To un-invite friend from dinner after she sent me message by mistake - Update

[Dinnertext]

Hi all, my previous thread closed before I had the chance to add any further post today. For those interested, my friend replied to my message where I said I was upset she hadn’t apologised.

She ignored that part, and basically demanded I re-invite her on Saturday because it’s too late for her to make any alternative plans and it’s unfair to expect her to spend the evening alone. She reiterated the takeaway ‘offer’ and said as far as she is concerned , my Husband has said she’s still more than welcome to attend.

DH has just repeated the same position in that he’s staying out of it and that he wouldn’t turn anyone away at the door. He has basically told me this evening to be the bigger person and draw a line under it and not risk ruining his and his friends evening.

Better get back to work. It's a good job I wfh in our own business so can pop in and out of a thread if it sparks my interest.

No way should you be leaving your own home to accommodate cheeky bitch friend! I'd stand at the door and refuse her entry, tbh.

That woman's got some bold faced cheek, but your husbands a complete pussy! He doesnt need to get involved but he should text the bloke to say "Sarah's saying she fancies a night to herself now - can I come to you instead for the game?"

Iv missed the end of the last thread..can anyone give me the link or tell me what's happened please ?

Every so often I read a thread on MN that blows my mind. This is one of those OP. So your “friend” has been gossiping about the food you buy/your cooking behind your back, has not apologised for that rightly upsetting you, and is now demanding that you still host her in your house?

And your husband cares so little about you that he’s demanding you go along with this so he doesn’t have to spend money on a couple of pints in a pub?

And your response is to give this woman, her husband and your husband the run of your own home while you hide at your mother’s? Does that not sound insane to you?

Both the "friend" and husband are out of order. That being said, if your husband won't back you its a bigger issue and not going to be solved in a weekend.

To the friend I'd say "It's clear you were being rude about me, wont apologise and now want to make me even more uncomfortable by turning up at my house. I'm not happy to host you and don't want you in my home. I'm sitting Saturday out and taking a step back from this friendship".

To your husband I'd be acknowledging that I can't control who he invites over, but that inviting someone who upset me and refuses to apologise is categorically not staying out of it. That his attitude of "typical women's drama" is a misogynistic cop out. That he could instead go to theirs, or meet somewhere neutral. That if the tables were turned you would at least tell your friend her partner was out of order and should apologise. That you've seen him in a new (selfish, pathetic and weak) light.

Only you can decide if this is an "agree to disagree" moment in your relationship or a "sign of a bigger issue" light bulb.