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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would I be unreasonable to complain to school

203 replies

geekygardener · 17/06/2026 19:20

Hello,

Today one of my dc took part in a sports event at school. The event was an all day thing. Dc is in secondary school.

Unfortunately, in the morning, my dc suffered an accident when another child hit her with the equipment. Complete accident and I don’t blame the other person, who did apologise. I also fully understand that accidents do happen, especially when lots of children are doing sport. I am not one to worry unnecessarily and I am not one to complain easily.

When I went to pick dc up from school (an hour and a half after normal time as the event went on past school hours) I immediately noticed she looked completely different. She was getting in the car and it was sunny, so I couldn’t see her closely at first, but it was strange because of how different she looked in her face.
When she was fully in the car I could see that she had two black eyes and pretty bad swelling on her nose and between her eyes. There was/is bruising across her nose and a small cut. It is quite obvious that her nose is broken.

Dc explained what happened. She did tell me she had a headache and felt dizzy all afternoon. Teachers witnessed the incident, which included DDs head being knocked back quite violently, and told her that as they were in the middle of the activity they would see how she was afterwards. Despite this no one did check on dc and no one sought or applied first aid. There was time between activities where other staff were present and no one said or did anything.

Later, dc told a member of staff that she had a headache and felt dizzy and was told “it’s just a bump“ and to carry on with the next sporting activity.
One teacher eventually did offer an ice pack but this was hours later and dd declined (this teacher wasn’t part of the event and saw dd in between the activities and seemed quite shocked upon seeing her face) . Dd is extremely shy and said she felt uncomfortable and bad for the other child so declined the ice pack. I told her I think she should have concentrated on her own well-being rather than worry about others but really staff should have assessed her because lots of people decline treatment after an accident due to shock or adrenaline. Dd said she didn’t want to make a fuss and tried to play it down, which I believe because this is how she is.

No one checked her for concussion or showed any care during or after the incident. No one contacted me to give me the heads up, or even allow me to make a decision to seek medical advice. Dc was left to carry on the day (hours as this happened first thing) despite feeling rubbish. No one did anything as the day went on despite the swelling and bruising becoming more severe.

If I was in charge of a group of children (which I often am) and saw a child with this level of swelling and bruising I would most certainly be concerned, be providing first aid and notifying parents.

Dd does not want me to contact the school. She is embarrassed and says she doesn’t want to cause a fuss as she is fine now.

I am not in the habit of overreacting and making small injuries into something they are not but every time I look at dd I feel sad, sorry for her and furious that no one helped her. Luckily nothing more serious happened but I feel it’s negligent to not consider the possibility when a child suffers a head injury.

Despite dd asking me not to approach the school, I feel that I should. I feel like they need to look at their first aid procedures and maybe reflect on this to prevent a much worse outcome next time.

It doesn’t help that a friend of mine lost her little boy recently due to a head injury from him falling over. It’s made me quite conscious of the dangers and I feel quite angry and sick that this could have been a lot worse and no one checked. Her face is quite a mess so it’s bad enough as it is.

AIBU to contact school. If people think I should what would you say?

OP posts:
GoldenPineapple15 · 17/06/2026 19:25

I am a secondary school teacher. You definitely should contact the school . This is not only unacceptable, but could have had an even worse outcome than it did ( which is already terrible .) I can not believe that you were not contacted or first aid given . You don’t mess around with a head injury .

Pippa12 · 17/06/2026 19:27

Is her nose broken?

Oricolt · 17/06/2026 19:28

Teacher here. That's appalling. Yes, contact the school and ask for clarification abut what happened and how it was managed. Head injuries are no joke.

BeRoseSloth · 17/06/2026 19:29

I think an injury like that and a headache/dizziness needs checking this evening.

ApparentlyIsMyCircusAndMyMonkeys · 17/06/2026 19:30

You absolutely must raise this with the school, and depending on their response, the governing body. This is a serious breach of duty of care and any sporting event should have its own risk assessment which outlines how injuries will be dealt with. I would ask to see a copy of this as well as the general school accident/ health and safety policy.

Has your daughter now has medical treatment? You may need any discharge paperwork’s for a complaint if you choose to make one. I hope she is recovering, must have been so painful.

