How many people have you slept with?

[Fearlesssloth]

…and do you lie about it? I’m late 30s, 4 or 5 relationships, most 1-2 years, been married now for 6 years. I’ve slept with around 50 people (I know cos I made a list once!) Only 1 or 2 were ‘true’ one night stands. I know that’s a lot but I refuse to be ashamed of it, I had a lot of fun in my youth. When I was dating before my husband I never admitted it to anyone I was dating. I’d always say less than 10. So how many people have you slept with and do you freely admit it or do you reduce the number a lot if asked by people you’re dating or were dating before if you’re in a relationship? And how do you feel about the number?

The kind of men I'm interested in don't care

Oh now you're being ridiculous

Fair enough

@coulditbeme2323 "Cuck"? 😂😂😂😂😂😂

I genuinely didn't think people actually used that word. I just thought people used it in a kink context where people get off in watching others screw their partner.

That probably says a lot about me. 🤣

Anyway. Those who are clutching their pearls, and I include your good self. I'd be fascinated to know what your husbands are really like. What goes on in their heads and just how many people they've slept with.

I should add that when I was having a whale of a time doing this, I wasn’t giving the slightest thought of what the fuck my future husband might think because I’m not a loser that depends on the approval of a man.

6 because I have been mostly in relationships. Never really liked one night stands!

Innit. In 20 years together, I'm pretty sure my husband has never asked me nor me him how many people we've slept with.

Says more about the man "not being okay with it" than it does the other person. If they've got a problem with it, then they're the problem.

One. Married to him. One for him too. Only me.

That's lovely

There's a lot of internalised misogyny in this comment

Honestly no idea on the actual number. If I had to guess I’d say 25-30. Some were relationships, some flings, a fair few one nights stands in my 20s. I’ve been married almost 10 years so no one’s asked in a long time but absolutely no shame from me at not knowing 100%!

Four. I'm mid-30s, and have been married for ten years.

What??
I said it's a high number. And I said I wouldn't lie. So why are you asking me those two questions? I've already answered them.

Not as many as I'd like..

Around 25-30.

When I was young my mother taught me that you should only have sex with someone you’re in a “proper relationship” with, so I spent my teenage years not sleeping with people who I wanted to sleep with due to a weird sense of “respecting myself”. In hindsight that was so stupid. I don’t have any regrets about anyone I’ve slept with, but there are definitely people I regret not sleeping with when I had the chance.

Ffs who cares?! 😂😂 as long as the number wasn’t rising after they got married then it’s fk all to do with him?!

I must admit that confused me too that 75 is apparently not a high number?

I don't know the actual number - had a lot of fun at uni... I'd say def more than 20. I seem to recall DH and I discussing it once, as his number was similar (he worked in a nightclub bar during his youth and I think had a lot of fun too). Been married for 20 years now so I'm fairly certain he didn't care any more than I did!

What on earth is a cuck?

I don't know exactly how many I've slept with. Maybe 5 a year before I met my husband?
Not sure if he knows the number or not, I can't remember if we discussed it or at least I can't remember what his number was 😂

The number is irrelevant, and if anyone you're dating asks you for a number, then it's a red flag that they're controlling, abusive and judgemental

im nearly 62 well in the treble figures

It's perfectly fine to have an expectation from your partner around their 'number' if you're willing to extend those standards and expectations to yourself. The issue with a lot of men is they expect something from women they won't expect from themselves. Women like me who have slept with a lot of people won't be interested in men who want a woman with a number below 5 or whatever, those men can find women who value that kind of thing. Likewise I'm happy with a man with a high number because it doesn't bother me. The issue I and others have with that poster is that she is insinuating that our husbands/partners are lying about being ok with our numbers or are somehow defective men ('cucks').

Or they are concerned for their own health.

Do you actually know what cuck means?

it has nothing to do with the amount of sexual partners a person has had.

put it this way, if a man judged me because I’ve slept with a few men, I wouldn’t be marrying him.

so good luck finding a woman who’ll find your judgment attractive.