She watches my IG story daily AIBU to msg her

[neveraskingtime]

A friend of my late DP views my story everyday without fail. I haven't spoken to her since before the funeral after everyone in DP's orbit was strictly instructed not to associate with me. Those who did speak to me at the funeral were unfriended by the family.

I spoke to her a days before his death to arrange for her to visit him as I thought she might be able to help get DPs life back. His closest friends were actively addicted, so I wanted her (and his old group of mates) to replace them and help him recover.

It's been nearly 3 years now and she doesn't follow me but does check my story daily and has done daily for about 2 years.

I suppose it's possible that she's passing on information to the his circles but I honestly can't imagine they would be interested in what I'm doing after so much time.

I have not been able to retain a single link with anyone from DPs life because I think the general consensus is that I (indirectly) caused or contributed to his death, and that view was expressed but thankfully shut down immediately by the coroner at the inquest with no further inquiry or exploration along that line.
So....do I reach out?

the opinion can't go any lower

Maybe not but you still have no gain here. You are just using up headspace and keeping yourself trapped in a mentally unhealthy mindset. You have been through a really traumatic event and you will only be reliving that. For your own sake, you are better off just blocking whoever you can and moving on in a way that works for your own peace of mind.

Like they say, the best revenge is living well. You can make that happen for yourself.

Ok that confirms it, you are definitely attention seeking and look for drama.

Good luck.

Interesting how this started with she is viewing my Instagram stories should I reach out to they are calling your work accusing you being a prostitute this and that all from a 6 month relationship with a drug addict during which period you went through two miscarriages, tried to get him clean but couldn't, he died from overdose and you were accused of being the cause of his death and cast out. All this from a 6 month relationship??? Especially when you claim you have zero drug tolerance???

Sorry for your loss but you need to move on, and also make better choices next time. If you find out a man you are seeing has been hiding a drug addiction you RUN. You don't try to have children with him, that's irresponsible and unfair on the children.

u know everything

I would say it doesn’t mean anything, they come up on my feed automatically so sometimes I’ll watch them.

Lovely, I am not sure this thread is doing you much good.

I understand you carry a lot of anger towards your DP's parents, and probably want revenge - who wouldn't? It's a human emotion.

But at the end of the day, we are all born alone and die alone, and the person you owe the most love and care to, is yourself. You are the only one who is always with you, whatever happens. You are the only one who will never not be in your corner.

So do future you a favour, please think carefully now about what will be best for you at this point. Yes, you are angry beyond belief - who wouldn't be - and you want revenge.

But will getting further enmeshed with these disgusting excuses for human beings, actually help future you to heal and be happy in the future?

It's trite but true - sometimes the very best revenge is your own peace and happiness.

Wishing you well, from the bottom of my heart. X

I'm, not angry. I am just sick of this and I am gonna post every horrible message I have received blaming me for his death .

Why though? Why not just leave them in peace rather than seeking further upset and attention?

OR

They could leave her in peace? I can't imagine how awful it is being accused of causing the death of another person when I am totally innocent. It is abuse from them to the OP. I am not sure how I would go about it myself but she can't let people ruin her character in this way.

OP have you tried talking to a solicitor about cease and desist letters? Sorry if you said already and I missed it.

Maybe I’ve managed to miss it… what are they doing to her? Other than one person viewing a public story (and then several when she deliberately posted inflammatory stuff last night). I honestly can’t see where she’s said they are communicating with her

Cease and desist what? Gossiping about her on a group chat that she isn't a part of or desist from the person viewing her Instagram stories?

She can easily block the person from viewing her stories but chooses not to. Heck she started this thread asking if she should reach out to the lady.

This, how can they be “ceased and desisted” from viewing a public item??

But, you’re not angry.

walk away with dignity OP. Don’t stoop to this ridiculously low level

I haven't contacted them in any way, they are the ones with a group chat about me 3 years after his death for crying out loud. I am releasing the witness statements from the inquest because fuck if I'm gonna be called a murderer and abuser for that 3 years after the fact. They can shove the cold hard facts up their group chat.

The MNer here who told me they have a group chat was right. Swarms of people I have never heard of are begging me to remove the photos of the nasty messages one of them sent me and accusing me of humiliating her. All I did was post her own words with zero added commentary or context.

Trying to appeal to my humanity and empathy. Where was the compassion and respect for my privacy and my dignity that you now boldly ask of me when you and your friends were calling my workplace, blaming me for his death, showing up at my house, circulating vicious conspiracies, mocking me for crying at the funeral and calling me from 10 numbers?

What happened to ‘I really don’t mind people gossiping about me’?

I don't, like I said. But I am going to confront them with the truth. So now at least their gossip will be forcibly accurate.

How on earth do you know that they have a current group chat, still centred on you?

Someone on mums net told me she knows who I am from the details and she knows they have a group chat about me. Also confirmed by all these people ive never heard of swarming to my instagram.

"SpiceGirlsNeedAComeBack · Yesterday 22:44

Oh christ I know who you are. No don’t speak to them block immediately they speak about you on a group chat."

This is the post she is referring to that she's gone all attack mode. Some random person on mumsnet told her there's a group chat about her and now she's going to show them by posting everything.

@neveraskingtime I have absolutely no idea what you think that will accomplish or why you think they will stop gossiping about you if they have been gossiping for 3 years. How much juicy gossip is there about you that the group chat is going strong for 3 years?

Having said that you're an adult so you can do what you want, there's no point going back and forth with strangers on mumsnet. I hope you find closure and can move on from these toxic set of people and heal from the trauma of losing your partner, dealing with all the pain that comes with loving a drug addict and then being wrongly accused of his death. That's a lot of trauma and I do how you are able to find help and peace.

All I have done is leak actual documents of black and white facts from the inquest that establish that I did NOT murder my own boyfriend.

i watch everyones stories on instagram its usually because i just scroll through and tap from one to next. 99.9% of stories dont interest me unless its my best friend or my daughter etc its just a boredom habit

This escalated rather quickly 😳.