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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not let sister's dog use my garden as a toilet?

74 replies

YesterdaysQueen · Today 06:29

My sister recently moved to the same town as me but into a flat without a garden. She has a dog who only likes to do his business in a garden, not out on a walk. Since moving she has been letting herself into my garden with her dog so he can do his business in my garden as he won't do it anywhere else according to her. She does pick up after him but it all goes in my wheelie bin which stinks!

I had no problem with her dog using my garden when she would occasionally visit before but now it's become every day, 2 sometimes 3 times a day.

I've asked her to stop as I have young children who, now that the summer is finally here, want to play in the back garden and it just annoys me that all of the lawn area has had dog poo on it and as he gets a dodgy stomach fairly often, some of it is diarrhoea so my sister has been ripping up the grass in those areas when trying to pick it up.

Anyway, she's now very unhappy with me for saying her dog can't use my garden as his toilet any more and has said it's not a big deal and I'm overreacting and being difficult.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Sally2791 · Today 06:31

She’s batshit. Her dog, her responsibility.

jackstini · Today 06:35

How on earth can her dog differentiate a garden from a park?!

YANBU - dog shit stinks and it’s not something anyone who doesn’t own the dog should have to deal with

She’s a CF

3flyingducksarrive · Today 06:37

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

DoorOpening · Today 06:38

Oh my god no way would I let this happen! Even one time would piss me off! Just tell her to stop immediately and find another solution.

Zanatdy · Today 06:39

Yeah that’s not on at all as your children are playing there. Her dog will have to learn to do his business on a walk.

PartyQuestion30th · Today 06:40

Tell her she needs to find a long term solution and this isn’t it.

PinkHairbrushClub · Today 06:41

That’s just weird. She should take her dog to the park and pick up after it properly.

YesterdaysQueen · Today 06:42

jackstini · Today 06:35

How on earth can her dog differentiate a garden from a park?!

YANBU - dog shit stinks and it’s not something anyone who doesn’t own the dog should have to deal with

She’s a CF

I am very fond of the dog, he is lovely but he has a lot of training issues! He's very noise reactive so often gets scared when on walks if he hears an aeroplane or a loud motorbike etc and just wants to go home. He also has no recall and pulls on the lead. So really I think its more a case of it's just easier to let him go in the garden than to train him to go on a walk or to go to a park off the lead but train recall.

Honestly though she is so angry at me and very adamant that IABU and that no one else would have a problem with it. I actually started to doubt myself!

OP posts:
PersephoneParlormaid · Today 06:44

If he needs to go he will go anywhere, he needs to be taken places where he can smell other dogs.

NectarClub · Today 06:45

I wouldn’t have allowed it even once. Yuk.

bigsoftcocks · Today 06:46

why on earth haven’t you told her to take the poo away with her for odd occasions previously. It’s hard no and she needs to work out a solution. Get a big padlock for your garden.
this is bad enough, but then you mentioned you have small children. It’s totally unacceptable.

It hazard I guess that the dog is badly trained as well and barks a lot? poor recall ?

this is so ridiculous. I’m actually wondering if it could possibly be real.?

Beachbeachbaby · Today 06:46

That’s absolutely horrible even before I read you have children. No way

MushMashMunch · Today 06:47

Don’t doubt yourself she is being utterly unreasonable. You have young children and should be able to send them to play without worrying about n traces of dog mess (which there will be even if she picks up). Your garden wilL be ruined with her pulling at the grass plus urine and poo. And then the stench! Gross.

Put a lock on your gate so she can only access your garden if she rings your door and asks then refuse permission to everytime. Why on Earth woukd she move to a flat whrn she knows her dog only goes in gardens (which itself is odd!). She should have looked for a flat with garden access. Her plan all along was clearly to use your garden. Don’t let her.

jeaux90 · Today 06:51

Dog owner here. She is being very unreasonable. She also needs to train her dog to do its business on a walk and not double down on its training issues by using your garden as it’s personal toilet!

