did that parent want thirty five year olds to supervise and feed by herself.

I agree taking other siblings is a bit cheeky but obviously they won't be part of the party, eat the food etc. And parents to understand that sometimes it's inevitable or the invited child wouldn't be able to attend.

Sometimes it's inevitable or the invited child wouldn't be able to attend.

Then the child doesn't attend? Your DC is not the reason for the party and it can happen without their presence.. nothing inevitable about it!

We go together because we love being together on the weekends; we only have 1 child and we love being the three of us. Think its odd you care tbh

It’s extremely rude op I’ve never understood why family’s are joined at the hip. I picked my 9 year old up from a party at the weekend and a whole family ( mum dad and 3 siblings) got out of the car to go into the venue and pick up their kid, instead of one parent going in while the others waited in the car! Mental behaviour

Did you know those people?

Our friends would usually come as a family. Add in some grandparents/uncles/aunts and you would have more adults than children.

Kids' friend from nursery etc, I would expect 1 parent.

Not everyone is in that position though to be able to feed and make party bags for an extra 20 kids.
I always used to welcome the siblings and provide a party bag for them if I knew they were coming but that isn’t always possible for some to do

Ours are in reception. Pretty much all the parties have been at someone’s house or in the park. The invites are always extended to the family in this scenario. It’s been really lovely getting to chat to the parents as most didn’t know each other from nursery. They’ve all been really good fun, food and drink has been provided for adults and children (nothing major, just some nibbles and a glass of wine/beer/soft drinks for the adults plus the usual kids drinks and party food). We all look forward to them and have made some great parent friends. All the parents work, so I think people appreciate being able to be together as a family, with the bonus of the children being entertained and having some adult conversation.

The problem is the parents of these extra kids expect them to also be fed and given party bags and entertained too!!

As a bossy teacher, I always sent everyone away

I'm with you OP. I have plenty of frie, so need to hang out at kids parties to make more. One of us goes to the party, the other one stays home and either does jobs or has a relax, depending on what the week is looking like.
If it's a trampoline park or suchlike we'd take the other child and pay them in, but never ask to take them to a village hall type party.
But then I'm a fully functioning adult who isn't glued to my DH.

YANBU.

It's really peculiar behaviour But the world is full of oddbods.

The purpose of a child's party is not for you. It's for the children. I can't believe the lack of self awareness and entitlement in your post.

This shouldn't need saying but unless your whole family has been explicitly invited, your whole family is NOT invited

I’m happy to pay for a few siblings, yes - not all children have siblings, and not all parents will being siblings. If costs were a big issue, I would ask that the parents pay for siblings.

Spoken by someone completely isolated from the realities and the 'going rate' of children's parties in parts of the UK in 2026.

Would it be considered rude to put 'No siblings and no co-dependent couples need attend' on the invitations?

How will you get to know anyone if you go to a group event to chat to your own partner! I agree people who do this seem quite codependent/stand out as being a bit strange.

That’s completely fine regardless of your DH being a carer, it’s when the invited child come and so does their siblings which is especially awkward when some places have limit on the amount of children allowed to attend for safety reasons and when their is only enough food for those children invited