AIBU to wear a floral dress my brother's girlfriend calls white to their wedding?

[princesspicker]

My brother is getting married in three weeks and I’ve bought a fairly expensive dress for his wedding. His gf saw my dress and said she thought it was inappropriate because she claims it’s white. The reality is that it’s not white, it has a red and green floral pattern. I don’t really have time to find a new dress but my brother keeps asking me if I’ve found something new, saying he and his gf are worried other guests will talk about me behind my back if I show up wearing something white (it’s not white!!). I think it’s so rude that they’re trying to police what I wear, especially when they know I had to call off my wedding last year and he’s my brother so I should get to wear something special to his wedding!

Why was your dress at your mother’s house?

To be fair though, it quite literally says ‘Cream’ on the website

I got married many years ago and I honestly couldn’t tell you what a single person was wearing. What is this policing what other people wear all about?

Just wear it. It’s not like you are wearing another wedding dress is it 🙄

🙄 at them, not you!

In fairness though... the OP seems addled for no reason. The SIL has said nothing to her, the brother has asked if she has a dress, nobody except Mummy has seen OPs dress.

This whole debacle is all.made up in the OPs head 😂

Because the dress seems to be causing a problem or have you missed the whole point of the thread??

Of course you would normally just wear whatever you like to a wedding but apparently not in this case 🙄

Exactly. There is no way on earth that that's inappropriate, and it's not likely to be mistaken for a bride's dress.

People on this website have totally lost their marbles over wedding guest outfits.

@princesspicker

Why did you post on here if your story keeps changing? One minute she’s seen the dress now it’s a dress similar to your mums and she’s not seen it?

regardless of her seeing it or not. The dress is too white and she’ll not be happy with it.

But it doesn’t seem like you care do you?

You think you’re owed this because your MUM (not you) chipped in for this wedding…as do most parents lol.

I will not be dictating how my siblings have their weddings because my parents pay for it… madness

You have a choice. Nobody is forcing you to listen to the brides wishes, you do have the option of staying home and not upsetting her on her wedding day.

Like everyone has being saying THE DRESS IS TOO WHITE

FFS it's not Ok to wear cream to a wedding either!

Or bloody ivory, just in case you feel tempted!

That dress is MOSTLY a colour on the spectrum of unacceptable wedding guest whites through creams.

Accept it and move the feck on, for everyone's sake.

This wedding is in no way about you and your unnecessary drama is just selfish.

But there IS something wrong with it and that is that THE BRIDE HAS ASKED YOU NOT TO WEAR IT!

This is rage bait. Get a hobby OP!

It would take no time and minimal effort to get the PINK version of that dress. It has more flowers on it so less plain background too.
It is also a MUCH more attractive dress. HTH.

I’m so surprised how women get to adult hood in the uk and don’t know this very prevalent and long standing tradion and etiquette. Even common sense would surely; tell you.

its clearly not she would be mistaken for the bride, what an utterly odd thought. It’s etiquette says white/cream is a brides signature colour and as such, women don’t wear it to allow the bride to stand out on her special day.

how on earth could you possibly think people are saying don’t wear it because they think she will be mistaken for the bride.

I’m afraid some may say tough titty. If Op has already paid for the dress

well it ain’t celebrating you hon.

Exactly right

Either common sense has completely gone out of the window or the bride is Sonia from Gavin and Stacey and all her pals have turned up on this thread

Sweetheart, I'm in my 60s and believe me, we didn't have this 'rule' back in the 80s and 90s!

The difference between "not being mistaken for the bride" and "allowing the bride to stand out" is a paper thin one.

Wearing all white might be slightly noticeable and look a bit bridal and therefore best avoided. Hardly anyone argues with that. Anyone who think that a dress that's a bit white but also has any pattern on it also takes away from the bride's all-white outfit either has problems with their eyesight or is just ridiculously precious.

WTAF - The bride thinks the dress is unsuitable but because you are selfish, spoilt, bitter and uncaring you don't mind upsetting her on her/them on their special day. As you say you have other siblings. It's a good job your mother loves you.

Op, clearly there is a back story here, have you ever lived independently, I’m guessing you live with your mum and always have?

Sweetheart... it isn't a rule, it's just etiquette.
It has been around a lot longer than you.

So show the bride the dress that you’ll actually be wearing and let her decide if she’s comfortable with you wearing it.

It wasn't etiquette at the 15 or so weddings I attended (including my own) over the last 20 years that anyone should raise an eyebrow at a completely normal white backgrounded floral dress.

Yes it’s etiquette and was definitely around in the 80s and 90s.