AIBU to think my friend should mind her own business?

[MounjaMum]

Last month I spent £540 in going out. That does not include when we go out as a family and my husband pays. I wanted a new handbag as I was running shot and didn't want to dip in savings so hinted to my husband and he gave me the money towards it. My friend said that it was unreasonable of me to do so.
She is saying that I should stop going out so much and should have left it till when I have the money. I am actually upset by the way she said it and told her as much and she is saying that I am acting like a spoilt 'bitch' - her exact words.
Am I being unreasonable in thinking that she should mind her own business!

What do you mean by going out? Drinking? Eating? Both?

She can mind her own business!!

I mean it is you and your husbands money and if you can afford it, what harm are you doing and it is nothing to do with your friend.

Just don’t talk to your friend about money. I wonder if it came across as bragging as I don’t know of anyone who would tell me how much they have spent on going out or discuss asking their husbands for money to buy a bag.

Why are you even telling her that to begin with?

Usually out with the girls. I have different groups of friends (university, school mums, gym ) people I have met over the years who have become good friends. It is mainly like meals out, spa, afternoon teas etc.

Why on earth would you have told her?

I mean if you can afford it I don’t see the issue. How much do you save per month? Do you have DC?

It's none of her business what you do but as PPs say why are you telling her? It could sound like you're bragging and have rubbed her up the wrong way.

If you are going to discuss personal & family finances in so much detail with a non-family member, be prepared for them to disagree with your choices.

@NerrSnerr - it was just one of those conversations you have with a very good friend over coffee- 'I am really broke now, cannot go out until payday'. Then we started talking about clothes to wear to another friend's bday, browsing online and saying what we like then the conversation turned to bags and I told her. To be honest, we are very close. We met at the school gate 12 years ago and we are now family friends, our husbands get on very well and we often go out all together etc.

Why are you talking about how much you are spending. You’re making it her business by telling her.

completely classless and trashy, keep your finances private

She could shut up and listen to you giving out about how little you have month on month while seeing where you could actually save money but at some stage people need to face reality too.

She should definitely mind her own business and I definitely wouldn't have said anything, but its probably better to just not discuss financial information with her

@MounjaMum you are spoiled, in a good way, especially if your husband actually takes your "hints"

Your friend sounds jealous.

Going forward, tell her nothing wrt money.

@Statsquestion1 Yes, that also included going out with my son when DH was away for work. (I did not cook the whole week he was away as he usually does most of the cooking).
That was not savings - just spending money that is left after all bills etc are done.

Exactly this. Why do you feel the need to tell anyone?

Why on earth did you tell her this information? Yabu to brag about it

She is actually in a better position that me. I work and she does not work and still enjoy a very comfortable life. I do not think she is jealous. I think she just thought I should have waited till next month.

Unless you're financially inconveniencing her (e.g. borrowing money from her and not repaying it) it's none of her business whatsoever.
I have a friend like this - always very ready to offer opinion and judgement on the way I spend / manage money. I just don't talk to her about any of it, and grey rock any comment she makes.

To be fair if you were complaining about being skint then proceeded to tell her you spent so much on going out and takeouts all week because you couldn’t be arsed cooking, I can see why she commented. You offered up the information so can’t really complain that she had an opinion.

I think it’s weird to say she should mind her own business, when you told her. You can’t tell someone something and then get all uppity and want them to mind their own business, just because their reaction isn’t what you wanted.

You didnt cook for a whole week? Why not?

I suppose if it was just a back and forward conversation she had an opinion that is all, and you can just ignore her.

Oh definitely not bragging - just conversation. She told me her husband got her a bracelet for her birthday, it was £800 and she hated it. Her words was 'Why would he think I would wear this, it looks awful'. It is just normal for us to talk about these things - we usually go shopping together etc