AIBU to object after he assumed he and his daughter would move in?

[Trombolice]

Name changed for this.

Been seeing someone for around a year and a half. This morning he casually dropped it into conversation that his daughter might have to move schools when they move. I asked where he was moving to and he said “I mean when we move in together?”

I said “who said anything about moving in together??” So he said “well not now obviously but at some point we will surely?” So I said “and where are you assuming we’ll live?”

Long story short he had it in his head that he and his daughter would be moving in to my house. His rationale is that I have “so much more space” and much more space than I need and it’s selfish to not want to share it.

I said I have no intention of having anyone live with me! He’s now gone off on a major strop saying I have too many unused bedrooms and it’s “unfair” etc

I think he has got his daughter believing they will be moving in to my house too. They live in a two bedroom house.

AIBU??

YANBU

What a cheek to think he's entitled to your property without even a discussion.

Does he own or rent? Do you have kids?
Have you never had conversation about potentially moving in at some point?
I don't blame you for saying no way never by the way!

Yanbu.
He had it all planned out, didnt he?
Was he dating you or your house?

When I was single this used to happen to me all the time every bloody boyfriend wanted to move in. I knew I'd met the right man when I wanted him to move in and he had options that we discussed before he did.

I mean I don’t think it’s odd that he may have thought you would move in together at some point

but his reasoning is all wonky and it’s odd he’s just made an assumption when you’ve clearly never discussed it before

how old is his daughter? Surely you don’t know her that well if you’ve only been dating a year

What a weirdo. You’ve told him firmly so it should be settled.

I think that's due a breakup right away! Entitled so-and-so!

You don’t have to move anyone into your house if you don’t want to so YANBU.

However, I don’t really blame him for thinking that it might be a natural progression of your relationship if you’ve never told him it’s not what you want. Provided, of course, he was paying his fair share and the legalities were ironed out to protect your interests….

Run for the hills!

🚨Cocklodger alert 🚨

So he already has a bedroom, one for him and one for his DD, at his house? Why does he need more space than that? And if he needed more, what would he do to rectify that if you weren't together?

Cocklodger alert.

You'll be a nanny with a fanny next.

Well it seems he’s been in the relationship for the long game. Firmly trying to get his feet under the table and he’s just tested the waters to see if he can worm himself in. I wouldn’t want someone else’s child living in my house either. Yes, they come as a package, but it’s for you to suggest the moving in, not him to try and plan.

Excellent! 😂

Dump any man who tantrums or any man who expects you to provide housing for him and his offspring.
What an embarrassment of a man.

If he feels his kid needs extra rooms, why has he failed to provide them for her?

What a charmer! Presumably now you’ve seen through his CF assumptions and plans and will be splitting up with him?

Assuming your relationship is heading towards living together is one thing, not too bad.

This though... He’s now gone off on a major strop saying I have too many unused bedrooms and it’s “unfair” etc

Fuck off cocklodger.

Well at least you now know that your house makes up part of the attraction towards you!!

What you now need to establish is if he actually likes you as a person or swear you as a nice house for him and his daughter.

That is exactly what I was going to say. Run, fast.

😁Lol, no marriage proposal? Just an expectation that he'd be moving in with you.

Honesty men crack me up. Every single move they make and every single thing they do is for something that benefits them. They don't do ANYTHING that doesn't benefit them.

Women should be more like men.

This would have been a relationship ending conversation for me op. I’m surprised it wasn’t for you. He is very very clearly only using you for your house.

Too many unused bedrooms 😂Is he the bedroom tax? Do all of us with spare bedrooms need to keep an eye out for lurking cocklodgers?

Honestly Op, I would re think this relationship .The fact that he went off in a strop is a red flag.
He is a user

The classic single dad who rents and/or lives in a small place, and latches onto a single woman with property. Just think, then he’ll have money he can spend on daughter and op, have a bigger place to live, and food and washing etc all sorted, plus childcare for his child. Win: win - for him!

Well done in having your eyes opened and finding out sooner than later his plans. Let him strop. Not your problem.

I agree.