AIBU not to understand parents dreading school holidays with their children?

[Fancycrab]

A lot of my mum friends are constantly saying things like “counting down the days till their back in school”, and before the holidays, “I’m dreading this two weeks”, “what am I going to do with them?!”, “why are the holidays so bloody long” etc etc. Firstly, I just want to say this has nothing to do with work or money, I understand that school holidays can be difficult for working parents (myself included) but many of the parents I’ve heard saying this are SAHMs with plenty of money. Some of them have even said stuff in front of their kids or to them, like “god what am I gonna do with you for two weeks”. I feel sorry for their kids, it’s like they don’t like spending time with them or even like them. Makes me think why’d you bother having kids if you don’t like spending time with them?? School holidays are difficult for me cos I have to shuffle my working hours about and pay for a few holiday clubs, but I love spending time with them. I’m a single parent too and I don’t have a lot of money and yeah it’s a lot sometimes, but I love going on walks with them, taking them to the park or making something at home. I genuinely enjoy their company and realise these years while their young and actually enjoy spending time with me are going to be gone in a nano second and I’ll never get them back, so I make sure I appreciate these years and make the most of them. AIBU to not understand the mindset of dreading having your kids at home for the holidays (barring financial or work reasons)?

I always thought I'd home school until age 5. My relationship with my DC chose otherwise. We love each other to bits but too much time together and we just start annoying each other. School holidays were hellish because actually you don't have endless money or energy to be going on trips all the time. And you never knew whether it was going to be a day for doing nothing or a day full of energy. We'd just end up grumpy and irritable and hopeful for the new term to start!

They definitely shouldn’t be saying it infront of the kids but honestly, everyone’s situations are different. I have always loved the school hols with my son however I’ve just had a baby who is 2 months old and I definitely struggled this Easter break. Some people are genuinely just struggling.

2 kids both ND, no family support and a DH who works very long hours

It never ceases to amaze me how many people on here struggle to grasp that their experience is not the only experience.

Non verbal, learning disabled, severely autistic child here with no play skills who spirals when out of routine - I would love to enjoy the holidays.

I don't really look forward to the Nov/Feb half terms if I'm honest. I'm usually saving/recovering financially from Christmas, the weather is cold/rainy etc and there's often very little to do. I do enjoy my children but a week with a tiny budget and not being able to get outdoors is a drag. I very much enjoy May half term, Easter hols and of course the summer holidays (though i do believe 6 weeks is too long, it should be reduced to 4 and have the extra 2 elsewhere in the academic year).

I used to love school holidays - but at that time I was a term time worker so I was off work myself.

I think it must be a lot harder for people having to juggle annual leave, and even those who are SAHPs probably have a term time routine which then gets broken.

Do your DC not spend time with their school friends during the holidays? Or any cheap activity days/summer clubs in your area?

I love the holidays, even though it’s just me (DH dragged along sometimes) making sure they are entertained throughout, no ‘village’ to help, simply because we don’t have to rush out of the house at the crack of dawn for school each morning. We can relax a little and enjoy each other’s company. There is always pressure there though to make sure they are given a good, fun ‘break!’, combination of activities in doors and fun-days out.

I’ve never dreaded the holidays as I’ve always planned for them months in advance. As soon as one school holiday is over and kids are back to school, I’m planning / booking days out for the next - this helps me spread the cost and also means I’m not dreading being off with them.

I think parents underestimate how difficult it is with children (no matter how much they wanted them) to properly relax. Annual leave is always booked around the children and is almost never used to rest and recover. Add in a high stress job and burnout is a very real threat.

also there are a lot of parents who say as sarcasm, they will have good things and bad things to say about school holiday time but added expense, no space to even collect thoughts, having to entertain kids are real issues. Don’t forget that AL doesn’t even cover all the school holidays and parents stress about children being sick at other times in the year etc.

the cost of living is a stress in itself let alone school holidays where kids eat constantly. Even a cinema trip is like £30 for 4 where I am, a zoo trip £50 for entry alone…..those without kids would be shocked if they realised.

I don’t have kids but find this phenomenon very odd. In my last job the two directors (one male, one female) had two children a piece, and they would literally engineer work trips so that we would need an overnight stay in a hotel to “get a break from the kids”. For example we would have a meeting with a client a 3-hour train ride away and they would purposely schedule the meeting for 9am so that the team would have to travel up the night before. Those of us who liked our lives resented missing an evening with our DP just so they could have dinner in peace and sleep in a hotel room. It was a nightmare, to be honest.

I was always enthusiastic at the beginning of the holidays, and then would usually get to the last week or so of the long summer holidays and be looking forward to them going back to school and getting back into a routine. I did enjoy the school holidays overall