AIBU to expect payment when my sister's boyfriend used my concert ticket?

[ThatHazelWasp]

Long time lurker first time poster.

Need some outside perspectives on this to see if I’m the one that’s unreasonable. Bought concert tickets last year alongside DSis1 and Dsis2. Realised a few months later I had double booked myself so couldn’t go to the concert.

DS1 wanted to use my ticket to take her daughter, my DN, but wanted to check she was allowed to go due to her age etc. I asked DS1 a few times if she wanted the ticket but she always replied she needed to look into. DSis never actually told me she wasn’t going to take DN, only when i text her 2 days before the concert about something unrelated did she let me know. This didn’t leave me any time to sell the ticket and I was also on holiday the week before the concert.

Dsis2 boyfriend ended up going to the concert using my ticket. I don’t think he was really bothered about going but they saw it as the ticket was going to get wasted so he may as well use it. DSis2 didn’t text me before the concert to let me know or to ask if this was ok. Had she messaged me I would have told her he’s fine to take the ticket but I expect him to pay me for it. I don’t think DS2 boyfriend would have gone if he had to pay for the ticket.

To add I also would have expected DSis1 to pay me for the ticket if she wanted to take DN.

AIBU to expect DSis2/boyfriend to pay me for my ticket?

I personally wouldn’t expect payment. He stepped in last minute to avoid the ticket going to waste. Had he not have done you’d have lost your money anyway.

I would of seen it as a freebie going to waste and took advantage of of that

if he really wanted to go he would of bought a ticket in the first place

Well no I wouldn't expect him to pay because you wouldn't have used the ticket and it would have gone to waste if he had not agreed to go.

No, I wouldn’t have expected him to pay for it. I wouldn’t have expected my niece to either. You double booked yourself, you relied too much on your sister getting back to you regarding having the ticket and so left yourself with no time to sell it. So, either way you weren’t going to get anything for it whether your other sisters boyfriend used it or not!

Are you really saying you’d have been happier for the spare ticket to just have gone to waste as opposed to someone using it?!

I wouldnt expect payment

If you wanted payment you should have made that clear from the start.

It sounds like no one was using the ticket, you didn’t sell it and it was just going to go unused?
There was a vague mention of your sister taking her DC but it clearly never materialised into a real plan.
Whether the BF went or not is immaterial to you since you weren’t using it and nor was anyone else.
This seems quite petty.

You double booked yourself and didn’t attempt to sell the ticket. If it had been your dn would you also have expected payment? Ideally you should have set a deadline for dsis/dn and then tried to sell the ticket. Also you could have found out and told your dsis if it was age appropriate for dn. Chalk it up to experience and let it go.

No I wouldnt expect payment.

Blimey OP first one sister messed you about regarding the ticket, then the second sister's boyfriend hasn't got the manners to offer payment for it even though he used it.
Do your family always treat you in such a dismissive way?

No, you didn’t sell him the ticket. You couldn’t go so it was used by someone else to avoid going to waste.

This has happened to me a few times and no I never sell the ticket, just let someone have it.

YABU, it was your mistake and responsibility to sell the ticket. Your financial risk.

Your sister with the DC should have got back to you, but when she didn’t you had options to sort something else out and didn’t.

Other sister’s boyfriend wasn’t U to use the ticket & not to pay.

No of course not and if you wanted money you should have explained that up front, the ticket was only used so it didn’t go to waste. You should have said ok selling this fo you want to buy it if not I shall sell elsewhere.

you can’t have expectations in your mind then whinge as no one can read your mind,

This 💯

What now? 😂

Not in those circumstances tbh. You double booked yourself and didn’t really make much effort to drive anything about your ticket. In your shoes I would have said ‘sorry, I can’t go, do either of you know anyone who would like to buy the ticket, if not, I will list on twickets to try and get the money back’.

I wouldn't have expected payment for the ticket for someone that stepped in last minute to use but I would have been clearer with my sister ages ago letting her know if she didn't want to buy it you would be reselling, seems like there was confusion on the ticket.

He only went because it would have gone to waste. He shouldn't pay. You should have followed up sooner and given a deadline of let me know if you want the ticket by x date or I'll be selling it.

YABU. You should have made more of an effort to sell it if it was that important to you.

It was going to waste so no payment. Seeing as you wanted payment whatever happened you should have sold it earlier. Then other could have bought if they wanted to go.

It's a bit late for you to start looking for payment. If he thought he had to pay and wouldn't have taken the ticket because of that you would still be out of pocket. You should have just sold it right at the outset.

i do think YABU op.
It was your ticket, if you wanted to sell it you should have been more proactive and pushed for clarification re your DN.
It sounds like he just tagged along to make up the numbers not because he really wanted to go and thought the ticket was free, you can’t charge him if he wasn’t made away prior to the concert

I think if you were bothered about wanting the money, it was your responsibility earlier on to firm up arrangements for the ticket with a simple message “hi guys can you let me know by x if dn is going to the concert otherwise I will get the ticket sold” the boyfriend going because it was going to go to waste imo mean he has to pay.

No I wouldn’t expect payment for it as it was too late to sell it and he wouldn’t have bought it, as he wasn’t bothered about seeing them. Next time give a clear deadline that allows you time to sell the ticket.