AIBU to think my husband is a bit of a dick?

[FlamingoFloss]

I know in the grand scheme of things (and compared to other people and their issues) this may not be a thing, but it is to me. I went away last weekend for three nights. I feed a fox outside my house every single night. I have cats and I feed the fox any leftover food and I have been doing so for well over a year. if I don’t have enough leftover food then I’ve lots of cats food and so I make it up a little bit - my husband knows this. He doesn’t have a problem or he never has and is actually grateful I put the leftover food out rather than putting in the bin as it stops the flies.

So tonight I find out he did not feed the fox for the time that I was away because he doesn’t care apparently. I said to him he knows this is important to me and he said he just doesn’t care and that the cats are even lucky they got fed.

Who is this man who knows that this is a big deal for me and yet just didint even bother? and the fact he’s even said that about feeding our own pets????

Sorry OP but foxes should not be fed.

Cute to look at but not to be encouraged in an urban environment.

Doesn't do them or us any favours.

Stop feeding foxes. You’re not supposed to.

In regard to your husband’s comments about the cats being lucky they got fed - yes, he is a dick. He sounds very uncaring, and cruel actually. I’d be concerned about his general way of treating you, and how he would be with kids etc.

Had you asked him in advance to feed the fox? Did he agree and then just not do it?

People like you are the reason I wake up to fox shit on my decking every day and why my kids can’t leave their toys out in the garden overnight. My neighbours have even had them coming in the houses. Don’t feed the foxes! You move away and what happens then?

You are a bit a dick for feeding foxes.

He certainly shouldn't have said that about the cats. Was he serious?

Yes, he agreed he would feed the fox

Not up for debate

I’m not moving. Been here 15 years and no plans to move. No problem where we are and I’m not the reason you have fox poo in your garden

It’s shit of him to say he would do it and then just not do it, it’s like he’s done it just to spite you. I’d be more annoyed about that than the actual fox, it’s a wild animal and can find its own food so won’t have suffered. But your DH was rubbish

You should not feed wild animals

I'm not getting into the fix feeding debate.

but yes, your husband is a dick on several levels & I'd be looking at ending the marriage.

if doesn't bode well for your future together.

If you have kids I would assume he would extend the same lack of care to them as he does to your cats.

Regardless of whether people think it’s right or wrong to feed a fox - your husband is a dick either way. He knew it mattered to you and he didn’t do it even though it would have been no real effort for him.

I also think a lot of people have failed to notice that he also you were lucky that he even bothered to feed your own cats. He sounds like a cunt who deliberately wanted to upset you.

I’d be willing to be bet he has form for stuff like this.

This is what has upset me plus his utter lack of care amd concern. He literally said he didn’t give a damn - and I believe him.

Yes, he agreed he would feed the fox

He's a big fat liar then. What else does he say he'll do and then doesn't?

OTT. He sees feeding the animals a chore that’s all! So he fed the cats because he had to but reckoned the fox will sort himself out.

I agree it’s a chore. My dog doesn’t eat dog food (we’ve tried them all), except dog biscuits, so every night we have to cook rice, cabbage and chicken (or a variation of this), so yes, it’s a chore and he’s lucky we care enough to put this much effort in every night because we want to keep him alive. So he’s lucky and it’s a chore. Doesn’t make me vile to say that!

But you do it because you care, he didn’t say it was a chore he said he didn’t care.

I'm glad you're feeding the fox. Have you seen her/him since you got back?

Why are you cooking it every night? Batch cook. Freeze. Reheat.

Foxes catch and eat vermin such as mice and rats, except your house. Really dumb move. That foxes scent will be all over your place. If his little fox buddies find you, expect a vermin explosion as all of your cats are tame, too.

Good god, no, especially reading your responses, he really is not the dick here.

He fed the cats because he cared to the point of keeping them alive, even if he didn’t say so. The fox though was a bit of a stretch!

As I’ve already said, I’ve been feeding our fox for over a year. No issues with vermin

People feeding foxes around here led to my 8 year old rabbit being brutally murdered during the day when she had full access to hop around our garden. I keep all of my cats in now. My ferrets live in a double hutch outside and they’d give a fox a hell of a fight if every door wasn’t double latched. Do not encourage foxes. Doing so puts other people’s pets in danger. Give your head a wobble. My poor old girl didn’t deserve to go out like that in the safe space she’d had for 8 years.