Ditzy women

[Wellwhatnowbellaboo]

... Drive me bloody bonkers. Just that really . I'm probably going to be flamed but seriously - I notice them more and more and maybe its my mindset ( driving, parking, meandering taking ages to decide in front of a supermarket fridge, forgetting appointments we've made, at work not knowing whst meetings are about etc.)

Anyone share my frustration!

How do they differ from ditzy men? Can't remember appointments, or what you told them yesterday, dither over which tool to buy...

Agree 100% and perhaps I should have called it ditzy people bit its mostly/ always women so I wanted to be truthful

It’s a very privileged woman who can be ditzy…I’ve never met one

Isn't this old style A Tate talk?

It sounds like you think "demographic" is something to do with geography.

@FallacySunken oh yes, I agree so much re the films! It's was definitely a late 90s / 00s thing. Ditzy middle class women who were intellectually bright. I also think many successful actors or famous personalities do this a bit, the 'what am I like' types. It really annoys me, as do real women like this. And yes they do exist, I don't know why ppl are so defensive here. OP isn't generalising about women she is talking about a specific type.

Personally i can just about tolerate the ditzy ones but what i really don't like is women that are vacuous and there are some out there. They talk about nails and hair or skin treatments and they watch reality TV and they have no clue as to anything going on in the world that doesn't affect them. They buy products because someone they follow on whatever app tells them to, they will queue at a random place because it's trending and not even know why. They are just consumers and never question themselves. They also don't give a shit about the environment and buy tat. I find them embarrassing to be around and they give women a really bad reputation.

That's quite a repertoire 😄

I hope you've managed to escape the curse!

I have little patience for ditherers, but they definitely aren't only women!

bit its mostly/ always women

No, it isn't. You're just discounting men's equivalent behaviour.

Exactly.

It's just sexism. It's like bossy. Only girls are bossy, boys are assertive.

Same with ditzy, women are ditzy, men are absent minded. No-one minds when a male academic is absent-minded, surely his brain is working on some deep problem. But when a female rocket scientist is the same, she's considered ditzy and maybe she's putting it on for some reason.

What about ditzy men? Are they exempt?

Thank you! Sums it up ! I agree re the other type too..... that will also get a barrage of sexism responses 😂

@Wellwhatnowbellaboo
You are being unreasonable because it seems that what is bothering you the most is that fact that their “irritating behaviour” could be a reflection of you, as a women. You don’t want them to “let the side down”. You don’t get to choose how other people are and what they are comfortable doing.

That’s not how things work. Some women have these characteristics as do some men.

Because it is sexist.

I know plenty of vacuous men, who only talk about trainers and their new Xbox and football on TV and have no clue what's going on in the world. They buy products because some footballer has advertised it, they will queue at a random place because it's trending and not even know why. They are just consumers and never question themselves. They also don't give a shit about the environment and buy tat. I find them embarrassing to be around and they give women a really bad reputation.

People of both sexes, with exactly the same behaviour, and you're singling out one sex as worse for some reason.

Why?

Well obviously - but that isn't what we are talking about here...

@Wellwhatnowbellaboo
You are not alone in finding certain behaviours irritating, but why do you think it reflects badly on you?
Presumably you don’t hold highly the opinion of this type of person or someone who admires this type of person.

I'm not trying to single out a sex specifically, it's more that I notice it more with women - those men are no different I agree and that would irritate me too but I don't even know or pay attention to them that's all⁸

Personally, I find arrogant, know-it-all men the worst. They usually have overinflated egos and very low IQs.

Let's just think about why the women you are so scathing about are being as you say ditsy or indecisive?

I am a highly competent woman with a demanding full time job and two teenagers. I have a dh who works hard and chips in but his job is even more demanding and ridiculous. When I've done all the meal planning for every week for most weeks for the last 16 years and when I've finished work after a long day and realised I forgot to buy dinner and am shattered as well I may at the supermarket on the way home and as well as being physically exhausted it's also the mendta load. So chosing a parking space or deciding what to buy feels overwhelming and I just stop processing and start dithering.

When I was pregnant the hormones made me so tired I could sleep standing up, after giving birth I could've cried because the shop didn't have an ingredient I needed or I couldn't find it.

Sometimes in the past I was so sleep deprived by my small children that I just cannot think quick enough. When I have my period I literally become extra clumsy and find my depth perception altered and I need to be way more cautious driving.

Other times I am ditsy because I'm simultaneously trying to remember what clubs the kids have that week, whether we need washing powder and whether my elderly relative is ok and how I feel guilty they are alone and when can I fit in going to visit them.

Basically women are hijacked by hormones continue to carry the mental load for everything. Men who do all the mental load are rare in my experience and even if they do, their hormones remain even and no one really gives a shit what they look like and their fashions rarely change, they don't need make up, tights, nail polish etc so again reduced mental load for them. Also, people respect them more and don't take the piss by not giving way or stealing their parking spaces or generally referring to them as hysterical or ditsy or other negative language reserved especially for women so they get less stressed.

Let me guess, this tends to be women who are younger and probably more attractive than you? It’s such an odd thing to be pressed by.

You are correct- I do not have a high opinion of ditzy behaviour . I'm not saying it's right- I have to tolerate it of course but boy does it grate on me. We all have things that grate on us about other people. If some truly "act this way " on purpose I'd love to know why ! Am I missing a trick 😂

Are you one of those who has more male friends because “women are catty and dramatic”?

I can be absolutely amazing at parking, and I've been utterly shocking. The latter is usually because I've barely slept due to child waking up and then said child is screaming at me whilst I'm trying to park and all I can think about is how everyone thinks women are shit at parking and how shit I'm being at parking then it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Since having kids, women doing things shittily (especially parking) makes me think how much they actually have on their plate.

Men can be just as bad! It might be true that in the past women felt they had to appear ditzy (like the supersmart ditzy blonde in Superman 3) but in my lifetime, I've not really seen any more dizzy behaviour from women than from men.

Let me guess...those men who are inept at everything except what is important to them are just 'men being men' in your view? Men do exactly this but because they are men unreformed sexists ignore it or call it something different.