Tipping waiting staff..

[JacknDiane]

Ive just read an article about football fans visiting the US and being frustrated at how expensive the tipping culture is over there. Its because US waiting staff are paid so little, the tips are meant to boost their wages. But visitors are saying the staff should be properly paid and its on businesses to ensure staff are properly paid, not on the customer to be expected to make up the wages shortfall. I think football fans from around the world are feeling the pinch in the US as they are getting ripped off anyway.

BUT its made me think. We dont eat out much here in the UK, its frankly expensive and not always great. But whenever we do eat out, I notice a service charge is always added automatically to the bill. And frankly it makes the bill quite a bit higher. Id love a cocktail with my dinner or lunch but I very very rarely have one, as they can be £8-£9 each. So I have either water or a soft drink. But then the bill comes and the tip is often £8-£9. That's the cocktail I usually deny myself. And it sort of pisses me off. I earn 25p over minimum wage. Dh isn't on much more. And im guessing the hospitality staff are on similar to me. Im in retail and I give customers good service . But I dont get tips and of course I dont expect tips. Yet waiting staff here get minimum wage and we still tip them 10% of the bill. So they'll be earning a whole lot more than me. Yet I feel mean if I dont tip.

What's the answer? Please bare in mind my earnings and how infrequently we eat out. Its a treat, and drinks are usually water or coke to keep costs down. Having a coffee at the end and sharing a dessert is a treat too.
Then the bill comes and im expected to tip someone better paid than me. The tip is always on the bill, gone are the days the tip feels optional.
And I know this isn't the waiting staff's fault. I know they dont make the rules and i know the tips are pooled between all staff working.
But it just feels too much when our budget is stretched to the limit. I also know ive tipped and the staff/ meal frankly weren't all that great. But I feel pressure when its on the bill.

Am I the only low waged person to feel like this?

Bump

I believe the service charge isn't compulsory and you don't have to pay it. But I personally wouldn't want the awkwardness, so I always do.

I generally tip waiting staff and hairdressers. I don't know why, it's habit. And I don't earn very much either, so I completely understand OP, as no-one tips me for typing letters nicely or getting my filing alphabetically correct.

Personally l hate that it's related to the amount you spend. Why is 'service' more expensive the higher the bill. After all you don't get an enhanced service.

service charge is usually pooled and then divided by the staff and given as a bonus, so removing it isn’t personal like it is with a tip

I understand how you in retail are customer facing and give great service, but for fraction of the time given in a dining experience

In the UK I don't tip waiting staff unless they have provided exceptional service.

A waiter is paid to take my order, bring it to me and check that everything is satisfactory. That is what they are paid to do and that does not require a tip.

Yes, they get minimum wage but so does the retail assistant that serves me in a shop and people in call centres or those working in offices. I don't tip any of them, for their service, I don't see why waiting staff are singled out for tips.

I've only been in two places that automatically added a tip so far and both times i asked for it to be removed. Eating out is not something we do often and dh will always leave a tip on the table if we've had good service.

With minimum wage I believe there is no reason for one job to get tips and others don’t. My husband likes to tip, I don’t. Even,as people say if the service is “exceptional “ it’s their job, they should do it well, same as everyone else.

I have tipped when I have gone as part of a large group, because in those occasions, the wait staff had a lot to deal with... and we have all put a bit in too. But this was back when you left the money on the table, and it was not not just added onto your bill anyway.
But just me and one other person... nope.

I finding tipping so scammy and annoying. Why tip a waiter or hairdresser and not the person in the post office, the cleaner at work or your refuse collectors? Makes no sense.

And in a COL crisis it’s unfair.

Just charge a fair price for your service and that’s it. I’d hate to be the states where you have to add a dollar on everything and several dollars extra if it’s a meal etc. it’s fine if money is no object, but if you’re counting the pennies it’s ridiculous.

