Wedding make up too early - bridesmaid dilemma

[saminamama]

Being bridesmaid for a dear friend of 12 years

of 6 bridesmaids 2 of us are staying in the hotel.
it is the first night with my DH away from both children during a really stressful phase in our life financially (youngest is 10 months old) and so booked the hotel of the wedding (I paid for this)

when I agreed to have makeup done (me to pay for this - £60) I didn’t realise I would be put on the very first slot - 7am. The maid of honor is in hair at this time because she also booked the hotel, but some of the other bridesmaids aren’t getting anything done until 9 or even 10am!

i have asked the bride to cancel but she has said no it’s too late I still need to pay,

so I’m still going to have to pay

so because I have booked ‘the hotel’ I have ended up pulling the short straw if I was in the premier inn up the road it would have been fine

aibu - get the makeup done and crack on at 7am
yanbu - pay and don’t get the makeup done value sleep instead

It’s 7am and your ‘dear friends wedding.’

Not 3am and someone you barely know.

7am is hardly early and I doubt the makeup artist is going to be sitting around between 7:30 and 9 waiting for others to arrive. Stop causing bride another headache (there’s almost certainly more than enough causing her stress already), smile and suck it up.

If you really can't get out of getting your make-up done early have a chat with the makeup artist. They should be able to give you tips for the day and maybe even have some samples for touch ups. Professional makeup should last well into the day anyway especially with the modern long lasting formulas.

Is The problem that you think your make up won’t last or you need to get up early. My DD had the first slot for make up as a bridesmaid for her friend and it was 5.30am. At least you can look fab at breakfast!

Well someone needs to be first and you’re not the only one.
You’re making a bit of an unnecessary drama over this, your night away from your kids is irrelevant. It’s one day, what’s wrong with just sucking it up for your friend?

6 bridesmaids plus bride. The make up artist will definitely be busy the whole morning but with that number it was always going to be an early start and someone has to go first I’m afraid.

also what time were you planning on sleeping in until that day?

you can wake up at 06:30, have a quick shower and be in the chair by 7am. You can go to bed at a decent time and have 8-9 hours sleep.

Good morning op, you're obviously wide awake. Go get your make up done!
I would see it as massive treat especially if things are rough financially. I've never had my make up done professionally.
Go and enjoy the experience and look fabulous!
Have an amazing day, you'll sleep well tonight!

Someone has to go first, OP. Why wouldn’t it be you?

It’s one day. I don’t see the issue. in my experience the bridal party always has to start getting ready pretty early. They need to ensure they leave plenty of time to get the bride ready.

Also, don’t create unnecessary drama at the last minute for your friend. If you’re in the same hotel just wake up at 6.30, have a shower and go to the room in your dressing gown to get your make up done.

I do get that it’s not only about a 7am make up slot. Presume you’ll need to wash and dry your hair before getting the make up done so you’ll be doing that at 6am so - no, actually, still think you’re U. You are sleeping at the wedding venue so have no travel. Get an early night and see it as a lovely day starting early, so more to enjoy.

Just get the makeup done. 7am on the morning of the wedding is ok. At least you be ready in plenty of time and be able to help with other wedding bits

To me this slot is not an issue but a friend making me pay for my makeup for their wedding is not dear

I would do my own or pull out, the idea is ridiculous

That’s pretty normal for wedding make up, what is your issue?

Sorry I don’t get the issue of the time or being away from kids?

But the bride is not kid for making you pay for the hotel and the makeup.

If you want to try and get out of it, then the financial struggle is the reason you need to give. Not the time.

The time I guess is not really unreasonable although I get why you’re annoyed, we recently had our first weekend away from DS and I’d not have been getting up before 7am for anyone. It would have been nice if she’d made an allowance for you to have a later start, but I assume from the fact you’re paying for your own make-up that she’s not big on that.

Why would it be kind to prioritise OP over everyone else though?
Most other girls are travelling from further away, therefore likely waking at the same time as OP even if their makeup is at 9am, the bride is trying to be considerate of everyone’s start time.

Honestly i wouldn’t stress over it too much

When I was MOH at my best friend's wedding my slot was 6:30am as we'd stayed at the hotel the night before, it's earning than I get up for work, but it's her day and that's the schedule that worked. Me being ready first also helped as there were a few things that needed coordinating on the day that I could intercept. Surely you will get the lie in with your husband the morning after the wedding? (I didn't as my mum and dad were guests and brought DS who was also in the bridal party)

It depends. There’s no way I’d want my makeup done at 7am, so I’d cancel the slot and lose the money. But I’m good at makeup, so it wouldn’t be a problem.

If you do go ahead, at least you know it’ll last, because setting sprays are so good now.

You're posting at 6.24 so waking up early isn't an issue. With six bridesmaids plus the bride and possibly the mothers too, yeah, it'll need an early start. You've surely done early starts before?

However, you shouldn't be paying for it.

It just isn’t about you. It’s 7am not the middle of the night. Get up, put a happy face on and get excited about looking beautiful and supporting your friend. It might do you good OP. We are all different but with a 10 month and 3 year old, I’d completely lost myself to being at mum at that point so embrace it.

Yabu

Its booked and paid for now. You say its a stressful time financially, don't waste £60 just because you want a lie in.

Well that’s kind of the point isn’t it? OP’s first time staying away from her children, most people I’d imagine would like to enjoy at least a small lie-in.

For such a crowd of bridesmaids it would make sense to book two hair and make-up artists instead of starting at the crack of dawn on an already very long day.

I had my make up done at 6:30 and hair at 8am when I was a bridesmaid. Wedding started at 1pm. I was actually so glad to be in early and done, as there were 6/7 people having make up and the last couple of bridesmaids had to be rushed through as the time had run over so it all felt a bit panicky towards the end. Whereas I’d been fully ready for ages and sat around chatting to everyone who wasn’t in makeup. Didn’t have to pay for it though..

Been a bridesmaid a number of times, and I think that time sounds about right. I guess someone has to go first in hair and makeup 🤷‍♀️ there will be another bridesmaid with the 7am hair slot.
I think; it’s one day. Just suck it up and enjoy the day for what it is.

I would be messaging all the other bridesmaids to see if any early birds would swap. If not, I would be doing my own make up at a more civilised hour and wouldn't care if it looked shite.