To think every woman should have at least £20,000 in savings she can access independently?

[AmusedPlumMember]

I’m going to be quite direct here.

I personally think every woman should aim to have at least £20,000 in savings that she can access independently, whether that’s in an ISA or another account. For me, it’s about having a level of financial security and not being completely reliant on anyone else, even in a committed relationship. I know that won’t be achievable for everyone at all times but as a principle it feels important.

AIBU to think that’s just sensible or am I being unrealistic?

Oh another thing for most of us to fail at. How put if touch can you be

just something I’ve always been told and wondered how others see it. @AmusedPlumMember

Always told by whom?

Do you have your own opinion on this?

I think it's important for women to develop critical thinking, emotional intelligence and not care about the opinions of others.

What in the ragebait is this?

Yanbu. I think everyone, women and men should have a decent amount of savings that they can access independently. But it's not always possible for everyone to save that much.

As I understand it it, doesn't matter a monkey's coconut if a married women has 20 grand or 20p in savings.
In the event of a divorce he gets half anyway as it is classed as a "matrimonial asset".
( I'm just hoping a Family Law Solicitor will be along soon to tell me I am mistaken) 🤔

I'm on disability benefits. I have anything more than 6k my benefits get deducted and at 16k they stop. I do have two savings plans -one will mature next year - but I can't have over 20k in the bank and I can't afford to save that at this point anyway

I think you're right that the money would be counted as marital assets if the couple were to divorce.

But, if like my friend, you end up having to secretly plot an escape from an abusive relationship prior to any talk of a divorce, then a separate savings account can be invaluable.

I guess someone who is getting 8k as a nice bonus, is already financially not too bad. I got a £50 gift card one christmas from one of my jobs...

Ah-ha !
That is true, but I also think it's illegal ?

😂😂😂😂😂😂

That's about my annual income

My lovely grandma once said to me every woman should have access to her own savings. Something many years after her death and stuck with me.

You should be so lucky.

All I get is crappy cheap wine and manky chocolates (I don't eat sweets !)

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all OP, although the amount would be high for many.

My mum had been a single mum, so it was always drummed into me that a woman should be able to support herself and she should have some 'quiet' savings.

When I started working, I started by putting $10 per week into an account I never mentioned. It was a 'just in case' fund. Over time, after pay rises, I'd very slowly increased the amount to $25 per week, then once the kids were older, $50 per week.

Eventually this 'quiet fund' hit 50K (AUD not pounds). By this time, we had passed our 34th anniversary and it was looking like I wasn't suddenly going to need an exit plan. I used the money to buy a small investment property. This year we will have our 39th anniversary and at some point in the next five years I'll sell and use the money to boost our retirement.

To those saying 20K is unrealistic, it really can seem that way at the start, it does all depend on the timeframe. But even $10 a week for a couple of years could help with a bond and the first month's rent if you ever needed to start afresh in an emergency. I'd hope that most relationships wouldn't show cracks too quickly, but over a few years, that $10-20 a week could come in very handy. Hopefully it won't be something you ever need desperately, but it helps to have it.

That would be lovely, but totally an unrealistic number for huge numbers of people in the uk. Lots of people (I am one of them!) have no savings to there name.
In the event some rich long lost aunt or something of mine, died and I got 20k, I would be very uncomfortable saving that for myself and a what if situation, when I could put it towards things we need now.

Your comment is hugely unrealistic.

What, to secretly rent and furnish a property without telling your spouse so that said spouse can't beat the shit out of you any more?

It may well be, but I would take the risk in that situation, wouldn't you?!

Yes, in an ideal world. Unfortunately it’s far from ideal, financially speaking, for many people, and that includes men.

A male friend of ours used to mention his ‘fuck off’ money - I.e. enough that if he ever really hated his job, he could tell his boss to fuck off and walk out.

Wake up love and smell the coffee.

You have a point - I'm just saying what I believe the law is.

Don't shoot the messenger.🙂

Even £10 per week, £520 per year, is impossible for many, particularly at the moment.

I don’t understand your post. I work full time, earn good money and wouldnt depend upon on a man for anything shoukd my hubby and I split. So why would I need a separate £20k?

But support from UC starts to taper at £6000 in savings so they’d be no better off.

I'd stake my £20k on the fact that this is a made up OP.

Three word user name.

Goady premise.

Then in every reply stuff like this

I see it more as .........
That’s not what I’m saying ............
I see it more as ...........
My point was more about...............
........more just something I’ve always been told and wondered how others see it.
I don’t see it as...........
For me it’s more about ..........

Honestly, this bilge is so recognisable now you could write them yourself.

The sum is unreasonable for most, but I agree with the principle of having a rainy day fund. It's something my grandmother, the wisest woman I've known, instilled in us.
You don't need a fortune, but you need to have something that gives you the choice.

For me it’s not about the amount of money that’s split in the divorce, it’s about being able to flee when needed.

My mum and dad were happily married for years and she was a SAHM.
My dad suffered a trauma and became increasingly controlling and violent.

She had no money to her name and so she physically wasn’t able to get away.

My sisters DH had an affair and got into a relationship with the OW.
He refused to leave the home and my sister had nowhere to move temporarily.
If she had a bit of money, she could have moved out whilst waiting for the house to sell.