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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to feel sad about ageing and becoming invisible?

203 replies

Madformaltesers · 03/05/2026 00:11

Been out tonight for a family meal..I'm mum (single parent) out with three sons and spouses all in their thirties, i am in my fifties.
I am old, it’s evident, when I am out, i like a dance but I'm old and they were not playing any 80s music!
I've come home, realising I wont ever turn heads again, I've been there, done that and Im now invisible.
I will never be youthful again.
God I feel sad, I am successful, my children, grandchildren are amazing and my legacy but the absolute sadness that my life is marching on has really upset me.

OP posts:
DancingNotDrowning · 03/05/2026 20:45

@user44455557621

I don't disagree completely, but I think it's worth really thinking about what the desire did for you psychologically

I don’t think it damaged me, but it certainly - with hindsight - set me up to have high expectations about the way I am treated and accommodated.

On the whole it’s a positive experience. I set my self ambitious goals and achieved them. I agree with the PP who said youth is powerful. It really is

Angelil · 03/05/2026 20:49

YABU. Ageing is a privilege.
I have known 5 people who left us WAY too soon. They were aged 16, 19, 21, 23 and 30 respectively.
I’m celebrating every birthday I get, because they didn’t get to.
Visibility is, in my view, nice to have, but being comfortable in your own company is more important.

puddingwisdom · 04/05/2026 07:16

PhaedraTwo · 03/05/2026 12:42

You still have to work to get into Oxford and do well in your field.

I know people who put minimal work in. IQ is something you are born with. Its not "earned"

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