Step mums comment regarding tanning beds has upset me

[TScarv]

I went for some food last night with my dad and step mum, I asked them if they’ve been away recently because they look very tanned, and they said no, they’ve just been using the tanning beds. My partner said he has never been on them but he might go on a few times before holiday so that he doesn’t burn, to which I replied that I don’t think it’s a good idea and he’d be best just protecting his skin in the sun. My dad said “you don’t like sun beds do you?” And I said no, they scare me. My step mum then said “I don’t care, it’s worth it”

AIBU to be a bit upset by this? Surely no one actually thinks that having a tan is worth getting skin cancer? Would she still have that same opinion if she’s hit with a melanoma diagnosis in the future? I didn’t say anything because it’s up to them what they want to do, and nothing to do with me. But the comment had upset me/annoyed me because I can’t wrap my head around how they value a tan over their skin health or life? Do people just not view skin cancer as important?

my grandma has smoked all her life and my dad has always begged her to stop but she didn’t. She now has COPD and is in a bad way and my dad is angry at her for not stopping years ago. But yet he’s messing with tanning beds?? How does that make sense?

A lady I work with , 49 , used sun beds all her life up until about 5/6 years ago .
Obviously skin cancer would be the biggest thing to worry about , but secondly then it ruins your skin , her neck is all crepey & she has far more wrinkles & lines than other women her age .
She eats healthily, doesn’t smoke, definitely not a big drinker .
Sun beds should be illegal.

Tanning is literally the process of turning a skin into leather. They are foolish but it is a waste of your energy to be excessively upset by it, OP. You've already recognised that they are adults who are free to make their own choices.

I’ve had nhs treatment for a skin condition using sun beds which I was surprised by, but they started off at 2minute sessions and up to 12 minutes eventually the skin condition cleared but as soon as I stopped it returned so I refused any more. One of the first sessions of only 2 minutes burnt me so the damage is real and can happen so quickly

It fries my brain that anyone would use a sun bed given the risks but loads of people do! I got to a fitness class and there are a lot of women well into 60s/70s using them to ‘get a tan’. Bonkers!

It isn’t just the obvious dangers but why would anyone want wrinkly skin and a saggy neck? The same people using sun beds are probably spending a fortune on creams and supplements. It’s ridiculous! I am in my 50s with no wrinkles yet, I’ve actively avoided the sun for 20 years due to melanoma. I know ageing is inevitable but assuming the reason for using a sun bed is vanity related, why the fuck accelerate the aging process?

Factor 50 applied every 30 minutes is safer. There’s nothing you can do, though. Let them do what they wish.

Shes probably old school mentality where they just don't comprehend the risks. When I was younger (I'm 44) my mum encouraged me to use the sun bed before a holiday to prepare skin to get a better tan!! Horrifying thinking about it now considering I'm very pale and always burn

I wouldn’t be upset, but when she’s having a suspicious mole removed I’d be revisiting that conversation so you can say you told her so.

There is no such thing as a safe ‘base tan’. There is no such thing as a safe tan.

Any tan, even without any burning, still causes DNA damage.

I wouldnt be upset op over your step mum's comment but you are right not to use them.
I used sunbeds in my twenties and early thirties. 3 times a week. So I was the extreme. I had skin cancer and had it removed twice on my legs. Skin grafts were painful.
Thankfully all ok but it is a worry. I am in my mid fifties now and would never have another sunbed again and will protect my skin. I have drummed it into my dc's. It is not worth it. It is like most things, you dont think it will ever happen to you as I always said to myself and than it did. I understand you are concerned but they wont listen to you as I was the same.

Yabu to be upset by this comment as it is their choice to use tanning beds, and they are legal. However, I do agree with you OP, they’re not good for your health, but it’s the same for a lot of things, smoking, vaping, alcohol, junk food, sugar… these things are legal too and the risks are well known. It’s down to personal choice.