Sunshineclouds11 · 17/06/2026 19:30

Yeah I’d complain.

geekygardener · 17/06/2026 19:30

I wanted to add that they also let dd out to walk home alone after the event.

OP posts:
JoshLymanSwagger · 17/06/2026 19:31

@geekygardener Please tell me you've taken her to A&E?
If not, please do it NOW.

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 17/06/2026 19:31

I hope she's had medical care? If not, take her NOW.

All of it, let alone allowing her to walk home is incredibly negligent.

Yes, you absolutely SHOULD complain to the school. They should have a proper head injury protocol.

Middlemarch123 · 17/06/2026 19:32

Firstly, A&E or walk in, to check for concussion, you can’t be too careful with head injuries.
Secondly, cause a stink at the school, they should have responded differently, it’s inexcusable. And I’m an ex safeguarding lead. Write to the chair of governors.

Hope your DC is ok,

geekygardener · 17/06/2026 19:32

I am going to get her checked. I have asked my mum, who is a nurse, to take a look before we go as well because she is very levelheaded and will tell me if I’m overreacting

OP posts:
JustAMiddleAgedDirtBagBaby · 17/06/2026 19:33

Yes I'd be in A&E with her. If her nose is 'obviously' broken does that mean it looks out of alignment? She needs checking over properly for that and the head injury.

Zippidydoodah · 17/06/2026 19:33

Yes, take her to A&E. While you are waiting, write a complaint.

This is disgraceful. They have completely failed in their duty of care to your daughter.

i hope she is ok.

Jan24680 · 17/06/2026 19:34

It doesn't sound like they have any first aid procedures

Pippa12 · 17/06/2026 19:35

Tbh, if my daughters nose ‘was quite obviously broken’ I would have driven her straight to A&E. I wouldn’t be asking my mum to check on her and I absolutely wouldn’t be posting an essay on here before I got her medical care.

For these reasons I’m leaning to you likely exaggerating/over reacting.

Your care has been no different to what the school has offered- absolutely nothing and it’s 19:30 at night.

Whyherewego · 17/06/2026 19:35

Head injuries are serious and they should have known this. I'd definitely complain

Sunshinemoonlightboogie · 17/06/2026 19:36

Teacher here and yes you should absolutely complain. They have a duty of care and this is appalling!

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 17/06/2026 19:36

Pippa12 · 17/06/2026 19:35

Tbh, if my daughters nose ‘was quite obviously broken’ I would have driven her straight to A&E. I wouldn’t be asking my mum to check on her and I absolutely wouldn’t be posting an essay on here before I got her medical care.

For these reasons I’m leaning to you likely exaggerating/over reacting.

Your care has been no different to what the school has offered- absolutely nothing and it’s 19:30 at night.

This. All of this.

OP, why is it 7.30pm and your child who has an obvious serious facial injury is still without medical attention? Jesus fucking christ.

Zanatdy · 17/06/2026 19:36

I’d 100% be contacting the school. Your DD may not want this, but not her call.

Zanatdy · 17/06/2026 19:38

OP is probably waiting for traffic to die down or sorting other kids. It’s not an emergency, but clearly telling a child to continue with sports day straight after and not bothering to assess her condition is bad.

Silverbirchleaf · 17/06/2026 19:38

Hope your daughter is okay, and definitely complain!

geekygardener · 17/06/2026 19:38

@JustAMiddleAgedDirtBagBabyher nose is very swollen at the top. She looks like one of the aliens from avatar if that makes sense, it’s the best way to describe it. There is no shape to it, it’s just fat. The natural curve in between/just below her eyes is flat and swollen. Plus she has two black eyes and that whole area is bruised

OP posts:
JSMill · 17/06/2026 19:39

I’m a teaching assistant. This is unacceptable and you need to talk to the school.

JoshLymanSwagger · 17/06/2026 19:40

geekygardener · 17/06/2026 19:32

I am going to get her checked. I have asked my mum, who is a nurse, to take a look before we go as well because she is very levelheaded and will tell me if I’m overreacting

Please just take her to A&E.
The injury was hours ago.
A retired nurse can't do xrays.
💐

MyEasterBonnet · 17/06/2026 19:41

Are you not doing the same thing that the school did, by not taking her for medical attention?

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