Left · Today 06:52

Your sister needs to work with an animal behaviourist or trainer to resolve the dogs long terms issues, and do what is best for for the dog. She also needs to consider if she is providing a suitable home for her pet.

olympicsrock · Today 06:54

Wow - I don’t even want my family member’s dogs doing a wee on my lawn! YANBU . I wouldn’t let the dog in your garden again ever

Pineapplewhip · Today 06:55

I can't imagine how anyone would deem that ok!? People really are fucking weird.

Show your sister this thread if she continues her tantrum and get a padlock for your gate!

agggtm · Today 06:56

If they are visiting and he needed to go fair enough but no I wouldn’t want someone bringing their dog to wee and poo in my garden ! It’s like you are getting some of the worst aspects of having a dog without any of the nice stuff

Gateappreciation · Today 06:58

Dog owner here also. Shes being so unreasonable. Your garden is for your kids, not her dog, especially one with stomach problems.

You need to start acting firm and refuse entry every time. Put a lock on the gate so she can’t get in.

She also needs to change the dogs food to a better quality one. It will stop the diarrhoea and also won’t stink. My dog ‘s poo rarely stinks.

YesterdaysQueen · Today 07:00

He does have training issues but actually doesn't bark at all oddly. He is very quiet. But he's a big dog so big poos. I didn't shut it down straight away as I like the dog, he's very sweet and I wanted to help but I didn't anticipate it becoming a 2 or 3 time a day thing forever onwards.

Do people really make other's take their dog poo with them rather than putting it in the wheelie bin? I couldn't go that far.

But I have firmly said no more. I'm sure he can adapt to going while on a walk if he has no other choice.

OP posts:
Jc2001 · Today 07:00

YesterdaysQueen · Today 06:29

My sister recently moved to the same town as me but into a flat without a garden. She has a dog who only likes to do his business in a garden, not out on a walk. Since moving she has been letting herself into my garden with her dog so he can do his business in my garden as he won't do it anywhere else according to her. She does pick up after him but it all goes in my wheelie bin which stinks!

I had no problem with her dog using my garden when she would occasionally visit before but now it's become every day, 2 sometimes 3 times a day.

I've asked her to stop as I have young children who, now that the summer is finally here, want to play in the back garden and it just annoys me that all of the lawn area has had dog poo on it and as he gets a dodgy stomach fairly often, some of it is diarrhoea so my sister has been ripping up the grass in those areas when trying to pick it up.

Anyway, she's now very unhappy with me for saying her dog can't use my garden as his toilet any more and has said it's not a big deal and I'm overreacting and being difficult.

AIBU?

It will shit anywhere if it's desperate enough. Tell her not to use your garden any more or lock the gate.

Unnecessaryletter · Today 07:01

Surely it's madness, and rather cruel, to have a dog when you live in a flat with no garden.

HoraceCope · Today 07:04

if she stops he will just have to learn to poo elsewhere

LuckyHazelFox · Today 07:07

YesterdaysQueen · Today 06:42

I am very fond of the dog, he is lovely but he has a lot of training issues! He's very noise reactive so often gets scared when on walks if he hears an aeroplane or a loud motorbike etc and just wants to go home. He also has no recall and pulls on the lead. So really I think its more a case of it's just easier to let him go in the garden than to train him to go on a walk or to go to a park off the lead but train recall.

Honestly though she is so angry at me and very adamant that IABU and that no one else would have a problem with it. I actually started to doubt myself!

So she's just another lazy dog owner then. It really irks me when irresponsible people take on dogs who need plenty of walks and training. Having a dog without a garden is just ridiculous.

Inmyuggs · Today 07:09

I am sure once the dog is only walked around elsewhere it will have to go!
Ignore her...never hears of anything so mental.
Yuck for the children in the yard.
She should be taking the poo bag with her to a public or her own home.
Enjoy the peace