AIBU to want distance from my controlling baby's father?

[lifesbeenfeelingheavylately]

This is already embarrassing for me, so I'd be grateful if you didn't pass judgment.

Five months back, I gave birth to my first child, but his father and I aren't a couple. We were never really a couple, it began as just some casual fun while my ex was in prison and he was having issues with his wife.

I've liked him forever, so the true feelings have always been there, and he's the guy I've wanted to be with all this time.

We'd been hooking up regularly and behaving like a couple, but we both knew it was wrong and had to end.

But then I fell pregnant, I let him know straight off, expecting a panic and a push for abortion, but that never happened. He said it was totally up to me what I decided.

I was planning to have an abortion, but things changed because my ex wasn’t getting out of prison any time soon, and we’d been trying to have a baby for over two years without any luck.

Throughout my pregnancy, my baby's dad was amazing, he made sure we had everything and was right there at the birth too.

I let him pick the baby's name, even though I really don't like it, but I figured I'd let him have his way. The baby also carries his last name.

He made me get our baby circumcised, not for any religious reason, but just because his mum decided that for him when he was a baby. The procedure went well, but I still feel guilty about it every day.

Only a month in, he started getting really controlling and still is.

He doesn’t want baby on social media.

He’s always trying to control what I wear. I video called him, to show the baby, and his first reaction was about my outfit, he told me to change it up because now that I'm a mother, I should dress differently.

He keeps moaning and wants to control every little thing, and I seriously can't put up with it anymore.

I just wanna take my baby and move away; he's already got his wife and three kids.

😂😂😂

Have you read all her comments?

Coercive control is included in domestic abuse.
And he is very much on that path

I'd rather be sanctimonious than raise a child in this shit show 😂

Thank you so much, babes.

I understand that I'm not a bad person. Yes, I was wrong to sleep with a married man and have his child, but what's done is done now.

I know that I am a good mother, I love my son, and his dad loves him too. However, some women here are trying to convince me otherwise, suggesting that he doesn't care and only wants to control me.

Hope you have a great weekend x

However, some women here are trying to convince me otherwise, suggesting that he doesn't care and only wants to control me.

Because they can all see what you are refusing to see.

suggesting that he doesn't care and only wants to control me.

You literally used the word controlling in your thread title. It's right there. And have then gone on to give several examples of behaviour illustrating this fact.

it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, has feathers and swims
on water but OP is still convinced it’s a giraffe.

Oh, grow up.

You are behaving like an immature teenager.

What sort of ignorant and nonsensical response is this?!

You are absolutely delusional OP. Enjoy your shitshow of a life, hopefully there is a some semblance of intelligent presence or role model somewhere in your orbit for your son, who is the only innocent victim in this soap opera. His parents certainly aren’t up to the task.

The giraffe or the duck?

Not that it really matters. You really are just wasting your time here (and ours), aren’t you? Your self esteem is so fucked you’ll keep acting like this forever and sod the consequences for your son, who you clearly couldn’t give a toss about. You ignore the advice of the people you have asked for help.

So crack on. Just don’t come crying when it all goes wrong because you think all of this is going to somehow work out fine.