I don't tip anyone or pay a service charge. I absolutely disagree with it and the onus should be on the employer to pay a decent wage, especially national chain type places.

Why should waiting staff be tipped, or a hairdresser, but not shop assistants for example? Its utterly bizarre!

I accept that if I went to the US I would be much more expected, but luckily I have no plans to visit any time soon.

Totally agree. Just came back from the US and everything basically ends up double the price after tax and tip. I did notice towards the end people selecting ‘no tip’ at coffee shops etc so I stopped tipping, felt a bit guilty about it though.

I think 12.5% (sometimes more) service charge is everywhere now! I wouldn’t remove it unless service was truly terrible but I definitely don’t agree we should have it here. I always select 0% on screens in coffee shops/non sit down meals etc.

I have asked for the service charge to be taken off a few times . Just be brazen and leave your own tip then if you want to

My sister does this, I just find it so awkward! Especially if they ask why 😭

it was my daughter who told me she asked for it to be taken off ! She’s only 12 and was with a group of her friends in a pasta restaurant abs they duly obliged so I took her lead lol . I find service charges so cheeky to be honest !

@peachyheadasking why?! Even worse 😂

We ate at a lovely chain last week and the bill came with a service charge and charity donation! Presented at the table and, yes, these itens were pointed out but the phrasing sounded rehearsed and would be awkward and unbritish to ask to be removed.

I left thinking both how clever they were and I wont be back, as its manipulative. Pity.

I usually do give circa 10 percent if service is good or better but we rarely drink for driving and medication reasons, so have iced table water. The bills are generally lower as a result, and i feel serving the water deserves a payment, so why not as a tip.

yes! Only happened once but it was so awkward!

I entirely agree with this. Ive never understood where this idea has come from that waiting/restaurant staff deserve extra remuneration that other minimum waged roles dont get like retail, cleaners, factory workers, manual labourers, care workers, teaching assistants, all low paid occupations none of whom are 'tipped' for performing their job.

Tipping is only relevant in the US where a lack of consistent minimum wage means waiting staff can be on extremely low wages because the expectation is that tips will make that wage up to a liveable wage.
In the UK thats not the case, we have a minimum wage and actually is risen dramatically in the last 20-25 years.

So no - i wholeheartedly disagree with tipping culture and the sense of obligation around it, in the UK.

I just ask for the bill minus the service charge now (well get my husband to do it ). If they ask if anything was wrong I just smile politely and say no.

I think it's cheeky and I'm fed up of these awful American practices taking over (at least over there, i can see why it started). Servers are paid a fair wage for the job the do in this country, I'm not there to top up their wages.It's costly enough eating out these days without additional cost. Absolute piss take! My husbands sister waitressed for a while and she made a fortune in tips

I abhor the tipping culture.

My friends daughter earns on average £70 a night in tips on top of her minimum wage pay for waiting on tables. That's more than my DC gets as a band 5 nurse in intensive care.

In a lot of East Asia it's actually considered rude to tip as it implies that the waiters are "poor" and actually they are paid well and respected.

Why does the waitress/ waiter deserve a tip more than the lady who scans your shopping in the supermarket, or the librarian who helps you find a book on their shelves, or orders it?

but surely the 'payment' for 'serving the water' comes under the same payment as taking the order, serving the food and clearing the table - literally all part of the job they are paid a wage in exchange for!

My view is that waiting staff are paid a fair wage, if not a high wage, on the basis that it is at least the same wage as many other jobs, some of which (cleaners, nursery assistants) include a lot more responsibility. Tipping is for exceptional service. I very rarely receive exceptional, or even significantly above the bare minimum service in the UK. Sometimes I don't even get that. So I rarely tip.

Yes, of course water is included, so we dont have to tip. But, realistically, with the price of drinks now, by coincidence we save a fortune so it doesnt hurt to add a few bob for service. I wouldnt do it if the service were poor though.

It is awkward and really you don't have a choice. You just pay.