AIBU to expect my husband to buy lubricant for sex?

[Orangeducks]

For years me and my husband have used lubricant in sex because otherwise I bleed/ it chafes and isn't that comfortable. The bottle ran out about a month ago and I asked him to buy more (I know I could buy it but im a teacher and terrified a student/parent will spot me buying it). Its always been him that buys it. He just keeps forgetting and the last couple of times we've had sex without it but I bleed and its become like a joke that he hasn't bought it. We were about to have sex earlier and I got annoyed that he hadn't bought any yet. I explained that I play my part in our sex life by going to the pharmacy every 3 months and getting my blood pressure checked etc to get the pill and put artificial hormones in my body every day (he refuses to get the snip though were definitely done with kids) as well as all the other stuff that women accept comes with sex (I get thrush fairly frequently) and that I felt it wasn't much to ask that he picked up a bottle of lube. I am almost always with the children (they attend my school) as well so any time I'm shopping, they're with me. He works away 3 days a week so has a lot more time alone and I am very rarely out of the house with out my kids and don't fancy going to the lube aisle with them! He's just stormed out and said I could buy it and now is sulking.
AIBU to make it his responsibility to buy it?

It’s not about the lube then really is it.

It’s about you taking on all the responsibilities.

But if you want to die on the lube hill, so be it.

I know right.. Students or parents would see her buying lube with her kids and know she's not a blushing virgin!!

I think it's more the principle, he has one job! I would be annoyed too.

He doesn't care about your enjoyment, I can't imagine my husband wanting to have sex that resulted in me hurting or bleeding. This attitude wouldn't put me in the mood for sex . Lots of sex shops online you could get it but the fact he'll carry on without it knowing its not comfortable for you says a lot

You need your own Amazon account. Or change the password to kick his mother off your current account.

Also, you should see your GP about bleeding from having sex. I don’t think that is normal. Thrush is horrendous too, and you shouldn’t be getting it so often, mention this as well.

Not the point of your thread but have you gone to the Dr over the vaginal bleeding? It’s not normal neither is recurrent thrush. You don’t say your age but are you perimenopausal?
You might need vaginal oestrogen x

Order some online. Even Amazon sells it. It will be delivered in a plain brown cardboard box.

Just order it online like a normal adult if you are too afraid of seeing a student in the wild. This isn’t a big deal, if you don’t want to bleed during sex buy lube or don’t have sex, it’s stupid letting yourself suffer physically because ‘well I take the pill, he should do his share’.

Tbf PP have a more valid, serious, point.
Please do see about why you are bleeding?

Do you WANT to have sex with him?

Is he lazy and selfish in bed as well as in general?

Sounds like the buying of the lube is the tip of the iceberg. A pointed thing to show how much you do versus how little he does.

Wife work, mental load, etc etc.

Is his hygiene good?? Why are you getting thrush from sex?!

You could order off eBay, boots, Lovehoney etc if you were just worried about your kids or pupils or mil knowing.

Edited to add: I'm sad you've had sex twice despite you both knowing you will be dry and will bleed. Why? That doesn't sound like a great situation which is why I'm wondering about the wider relationship.

Its been really interesting to read the replies. I am seeing that I am being too much of a prude which is probably really fair. It doesn't feel like a comfortable thing for me to do but I can see that I'm probably in the minority there and most people dont see buying it as an issue.

I think for me its not necessarily the act of buying it but about us both taking some responsibility for our sex life? I feel that all of that lies with me and asking him to pick it up is quite a small thing? So in my head its not necessarily about the actual practicalities but about what it represents in our relationship?
Its got me thinking about it on a wider level about what's expected of women etc and made me feel quite annoyed!

They sell plenty on Amazon, Boots and the Anne Summers website. Order some online if you’re embarrassed.

Then he doesn’t have sex? But my partner felt embarrassed to buy so I just got it from Tesco, shoved it in the trolley under some shopping lol. Though be quick at self check out with the next item as the picture of it comes up loud and proud on the screen 😂

Buy it in the internet like everyone else?!

THIS is the point. I'm surprised how many posters - presumably mostly women - are ignoring the fact the OP'S dh doesn't give a shit about it being unpleasant for her.

Just set up your own Amazon account, takes 30 seconds. Or use Boots online or a supermarket delivery service or any one of a thousand other options.

But I also agree your husband is being completely rubbish not to have bought it, given that you asked, and to carry on having sex with you that makes you bleed. I'd be absolutely horrified if I caused someone an injury like that. Do you actually want to have sex in those circs?

This.

Ha, the only way I was going to say it wouldn't be reasonable, was of he was a teacher! I know that shame of aisle 🤣 pregnancy tests were a challenge!

Agree with Amazon! (ETA- ignore, but don't share with his mum anymore!)

It's lube, not a gimp mask with matching butt plug.
Just pop it in your shopping basket or order it from Amazon. You're making this into a humiliation ritual without it needing to be!

Her kids might! Mine would have laughed for months when they were teenagers

Agree with others see a doctor about the bleeding and thrush though it shouldn’t be a regular thing.

He should just buy it but also it’s easy enough to order online from boots or similar if you don’t want to order from Amazon.

Tbh I’d be more pissed off that he isn’t willing to get the snip after you’ve completed your family!

If they are teenagers leave them home to do the shopping.

We Used condoms for a while, it was always me that made sure we had them. I asked DH once what would happen if we ran out, would he go and get some, he said he’d go without until I went. I get lube from Tesco, scan it quick and put in bag.

Order it click and collect from Boots or somewhere, personally I wouldn't be having sex if it hurt and made me bleed, and your husband shouldn't want to either, does he sulk when he doesn't get sex?