Invited the wrong child by mistake

[Oopsididitnotagain]

What to do-if anything?

Dd is having a party at a play place, ten children including herself, allowed. It was hard for her to narrow down her invites as she likes so many in the class and also has family friends to include.
I asked the class representative to please send me a list of the children & parents names & numbers. I made a group invite and sent via WhatsApp. One mum has replied to say her child can come-a boy Dd likes, but isn’t particularly close to, all the other children are girls, aside from one family friend, another boy. It was obviously a mixed up number, I thought I was sending the invite to one of her best friends.

Dd is disappointed and I think the mum was a little surprised too 🫣

Would you do anything?

Hopefully one of the invited girls will say they can’t go and the originally intended boy (with the same name?! 😂) can come too. I suppose if he’s a family friend rather than a school friend you could do something separate with him? See if anyone drops out first I guess!

You could try my DD included him but I now realise he will be the only boy will he be OK with that.

Of course DD may spill the beans at school and say what an idiot her mum is inviting the wrong child and spoiling her party, you really have to invite the best friend one way or another.

You can't uninvite the boy, that's really cruel. Surely you can squeeze one more child into the party?

I had a situation once where I had invited 9 boys and 3 girls - and only one of the girls was able to come.
We had intended to invite her but I let the mum know she was the only girl.
So I might tell the mum that he would be the only boy (no need to explain why, just that it "happened") as a heads up. And if someone else can't make it, I'd add the missing girl. (I'd try to add missing girl anyway and suck up the cost).

(I remember DS getting the funnest present from the one girl, he still has it 10 years later!)

I'd invite other friends to.come for a play date instead.

Find the money for one extra child - how expensive is this place? People saying explain to the mum. She will probably understand but what about the boy? He's probably excited, like any child is when they've been invited to a party (even a girls party). Can you imagine how crushed he will feel?

But he won’t be the only boy, and he could end up finding that out if he hears the girls talking about the party in school afterwards, so why lie?

This. You dont have to explain that it was a mistake, just say "i just wanted to let you know that we've had the rsvps back and X will be the only boy from school going. Of course he is still very welcome but I just wanted to give you the heads up, as I know sometimes they care about that stuff at their age! If he doesnt fancy it we wont be offended if he wants to pull out, but if hes still up for it we look forward to seeing you on x day!"

Ideally speak to her in person rather than text.

If he still wants to come i think you have to suck it up unfortunately.

Only boy from the class, sorry.
No lie.

Best idea I think.

Maybe he could have learned to play with girls whilst there? My eight year old girl will play with boys. He might have had fun.

FHB .... family hold back!

I think it’s solvable, explain that there was an error in thr number list as dd meant to invite girl school friends only.

Was the error yours or the list sender’s?

I would my hands up with the mum explain what has happened and who is coming. Tell her he is more than welcome to come but if he doesn't want to please don't feel obligate to say yes.
Then I would work out whether it's best to have the family friend there or the best friend.

What is your usual contact with the school parents? We have a WhatsApp group for the class and I then saved everyone's number as parent name, child's name. It helps with play dates and making sure I'm talking to the right parents!

You can’t uninvite him that would be cruel. Can’t you add just one more surely it wouldn’t be that more expensive. How would your DD feel if she was suddenly uninvited knowing that others were there. Lesson learned I’d say be more careful next time

This.

Same !

It'll be ok seeing as no other boy is going

Just explain it

Would be silky to have him come and your daughter's friend miss out

You can't uninvite him and if your DD doesn't get to invite her best friend, that might cause some problems for her too, no small child is going to buy 'my mum accidentally invited the wrong person' so she'll be upset.

Then tell the accidental invite kids mum whats happened and hopefully, knowing none of the other boys are going, he will decline. If not, you'll have to cough up for one extra but it was your error so that seems fair really!

I honestly would try to shell out to do this if at all possible (assuming no-one declines). You can't uninvite the boy, that would be unkind, but its really sad for dd not to get one of her best friends there.

I really wouldn't . . .

If money was tight I'd ask the family friends to pay their own way - say sorry, you've ended up having to invite more children, classroom politics, you know how it is, you'll take them out for a pint or something to say thanks later. Ask at least one other child the extra kid is friends with too. Don't get too het up about boys and girls at 7, mine were all still very happy to play in mixed groups until way later than that. Still are, really.

Phone up the events place tell them your mistake ask if you can pay the £40 extra or whatever in 4 weekly instalments or see if they will allow that one extra due to your oversight

If the child that was meant to be invited is dd’s best friend, I’d explain to her mum what’s happened and organise a sleepover or another activity just for the two of them

I would message his mum and say I’ve just realised he’s the only boy and there’s no space to add another, will he be ok with this? Hopefully he won’t and then the problems fixed for you.