Home alone

[KillswitchMinge]

AIBU to leave my 16yo over night?

I'm dating and it's going well. I'd like to occasionally spend the night at his but I've never left DS before. He is sensible and I would be reachable on the phone.

I'm not ready for DS to meet him yet and I feel like it would be extremely awkward to bring him back to stay if DS is home even if nothing happened.

Assuming he’s happy with this and it’s a safe area then I don’t see the issue. Do you have neighbours around in case? I think you should introduce them though, can be quite casual but at least your boyfriend wont be a total mystery.

🤣
I'm sorry you're so shocked. Personally I think it's more shocking to cuddle your children to the point that they are entirely unprepared for adulthood when it arrives but each to their own.

Wow I was going to pitch in with the "yes of course"s.

Also surprised at the first few answers. We left 17yo DS2 for a week when we went away (in UK but four hours away). He could have come but didn't want to.

Honestly if your 16yo is on board with this then it is totally fine, what do people think might happen? For ref with DS2, he had some friends round t watch the footy and drink a beer. It was fine. It's his home too and I trusted him – it was clean and tidy when we got home.

To the PP who said their house would not still e there the next morning – really? Have a bit of trust in your DC and tbh give them more credit.

It makes her feel icky. That's literally it.

How on earth is this shocking?? I'm shocked you're shocked 😂

Unless you are a very new mum cuddling a 6 month old and can't fathom the day ever coming when you can leave your precious baby? I do get that, but as they get older then normal and right thing is to build independence and separation. I don't know how old your kid is, but hopefully if you're doing it right you'll be able to leave them for a night at 16!

If you are in Scotland he can get married so I’m sure he will be fine for a night

At 16 I loved to be left at home for own night with lots of snacks (lots of snacks is always the key). I think several nights would be different and being far away would be different but occasionally parents stayed away for one night on Saturday and it was fine.
However it depends on a child (teen but still …)
For a start I would consider booking something e.g a concert and ask teen if it would be ok if I stayed the night to simplify travel. You don’t need to go into many details as he will have your mobile phone number. And then you will see how it goes.
By the way is your son able to see you on life 360 or similar? It might affect your planning. My daughter would question and might worry seeing me at unknown address.

The discussion about leaving a 16y so you can sleep with your partner is also odd. Thos I suspect it's mostly one poster?

Why is that not OK when (say) leaving to stay with platonic friend would be OK? Is it bc parents should not be having a sex life? wtaf? Catch yourself on (as I have seen others say on here) @Tink3rbell30

It's the potential shagging that's bothering her. No matter that actually I was going for a nice meal or a drink in a pub and some nice adult company, and a night enjoying sleeping next to my partner just as much as the shagging which didn't even always happen, mothers must not have sex!! Apparently

Of course he will be fine at 16
He can ring you or others.
Christ people are helicopter parents over a 16yr old

That's a different debate, haven't seen anyone say they do that. It is shocking but each to their own 🤢

Oh i am sure a shag and a relationship is vital occassionally as a grown woman.

Of course it isn't.

I was living alone at 16.

Some of these comments are bizarre, fgs talk about coddling kids.

I see the mummy martyr contingency has arrived on the thread, wondered how long it would take. 🙄

And we wonder why kids aren't coping with real life 🙄 I'm positive a 16 year old isn't going to feel abandoned...

Keep your phone on loud, make sure there's food in or he's got money to order a takeaway. See if he wants a friend to sleep over. Then go and enjoy yourself!

I was babysitting other kids at 16, I also worked late shifts, getting the nightbus home

Unbelievable comments here and why we have a generation of inept teens.

He'll be absolutely fine, maybe send a message when you get to where you're going to make sure you have service. So long as he's happy about being left to for it. I'm surprised there's people saying no don't leave him. Unbelievable. He's nearly an adult.

I admire you for your steadfast commitment to your opinion in the face of universal disagreement

DH and i left our 15 year old home alone for three nights while we went away for a weekend. She practically shoved us out the door and slammed it on our arses. The babifying of nearly adult teenagers by some here is ridiculous.

100% everyone has different opinions

Well not really. The vast majority on here think the OP is fine to leave a 16yo for one night if he is happy with it. A few do not. And I have only seen a couple of people agreeing with you that parents should not be having sex.

Exactly, everyone is entitled to agree or disagree.

Uh-huh, my point was that everyone doesn’t have a different opinion. Luckily most people take the (imho reasonable) view that a) a 16yo is ok at home alone overnight and b) consenting adults are allowed to have sex, even if they are parents.

And has the years gone on parents wonder why there kids are lazy, dont know how to talk for themselves, or be independent let alone how entitled they are.
And thick as shit.

Yet in other countries kids as young as 10 get the bus / train to school stay home alone as parents are working like dogs.
Teens do the same plus work.

The uk as become a nanny state.