Matcha, leggings with socks over, botox, yada yada yada

[Wheredidallthegoodonesgo]

So bored of it.

This is nearly every mum in my area, pilates & matcha, botox and handyman & cleaner recommendations. No depth, no real worries..basic.

Aibu to want to meet funny, down to earth mums with depth and interesting pasts and conversations?

Yes but OPs point is they’re all into it. Because they’ve been told they should like it by social media. I’m waiting for tea to come back into fashion.

Food fashions change just as much as appearance. In the 70s Leibfraumilch and Cinzano were seen as sophisticated . Takeaway drinks were instant coffee or tea in polystyrene cups from greasy spoons or a vending machine. Skimmed milk was a niche product and dairy free alternatives didn't exist.

New products become available. Some people try them and like them, some try them and dislike them (I tasted a relative's matcha and it's not for me).

Some people are very set in their ways and won't try new things. My late MIL was very suspicious of cheese and pasta and referred to fusilli as 'the wormy things your kids eat'. If it wasn't meat and potatoes with cabbage, carrots or peas she wasn't interested. She later amazed us when she went into a care home in her 90s and developed a passion for pizza.

Whether you prefer to stick to what you know or like trying new things you won't stop food fads coming and going and I'm quite sure these maligned women in leggings and socks wouldn't be paying £5 a pop for matcha if they weren't enjoying it.

I don’t actually. I started Pilates at the age of 46 and it’s been amazing for my condition. At the studio I go to I have met woman all ages and from all walks of life, some “new money” some “old money”. Me and my friend go to a cafe afterwards sometimes, I get a matcha because I love the taste and she gets a coffee, we both have socks and leggings on as that’s what you need to wear. She has a cleaner. There might be really young girls following social media trends but I don’t think that’s the age group she is talking about. As I said there are people at Pilates and in cafes drinking matchas from all walks of life. Making assumptions about people is not a good look

How does she know that though? That’s an assumption again, it’s a relatively new drink to the uk and lots of people actually like it as it tastes nice

And I’m not deeply offended, I find it comical and stupid that people actually make assumptions like this from people enjoying exercise or a drink

Ok. Enjoy your sticks and Pilates class 🤣

It's just trends op, you mustn't get so uptight about it.

I like latte and even wear crocs on dog walks what does that make me I dread to ask .

People have always followed fashion and trends it is not a new thing. Unclench and try to be more tolerant!

Unless they are close friends they're not going to be having deep conversations with you. If they are close friends perhaps you could mention you are bored with these subjects? Live and let live I say.

I don't move in these fancy circles luckily. Haven't got any problems with doing pilates, that's good for you. But I only have to think about doing those plank thingies and I have to reach for some ibuprofen. If that makes me a pick me person, who cares?

White sock wankers - ha yes!

Trainer socks, come to the dark side 😂

I don't know about anyone else, but school gate chat is superficial. I'm not going to go into depth about things unless we're good friends.

Also, I wouldn't hire a handyman without a recommendation. Similarly a cleaner or aesthetician.

Being healthy (pilates) is essential when you're a parent. I was reading an article recently that said that our healthy life expectancies are going down and, in some areas, the healthy life expectancy for a woman is only 53 years. If you don't take care of yourself in a way that you enjoy, then you're going to spend a large portion of your life unwell and on medication. That doesn't make you vapid.

Matcha is disgusting to me though. No thanks. And, as a millennial, I refuse to wear anything other than trainer socks.

I wear leggings and socks, hate matcha but love an iced latte which I'm sure falls under the same umbrella. I'm pretty funny I'd say, I've definitely got an interesting past and have plenty of topics of conversation from politics, to travel to sport if any of those would pass the test. Not sure what my comfy clothes and choice of drink would have to do with my ability to hold a conversation?

Why? Surely you drink it whether it’s fashionable or not? I hate tea so it could be the most fashionable thing in the world and I still wouldn’t touch it.

What should I wear to communicate that I have an "interesting past"? Is it ok to do yoga? Can I drink matcha even if I have "real worries"?

Gosh, so much to consider. I'm wearing jeans today, and yet could still recommend a handyman.

Some people like to ‘fit in’ some people like to ‘stand out’
I think this says a lot more about you than them.
I would question to myself why is it that I feel this so deeply. People’s judgements are often deep insecurities about themselves. Do you struggle to fit in? Do you like yourself? Do you worry people will find you boring?

Precisely! I'm the only person in the entire office that doesn't drink tea, I don't feel social pressure to down it, even when it's free at work... I'd feel even less inclined to do so if the social pressure meant I had to buy and drink it in my own time

Obviously I drink tea. Unlike the matcha drinkers. Just one day my on trend era will come.

I do reformer but don’t wear the white socks. (trainer socks til I die) My good friend does it with me and is definitely a white sock wanker. I tease her about this.
She thinks it makes her look young. I have told her it makes her look like mutton dressed as lamb, because it highlights that’s she’s trying to dress like all the 20 something Ananola ponytails in our class….

im sure I’ll get told I’m judgey but this thread has made me realise that she is just more interested in conforming generally than I am. I would prob try to go the other way - ie: ‘fit in but only to a point’ This is NOT because I think I’m better - just that ive always tried to not look the same. We had different upbringings and possibly very different childhood messaging about conforming. I guess people are different 🤷🏻‍♀️

I do think OP that the pendulum has swung towards more people wanting to look alike than they used to want to. But I was a teen in the 90s when the trend was to try to look a little more individual if possible, it’s prob stuck with me.

So OP, what sort of drinks, clothes and hobbies do you deem to be acceptable and non-offensive to you?

I don't think wearing trainer socks is really coining the market of individuality

It's a lot to expect everyone to look different, there are all sorts of reasons why people dress the way they do. I tend to wear a variation of the same thing all the time, a uniform of sorts, because I can't be bothered to put together a unique outfit. I don't judge those who do though, in fact I slightly envy their energy and motivation. Oh no, what if people think I am a sheep for wearing the same thing most of the time which may or may not be similar to what a lot of other people are wearing?

Im a mum to an 6 and 2 yo and have never experienced other mums like this nor have I ever seen any like this.

One of the funniest, most intelligent, down to earth, well-travelled, well-read interesting mum I know just happens to wear socks over leggings and do pilates! Not sure about matcha though, I think she's a coffee drinker.
Anyway, try looking past the exterior and you just might be pleasantly surprised.

I hate small talk but I know you usually need to go through a bit of it before you really get to know a person. Are you sharing your deep and interesting thoughts with them? Or is there a chance you come across in the same way you perceive them to be?