AIBU to discourage uni for daughter, I'm worried about debt without career plan?

[HappyLemonChickenCurry]

My eldest child is starting to think about her next move after 6th form and is talking about university, I went to uni in the 90's when financing was very different. She is academic and wants to go because she loves learning, but won't be studying a degree subject with a specific career goal or profession in mind. I am finding myself discouraging her because of the debt she will come out with and from what I hear about finding work after a degree, but am I wrong? Is the debt worth it for the formative experience? I would be really interested to hear experiences from those whose children have recently graduated, or peoples thoughts in general. It feel so counter-intuitive to be discouraging!

yes, YABU

She is academic and wants to go because she loves learning

This is why she should go.

I'm out of touch now re Student Loans are they no longer only payable when you earn over x amount?

Not your decision, ultimately, and it won’t be your debt.

I'm no help but in the same situation. DD is in the middle of a gap year and planning on going to a decent uni in Sept. Loves the subject but doesn't want to teach or particularly use the degree and has no career in mind. DH and I are saying to only go to uni if she needs a degree to do her chosen career but otherwise please find something else to do. Its so expensive and seems like the graduate market isn't great just now anyway.

It'll be her debt, not yours.

If she chooses to do nothing with her degree, that's also her choice.

You're right about them only being payable after you reach a specific earning threshold; the biggest issue, however, is the interest that's now being added to these loans, which is quite shocking and is looking like many students will never, ever pay off the debt, buy will still be liable to pay every month..

I think it’s a bit short sighted to just think of the debt without thinking of the career opportunities having a degree could give her.

I think it depends on many factors, but if she ever wants to live abroad, almost certainly she'll need a degree to satisfy work visa requirements for most countries (as opposed to those "working holiday visas" where you don't need a degree but they're time-limited). You also need a degree these days for many jobs as the basic barrier to entry. Grad schemes are a total mess and hard to get onto, but they were when I graduated (2010). Eventually we all muddle through.

As a teacher I'm still encouraging people to go to uni unless they really don't know what they want to do, in which case taking some time out is a good plan. My DSis doesn't have a degree and it's taken her into her mid-30s to "launch" in life and has only just bought a house at 35, whereas I was already a teacher with my own home in my mid-twenties because I had a degree. I took a year out before going to uni as well; I don't think that's ever a bad idea.

If money is a huge issue, could she live at home and do a distance degree e.g. the Open University? It's cheaper staying at home than going to uni and the tuition fees are lower.

YABU to point blank discourage her, YANBU to support her in finding alternatives.

I think this is exactly what OP is doing - it’s tough times for graduates currently both in terms of student loans and jobs (let alone careers).

There’s a balance here. Has she had decent careers guidance? Studying for the sake of it is a valid and a wonderful thing to do… however, as some done with a non descriptive, non vocational degree I wish someone had advised me about my options to combine a degree and love of learning with a good plan!

Speak to her 6th form college and ask about the careers service. Set up some work experience etc. law, finance, health and safety, optometry, quantity surveying, marketing. There are a vast array of degrees that can lead to good careers.

She needs to look for degree apprenticeships. There are more coming on stream. Her school should be giving her the options to explore.

Yes the loans are only payable after they earn over a certain amount, but that amount is relatively low, and interest is accruing. Once graduates are earning over the repayment threshold they will pay 9% of their income over the threshold until the debt is repaid, or written off.

I have 2 at uni, both on masters courses.
Both plan to have careers in the areas they are studying. The best way to for DS2 to get the job he wants in 4yrs, is to get a job (voluntary if necessary) in the field he’s interested in to make his CV look better than his peers. Job at Asda won’t help.
I know 2 people whose kids have got jobs as a solicitor and a clinical psychologist in the year they completed their degrees (2025)
I think if you want the uni experience it’s not worth the debt. If it’s the best way to get the job you want then it is.

She’a bright and wants to go. You should support that decision. I am open either way for my DC.

I recommend courses while living at home. The cost of living away is the biggest expense.

For me it is not about the career opportunities. DS1 is very academic and is going to spend three years at Oxbridge doing a creative subject he loves, surrounded by people who also love it, this is absolutely the best course for him to take in life, he will never have another opportunity like it, even though it is unlikely he will end up working in that sector. DS2 currently wants to do a much more career related subject, which he will get some funding for - it is also his passion. Of course I am pleased that he has this funding and career path but if he changes his mind in the next two years and wants to do something else, I wouldn't discourage him. Life is about more than a career plan from the age of 18.

Yes, this is my dilemma. I am hoping she takes a year out to have a think about it. I hate the idea that she starts her working life with thousand's of £'s of debt.

I understand OP, it’s all very well saying it’s not your debt, but you’re likely going to have to spend thousands of pounds supporting her for 3+ years and it’s perfectly reasonable to want that money to be an investment above and beyond just “enrichment”. Yes in a perfect world we’d educate people for as long as they want, but most families don’t have endless amounts of money to do so blindly.

I would be very reluctant to support my children through university without some kind of plan.

My DD17 is starting Uni in September with no clear career path. I've been 100% encouraging of her decision to go. She has the opportunity to spend 3/4 years immersing herself in doing what she loves, she can move away from home to an amazing city, it's the next stage of her growing up, she'll grow as a person and gain a lot of friends, life skills and more independence, which she's so ready for... Plus if she can delay entering the workplace for a few years then why not. She won't get this chance again. Once she's working, that's it for the rest of her life. She doesn't know what she wants to do afterwards but it'll become clear I'm sure. She certainly wouldn't know what she wants to do right now if she didn't go to uni.

Yes there will be debt but it's more like a tax. I got it free too, but the benefits from going to uni are huge and not just limited to a career path. Some people are skilled, some have a vocation, some are academic. I was always academic and while I'm in a senior level high paying job, it's nothing to do with my degree

came to see how you encourage a 18 year old to do anything? 🤣

My parents discouraged me to go to uni due to debt in the noughties (when fees were £3k) and it was awful. They made me feel unsupported, unmotivated and I went anyway, but our relationship never recovered

The biggest attraction of uni for many, is the moving away from home part!

So what will she do instead?
If someone is academic and loves learning then university is still a good option. She’ll have the opportunity to explore her career options while she’s there with all the support and resources in place.
Degree apprenticeships are for those with clear career plans. University is a better option for those who are unsure.

Can you, or her careers advisors, try to narrow down what she'd like to do as a career? Which would give her more of an idea of paths towards it.
If a degree wouldn't help, she could study for fun, in the evening; there are plenty of free options.
But ultimately, if she's academic and wants to go, I think it would be really unfair and short-sighted to stand in her way.
I was in her position and wasn't able to go. It's held me back most of my working life. For example, I joined the Civil Service as a Clerical Assistant but with a degree I'd have been able to go in as an Executive Officer (better pay, career progression etc). FIL (in the fashion trade) would only take on graduates. He took on a Zoology graduate as a buyer!
Bottom line - do your research.

I understand this. We would struggle to support two at Uni (all the parents I know pay for accommodation and living expenses on top of the loan) so it is not just their debt.
Year out with them earning some money would help solve this for us.

What does she want to study?