Tipping waiting staff..

[JacknDiane]

Ive just read an article about football fans visiting the US and being frustrated at how expensive the tipping culture is over there. Its because US waiting staff are paid so little, the tips are meant to boost their wages. But visitors are saying the staff should be properly paid and its on businesses to ensure staff are properly paid, not on the customer to be expected to make up the wages shortfall. I think football fans from around the world are feeling the pinch in the US as they are getting ripped off anyway.

BUT its made me think. We dont eat out much here in the UK, its frankly expensive and not always great. But whenever we do eat out, I notice a service charge is always added automatically to the bill. And frankly it makes the bill quite a bit higher. Id love a cocktail with my dinner or lunch but I very very rarely have one, as they can be £8-£9 each. So I have either water or a soft drink. But then the bill comes and the tip is often £8-£9. That's the cocktail I usually deny myself. And it sort of pisses me off. I earn 25p over minimum wage. Dh isn't on much more. And im guessing the hospitality staff are on similar to me. Im in retail and I give customers good service . But I dont get tips and of course I dont expect tips. Yet waiting staff here get minimum wage and we still tip them 10% of the bill. So they'll be earning a whole lot more than me. Yet I feel mean if I dont tip.

What's the answer? Please bare in mind my earnings and how infrequently we eat out. Its a treat, and drinks are usually water or coke to keep costs down. Having a coffee at the end and sharing a dessert is a treat too.
Then the bill comes and im expected to tip someone better paid than me. The tip is always on the bill, gone are the days the tip feels optional.
And I know this isn't the waiting staff's fault. I know they dont make the rules and i know the tips are pooled between all staff working.
But it just feels too much when our budget is stretched to the limit. I also know ive tipped and the staff/ meal frankly weren't all that great. But I feel pressure when its on the bill.

Am I the only low waged person to feel like this?

In the US tipping is usually optionally so less awkward not to do it.

In the UK I think it should also be optional in restaurants- I prefer places where it is optional when you use the card machine.. as PPs have said, lots of people are on minimum wage but I don't tip the person at the till in a shop, etc

@ponyprincess Tipping in the USA is absolutely not optional. It’s expected and it’s 20% now. When did you last go there?

Why would you? If it is expected as part of eating there and clearly stated on the menu, don't eat there if you do not agree, eat elsewhere.

OR put on your big girl pants and make the choice of your own volition…and don’t worry, I don’t want you at my table.

You know it’s optional right? You have freedom of choice to refuse to pay it.

Do you tip everyone on minimum wage that serves you or only waiting staff. I find that odd tbh. But you are happy to tip or you wouldn't do it. No one is forcing you to, it's entirely your own choice.

If big tippers aren't happy about it then they should stop doing it. I don't know why you'd give money away if you didn't want to.

It isn't really optional unless you are tight or have very bad service.

Or shes learned to hide her feelings

Of course it's optional.

Are people stuck in the old days before minimum wage or something? We've had a minimum wage for over 25 years now. Waiting staff are no different to the retail assistants who run up and down the stairs getting the different size shoes for you to try on. Do you tip them?

It’s absolutely optional

Nah, she doesn’t give a fuck now.

That's the thing it's still optional even if the service is amazing and you are absolutely loaded - you will be massively unpopular but you can can refuse.
Calling people tight on the internet doesn't change that fact.

Recently- a tip was.not automatically added into the bill

Assuming you are in the UK, it is customary to tip the waiting staff in an eating establishment, but not in some other environments such as retail. If you have had a decent meal for two or more people then it is likely to have cost more than the waiter is paid for their entire shift, so it is a kindness to tip if the experience has been good.
You seem to struggle to understand why someone would tip if they don’t have to but most people don’t only act in their own best interests at all times.
I do actually tip my beautician as well as she is a young mother and I think you could use the extra money. Of course, I could keep it and spend it or save it myself but sometimes it’s nice to be kind to other people even when you don’t have to.
I still think that if you can afford to eat out regularly then you can afford to tip the waiting staff. People seem to be getting more selfish these days IMO

I'm not "low waged" but I hate the tipping culture in UK. I often ask for it to be removed from the bill and then if I think I've had good service I'll leave something in cash. Sometimes I won't.

In OPs position I would certainly not be leaving a tip. Have your cocktail OP.

Wrong. She does have a choice. We all have a choice. I ask for it to be removed and if I feel like it I will leave a cash tip. Often I don't.

It's not awkward either. I have been asked if everything is ok on a few occasions and I just say it's been "fine".

WAIT....You are paying service charge and tipping?? @ByWittyGoose

Tipping your hairdresser is expected in London?? First I heard of that.

WAIT....You are paying service charge and tipping??

It wasn't just the poster you named, @msmolli ... reading the replies it seems quite a number do this

Each to their own of course, but it wouldn't do for me; I'm fine with paying once providing they've offered a good experience, but not over and over again

Edited to add it's interesting that once again we've had a tipping thread with absolutely no explanation beyond "tradition" of why restaurant staff are tipped, but not others doing minimum wage jobs which require similar effort - especially when that tradition started well before the minimum wage

Some people on here seem to think service charge and tipping are different things.

What?

It certainly is optional. Look the word up in the dictionary.

The minimum wage rates in the Uk have just gone up in April. By 4.1% for those aged 21 and over and an 8.5% increase for workers aged 18 to 20. I haven’t had a salary in increase like that!

@msmolli I guess you haven’t been to the USA?!!! Try getting a tip removed there. Easier to climb Mount Everest!

The increase was less than £1 an hour.