AIBU to feel low about ageing changes and ask how others cope

[Glitterballofdreams]

I’m 41, and my (large) breasts are noticeably sagging, and it’s getting me down. I have invested in a sleep bra to make things more comfortable at night.
Also noticing more and more fine lines and wrinkles on my face.

I know these aren’t serious concerns, and are 1st world problems in the grand scale of things. But I wondered if anyone else struggles with ageing and if so how they manage it? Any recommendations are highly appreciated! Would love breast surgery but can’t justify it really.

Trying to look younger is just unsuccessfully chasing an ever moving goalpost.
Much better to embrace ageing and concentrate on being healthy and strong.

If you are looking to spend out on face/eye creams and lotions then save up instead and have a little Botox and filler - it’s the only thing that really makes a difference. Then use a good spf30 daily.
I just had COG threads (I’m early 50’s) for my saggy jaw line and it’s made a noticeable difference. A few little tweaks has made me feel so much better

OP I have no advice, but just to say I understand. I’m 36, and have started feeling this way recently. I’m technically still in good shape - I’ve remained active throughout life including lifting weights several times a week. But in the last year or so my face has started to sag/ body look less smooth. I used to get asked out a lot, but do feel the process of becoming ‘Invisible’ has begun (being single this probably stings a bit more). As other posters have said, there is something to be said for having confidence and if investing more in self care will help you obtain that it’s probably worth doing xx

Exactly … ageing is a privilege denied to many!

Ditto

Ageing is unavoidable, and beyond taking good care of your skin and body in order to minimise avoidable damage (from the sun, for example) and premature ageing, battling against it will ultimately be futile. The best approach IMO is to be curious about why society values youthful looks in women, ask myself whose standards I’m trying to conform to, and make a choice about whether I’m willing to play along with the notion that visibly ageing is one of the worst things a woman can do.

I wear clothes that I (not others) think look good on my body and that I like. I take care of my hair and my skin so that they’re healthy, and I work out so that I can avoid becoming physically elderly in an avoidable way (we can’t mitigate all ill-health and ageing, but we can definitely influence some of the avoidable things) so that I can continue to live fully for as long as possible. That means far more to me than whether I have laughter lines, grey hair, and saggy boobs

Just remember that you’ll (hopefully) one day be 60/70/80 and look back at photos of 41 year old you and wish you could look like that again, saggy boobs and all. Look back at a photo of you in your 20s and remember how you probably wished you were thinner or taller or whatever. Wouldn’t you go back to the you you were then and promise to not complain about those perceived flaws now. Well do your later self a favour and enjoy who you are now because you’ll wish you could be it again at some point.

I just try to ignore and get on with enjoying life. I'm 61. Jowls, wrinkles, flabby belly etc. But generally am able to focus on how I feel more than how I look. Every now and then I see myself in the mirror and get a fright, get a little down, but usually am able to push through. I'm lucky to be fit and healthy, not all my friends and family of my generation are still here.

My mum always says 'today is the youngest you will ever be!'

There's so much truth in that.

I look back at photos of me in my early 40's and I look like a baby! One day you will too.

I also get a 'fright' every now and again, usually in a photo where I think I looked much better than it turns out I did. At least I usually feel happy at the time in real-life, photos are pretty irrelevant.

Photos are terrible. I often have a great time on holiday or at a do it whatever, then see a photo of myself. So depressing. But until I see the photo I'm grand!

I'm 50,51 this month and I don't know if it was turning 50 or the fact that my DGS6 holds my face and calls me lovely but I feel like I like myself now more than I've ever done before.

It's mad because I always looked younger than I was and had a really good figure when I was younger but had no confidence,now I need to lose weight and I'm going to but I'm so much happier now in my own skin than I've ever been before.

After loosing my younger sibling to cancer when they were 41 I've started thinking of aging as a privilege. There's no reason that it was them and not me who died so I try to find meaning in my life and happiness within myself. I hardly ever look in a mirror these days.

I cherish every day with my children, I try to be a supportive friend, I work in a rewarding and community minded job, which i am good at. I'm a good neighbour. I enjoy nature and all the different seasons. I say no to things I don't want to do and yes to things I do and have no guilt whatsoever.

Life is too short to fret about grey hair and wrinkles.

You’re definitely not alone so many people feel this way as their bodies change with age. It’s completely valid to feel a bit low about things like sagging or developing more lines and wrinkles, even if they’re not “serious” issues.
What helps a lot is focusing on what makes you feel good day-to-day well-fitted bras, good skincare, staying active, and even small self-care routines can boost confidence. Some people explore non-surgical options like firming creams or treatments, while others shift their mindset toward acceptance and body appreciation over time.
There’s no one right way to cope, it’s about finding what makes you feel comfortable and confident in your own skin again.

Yes, I’ve noticed all the changes - saggy boobs, wrinkles, turkey neck - but I don’t give a damn about them. It’s the stiffness, the arthritic joints, loss of hearing etc that gets me because no matter how I may look, my brain still thinks my body’s 16 (I’m 57) 😆

I am so sorry for the loss of your Mum x

I dunno, I'm pretty happy with how I look, more comfortable in my skin at 46 than I was at 40.
I don't cheer with every new wrinkle, but it doesn't bother me either.

I’m not remotely bothered about how I look; but I am bothered about feeling I wish I’d done more with my twenties, my career and educational outcomes. I have very young children now and by the time I come up for air again I fear I’ll be in my fifties and have missed a lot of boats…

I’m 33 so a bit young to be complaining about this but I have definitely had an ageing ‘leap’ in the last 12 months. My face just looks a bit saggier, my under eye bags are worse, my 11s are deeper and my hair texture is somehow a bit different. My lips also seem a little thinner than they were when I was in my 20s.

But then I’ve barely slept since having my oldest 7 years ago and I have an insane amount going on in my life, so what do I expect.