To think every woman should have at least £20,000 in savings she can access independently?

[AmusedPlumMember]

I’m going to be quite direct here.

I personally think every woman should aim to have at least £20,000 in savings that she can access independently, whether that’s in an ISA or another account. For me, it’s about having a level of financial security and not being completely reliant on anyone else, even in a committed relationship. I know that won’t be achievable for everyone at all times but as a principle it feels important.

AIBU to think that’s just sensible or am I being unrealistic?

I am financially independent I earn well, I could run our home on my own, I also have a good amount of personal savings separate to our joint savings, not quite your 20k but almost. I still think YABU. I recognise my privilege, I grew up with the electricity cutting out because no one had 50p for the meter. Those women aren't going to have 20k to hand, often not even £20, every penny goes to staying afloat or on the children. You must recognise that.

It’s not about the amount, but I believe every adult should aim to be financially independent and not dependent on another adult.

Savings - yes.

such an arbitrary number - no.

Why stop at £20k, why not £100k? Or a million?

I suppose every woman tries to have some savings but how much you can put together depends solely on personal circumstances.

I have feck all savings and I am not a low earner however I do have my own home/car/job and everything else as a single/sole parent so self reliant anyway I guess. Would be nice to have a good chunk of savings.

I don’t see it as either/or to be honest. I think you can contribute to your family and still have some level of financial independence at the same time, even if it’s just a small amount.
For me it’s more about having a bit of security, not choosing yourself over your family.

I barely earned £21,000 last year. How am I meant to save £20k out of that as a single person?

You are being wildly unrealistic. There must be millions on a low income who could never hope to save a fraction of that, and still hope to meaningfully participate in society.

Aside from this not being achievable for a significant amount of people, 39% of UK adults have less than £1k in savings.

But all women? A woman in a non-abusive, loving, stable, decades long marriage where the couple have completely joint finances should have a £20k put aside which the husband isn't allowed to question or access?

"Sorry DH, I know we'd like to give our DC a house deposit, but we can't because that money is set aside for me incase I need to leave you"

"Sorry DH, I know we'd like to travel to see DC in Australia, but we can't because that money is set aside for me incase I need to leave you"

DH might need his own £20k exit fund!

Sure we've recently had this thread. De ja vu.

£20k was just an example of a level that would feel like a meaningful buffer to me, not a hard rule. I agree it depends entirely on personal circumstances and for some people even a much smaller amount would still serve the same purpose.

Unrealistic.

So if you had an additional £1,000 as a bonus from work, you would add it to your personal account rather than spend it on your DC’s?

On that kind of income it’s not realistic at all. My point was more about the principle of having your own financial buffer where possible, rather than expecting everyone to reach a specific amount.

She should also have a unicorn in which to ride off into the sunset ….

I think everyone, man or woman, should save if they can. But £20k is unrealistic unless you’ve had a well-paid career or inherited money. Most of the people I know are just managing to pay the bills.

Absolutely ridiculous to put a figure on it. Yes, everybody should aim to have savings but £20k in joint savings is way, way out of reach for many households, let alone a figure to hold independently. Equally in a household where both are high earners it may be sensible for each to hold independently excess of £20k. Rather than put an arbitrary figure it would be better to look at a percentage of annual outgoings or income, for example to hold savings equivalent to 1/3/6 months annual income. Although even that would be unobtainable for many. I’m a single woman and my savings are way under £20k, equivalent to about 2 months take home pay. I’d love to be able to save more but it’s just not realistic.

I don’t see it as something that has to be hidden or taken away from shared decisions like that. It’s more about having some level of personal financial security alongside joint finances, rather than prioritising one over the other. And I do get the point that what that looks like will vary a lot depending on people’s circumstances and relationships.

Then why did you suggest a specific amount?

Unfortunately I think £20k is so unachievable for the majority that the message would be counter-productive, as it would suggest to women that you won't succeed in leaving a bad relationship without that amount behind you. I agree with the PP who said we should be encouraging girls to get qualified and experienced (and keep their hand in once they do get established) in the first instance (and obviously just hugely strengthening the networks and systems that mean women do have the opportunity to leave if they need to - addressing the factors around custody etc that mean they end up trapped). Emergency savings starting at £500 would be more realistic

A stealth boast?

It would depend on the situation to be honest.
I wouldn’t automatically put it all in one place or the other, it’s about balancing things. Sometimes that might go towards family, sometimes towards savings. I don’t really see it as a strict either/or.

That’s fair, I probably shouldn’t have framed it as a fixed amount. I meant it more as a personal benchmark of what would feel like a meaningful buffer to me, rather than something I think everyone should be able to reach.

Presumably ‘every woman’ doesn’t include women who are on universal credit, as that would take them over their savings limit.

It also wouldn’t include women on low incomes who barely make ends meet each month. Assuming someone could even save £50 a month, it would take them 33 years to save this amount.

It sounds as though you don’t know how the real world works.

I expect you are going to get a lot of responses like mine as you established in your title that every woman should have at least £20,000, which for many people may be the household income.

I have felt safe having £5k in the bank and unsafe with over £20k, it all depends on your income, unavoidable expenses, risks and current circumstances. You may feel you can do a lot with £20k, some people can do more with far less or see £20k as not enough to pay the rent for 6 months.

Not necessarily £20,000 but financial independence.

But not just women. Men too. Everyone needs some financial independence.

My DS is in a gay relationship. I’ve encourage him to make sure he has a secure job and financial independence.